80+ Best Dog Jokes That Will Make You Howl

Dogs have dichromatic vision.
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Dogs are thought to be man's best friend due to their sense of loyalty and significant history with humans.

Dogs are carnivores by nature. They belong to the Canidae family, which also encompasses wolves, coyotes, jackals, and foxes.

Research shows that the symbiotic relationship between a dog and humans dates back 15,000 years. Over time, dogs' physical and social evolution has helped them acquire the ability to recognize and interact with humans more than any other species. Research shows that a dog can understand 160 human language words, signs and gestures on average.

If you're trying to learn some dog humor to impress your friends, check out this list! We have put together some hilarious dog jokes just for you.

For more exciting and funny animal puns and jokes, check out these hot dog puns and these alpaca puns.

Dog Jokes For Kids

There are more than 200 dog breeds worldwide. We're sure that you will find the perfect funny dog joke to tell your furry friend, you can just start by asking him or her a "what's up dog" joke. Here is a list of funny dog jokes and chihuahua jokes inspired by every woman and man's loyal companion and best friend, the dog.

1. Are you wondering what dogs have for breakfast? They have pooch-ed eggs.

2. Are you wondering what Dracula's favorite dog breed is? Well, it has to be a bloodhound.

3. What is the similarity between a dog and a mobile phone? Both have collar IDs.

4. Why did everyone love the doggy storyteller? He knew how to paws for dramatic effect.

5. Which dog breed enjoys a good relaxing bubble bath? A shampoodle.

6. What kind of dog doesn't make any sound? A hush puppy.

7. What do people call a dog that performs magic? A labracadabrador.

8. What musical instrument did the dog musician love to play? A trom-bone.

9. What did the dog do once he realized he left his phone in a store's parking lot? Well, he went to the barking lot to grab his phone.

10. What does a puppy say before consuming his food? Bone appetite!

11. Are you wondering what the dog said to the tree? Bark.

12. What would you call a puppy surrounded by a sound system? A sub-woofer.

13. What would you call a dog who lives in New York? A Yorkie.

14. What kind of dog is an expert in telling the time? A watchdog.

15. What would you get when you cross a dog and a flower? A collie-flower.

16. What did the dog do when the doorbell rang? The dog pressed paws on the TV show he was watching.

17. What would you get if you crossed a poodle and a cocker spaniel with a rooster? Cockapoodledoo.

18. What would you call a left handed dog boxer? A south paw.

19. What do archeologist dogs do with all the bones they find? They barium.

20. What do you get when you cross a dog with a calculator? A friend you can count on.

21. What's the similarity between a dog and a marine biologist? One wags his tail, and the other tags whales.

22. What do you get by crossing a golden dog with a telephone? A golden receiver.

23. Why did the dog want to cross the road? To get to the barking lot.

24. Why did the dog refuse to accompany his owner to the market? Because it was a flea market.

25. Why did Santa name his dog Frost? Because Frost bites.

26. What would happen if someone crossed a dog with a film studio? You would find yourself in collie-wood.

27. Why did the dog resign from his job? The work was too ruff!

28. What did the dog say after accidentally sitting on a sheet of sandpaper? Ruff!

29. Why did people say that the dog wasn't a good dancer? He had two left feet.

30. If a dog lost his tail, where would he go to get a new one? A re-tail shop.

31. What would you call a dog named Minton who ate two shuttlecocks? Bad Minton.

32. Why will dogs never win a dance reality show? Because they have two left feet.

33. What term do you use to refer to a dog that researches old trees? Well, you can call him a barkologist.

34. How did the dog train his flea? From scratch.

35. Why did the family take their dog to the watchmaker? It had ticks!

36. What would you call a dog from Asgard that owns a mighty hammer? A labrathor.

37. Which dog breed knows how to use the phone? A dial-matian.

38. What do you call an obedient dog? A sit bull terrier.

39. What do you get when you cross a dog with a large boat? A Ship Tzu.

40. Which dog lives in a cave? A Bat Terrier.

41. Why are Dalmatians not considered good at playing hide and seek? Because they are always spotted.

42. How did the dog laugh after listening to the joke? Chi-ha-ha.

43. What's the similarity between a dog and a tree? Both have barks.

44. Who is a dog's favorite playwright? William Shakespaw.

45. What did the neighbor say to the dog owner? I love walking your dog; it's the leashed I can do.

46. What's a dog's favorite fashion magazine? Vanity Fur.

47. What's a dog's favorite movie? Jurassic Bark.

48. What's a dog's favorite breakfast dish? Woof-fle.

49. What was the dog doing all night? He was barking all night without any paws.

50. What did the dog say to his wife? Howl will I ever live without you.

51. What did the dog say to the other dog? Let's raise the woof.

52. What did the dog say to his son? I woof you.

53. What did the dog say when he picked up the phone? I will collie you later.

54. How did the dog apologize? Please fur-give me.

55. What did the dog say to calm his stressed friend? Try to remain paw-sitive.

56. What did the dog say when he was asked about his hobbies? He said I am very paw-sionate about going out on walks and playing fetch.

57. What did the dog say when he went to the dog park for the second time? This place looks fur-miliar.

58. What did the dog say to its owner? I am so fur-tunate to have you in my life.

59. What did the annoyed dog say to another dog? Will you please stop hounding me?

60. What did the small dog who was madly in love say to his beloved? You are the corg-key of my heart.

61 Why was the dog upset? He was going through a rough pooch.

62. What's a dog's favourite music album? The 'Bark Side Of The Dog'.

63. What did the dog owner say when his dog ran away after chasing the squirrels? Let's not stop retrieving and catch the canine.

64. What was the group of dogs doing on the construction site? They were roof-ing!

65. What subject did the dog select as his major in college? Bark-ology.

Hot Dog Jokes

Corny jokes can be hilarious. Here are some jokes about hot dogs and pets to make you laugh.

66. How can you tell the difference between a businessman and a hot dog? Business people wear a suit but the dog just pants.

67. What would you give a sausage dog who has a fever? Mustard, cause it's the best thing for a hot dog.

68. Why is the puppy sitting next to the fire? He wants to become a hot dog when he grows up.

69. What's a hot dog wearing a sweater called? A chili dog.

70. Why did the vegetarian dog cross the road? To prove he wasn't chicken.

71. Why did the police not give the German hot dog bail? Because he gave the wurst answers.

Knock Knock Jokes About Dogs

Knock knock dog jokes will make you howl with laughter.

Knock knock jokes can be amusing and fun. Here are some hilarious doggy jokes for dog owners, which will surely make your day paw-sitive.

71. Knock Knock!

Who is there?

Dash.

Dash who?

No, it's called Dashchund!

72. Knock Knock!

Who is there?

Ken.

Ken who?

Ken you look after the dog for me while I run some errands?

73. Knock Knock!

Who is there?

Theodore.

Theodore who?

Theodore is closed. Can I bring my dog in?

74. Knock Knock!

Who is there?

Ty.

Ty who?

Ty up the dog before he starts chasing away the squirrels again.

75. Knock Knock!

Who is there?

Arthur.

Arthur who?

Arthur any more dog treats left for the puppies?

Cat And Dog Jokes

A relationship between a cat and a dog may vary depending on how socialized they are and the temperaments of different dog breeds. Here are some great cats and dogs jokes inspired by the cat and dog duo. Check them out.

76. Why did the cat refuse the offer letter to work for the dog? Because dogs hound their employees.

77. What's the worst part about it raining cats and dogs? You have to look out for the poodles.

78.What would you call a cat that accidentally wins a dog show? A cat-has-trophy.

79. What did the cat say to the dog who was being mean to her? I have a good purr-sonality.

80. What did people say when it started raining cats and dogs? As long as it does not rain-deers, we are good.

Puppy Jokes

Puppy jokes can be paw-some.

Jokes about puppies are so cute and adorable that you won't be able to stop using them once you start. These jokes about pets will have you rolling on the floor with laughter. Here are some corny dog jokes inspired by our love for puppies.

81. What's a puppy's favorite flavor of ice-cream? A pup-cicle.

82. What's a puppy's favorite type of pizza? A pupperoni pizza.

83. What does a puppy get after graduating from obedience school? A pet-degree.

84. What was the little Scottish puppy's reaction when he saw the monster? He was terrier-fied.

85. Who was the puppy waiting for eagerly on Christmas Eve? Santa Paws.

86. What's a puppy's favorite snack? Pup-corn.

Here at Kidadl, we have carefully created lots of great family-friendly puns for everyone to enjoy! If you liked our suggestions for dog jokes then why not take a look at these hamster puns, or for something different take a look at these dance puns, perfect for family members with two left feet!

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