100 Best Morning Jokes That Rise And Shine

Send our jokes for morning as good morning messages to make someone's day.
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Morning is the time of day from when the sun rises to noon.

Mornings are the beginning of a new day for everyone on the planet. As the sun rises in the east, morning begins, everyone wakes up and start their day.

This particular time of day brings such hope and joy to people. Duration and starting time of morning usually depends upon people's lifestyle from their particular part of the world and the duration of daylight in each season. In summer, as the sun rises early, mornings start early and the opposite happens in winters. Here we collected some morning jokes, good morning quotes that can even become your joke of the day.

You could also take a look at breakfast puns and toast puns.

Funny Good Morning Jokes To Have A Good Day

Here are some funny morning jokes, early morning jokes, that'll get you up with early morning humor and make your list for the joke of the day.

1. Have you heard about a man who told his family every morning that he was going jogging but never did? It was a running joke.

2. Why did the morning coffee never talk to the herbal drinks? Because they weren’t really his cup of tea.

3. How did the man burn 800 calories in the morning easily? He forgot his pizza inside his oven.

4. Did you hear about the man that got hit by the very same bike every single morning? It’s a vicious cycle.

5. Have you heard about the guy who found a bunch of celery every morning on his front doorstep? He thought he was being stalked.

6. When the man who was visiting his wife’s grave said "Morning" to another visitor, what did the other man reply? He said, "No, I'm just walking my dog."

7. What would you say to your plumber if you heard a tap on your door first thing in the morning? "You have quite a sense of humor."

8. Did you hear about the man that woke up in the morning and forgot which side the sun rises from? It eventually dawned on him.

9. What would you do if you had problems with your boiled eggs in the morning? Just crack it.

10. What do you call a radio that just works in the morning? An AM radio.

11. What did the man do when he found all his knick-knacks and books scattered all around the floor? He just blamed him-shelf.

12. What's the color of the sun when it rises in early morning? It's rose.

13. What did the police say when a man reported that someone stole his mirror? The police said that they were looking into it.

14. Have you heard about the Vicks VapoRub truck that overturned on the freeway in the morning the other day? Well, there certainly wasn't any congestion for the next 7-8 hours.

15. What would you call having mushrooms every day in the morning? It's what champignons eat.

16. Did you hear about the man that found a bunch of LEGO every morning on his front porch? He didn't know what to make of them.

17. What did the one-legged woman do at the ATM every morning? She checked her balance.

18. What did the man say to his wife when she was grouchy all day because they ran out of bread? "I didn't know you were lack-toast intolerant."

19. What does Iron Man say every morning when he stands in front of the magic mirror? He says, "Mirror, mirror on my wall, who is the ferrous of us all?"

20. Why do birds always sing in the morning? Because they don't go to work.

21. Why did the man always cheat on his diet in the morning? Because he thought, at the end of the day, he's staying faithful.

22. What did the woman say when she realized that her morning was actually bittersweet? She said, "That's the last time I drink spoiled milk with sugar".

23. Why did the man started going for body surfing every morning at the beach instead of watching the news? Because it kept him abreast of the current events.

24. What would you call it if you spent an entire morning coating a ladder with grease which leads into your attic? An anti-climb-attic morning.

25. Why did the jailer start counting the numbers of all the inmates in the morning? Because she wanted a con-census.

26. Which superhero delivers the morning papers? It's Newspaperman.

27. What did the man say when he woke up in the morning to find he had turned into a cat? He said, "Don’t ask meow it happened".

28. Did you hear about the girl that got a summer job in a high school that involved getting up very early in the morning with a paintbrush and a glass of water? It wasn't really high paying, but she made dew.

29. Have you heard about a Frenchman that choked while he was eating his morning omelet? He said, "Oeuf."

30. What did the woman say before telling jokes on 'early mornings'? "You people up for it?"

Delicious Early Morning And Breakfast Jokes

Funny good morning quotes and dad jokes like ours will motivate you in the morning to have a happy day.

In this list, you'll get some good day jokes, jokes about breakfast and so many other funny jokes to enjoy together.

31. What happened to the guy that accidentally made his morning coffee with some Red Bull instead of with water? He got halfway to his work before he realized he had forgotten his car.

32. What would happen if you were made to promise to put on your mask before going to work every morning? Well, I'd be late to work every day and definitely get tired of Jim Carey.

33. Why were the man and his family crying in the morning? They were coming back from a moving sale.

34. Did you hear about the man that has a glass eye? I didn't know about it until it came out during our breakfast conversation this morning.

35. What beverage do all sick people have in the morning? Cough-ee.

36. What do bakers say when they wake up in the mornings? "Time to get bread-y now."

37. What does a pastry chef say to himself in the morning every day? "I'll be making a lot of dough today."

38. What would you do if you got up in the morning, ran around the blocks a few times and got tired? I'd pick up the blocks and put them back in my brother's toy box.

39. Why did the man get arrested for pouring himself a cup of coffee in the morning? The police thought it was mugging.

40. Have you heard about the man who forgot how to put his seat belt on while he was going to work one morning? Well, after a while, it clicked.

41. What would you call it if you accidentally pumped unleaded gas into your diesel vehicle’s tank one morning? A very fuelish mistake.

42. What would you say if your wife asked for eggs in the morning? "Yolk k."

43. Did you hear about the man who thought his allotment was getting smaller every day when he measured it? He was slowly losing the plot.

44. Why did the man make his hamster an extra-strong coffee in the morning? He didn't want it to fall asleep at the wheel.

45. Have you heard about the man named Aaron who also has a son named Aaron and they go jogging together every morning? Well, they're running Aarons.

46. What drink do lobsters have in the morning? Clawfee.

47. What did the man say to his son when he wanted a frozen rito in the morning for breakfast? He said, "so you want a brrrr-rito?"

48. What would you call the alarm clock which always goes off at 2 o'clock in the morning every day? A ringing nightmare.

49. How did Moses make coffee in the morning? He-brewed it.

50. What does a Moogle need every day when it wakes up? It needs a kup-o coffee.

51. What would you call it if you accidentally spilled some coffee grinds in the morning? It was grounded.

52. What happened when the lawyer worried about his court case and forgot to use any coffee filter in the morning? Well, after brewing, the coffee had quite a lot of grounds to appeal.

53. What does a croissant say to a cup of coffee in the morning? "You're not really my cup of tea."

54. How does coffee usually help in the morning? It makes people coffeedent.

55. How do you feel every day before having your morning coffee? Depresso.

56. What happens when you finish drinking your cup of tea in the morning? It becomes emptea.

57. What would you call it if you had a gold-colored hot drink in a golden cup in the morning every day? My gilt-tea pleasure.

58. What happens when you smell breakfast in the morning? It would be bacon-ing me and I'd be very eggcited.

59. What would you say if your dad asks you how the breakfast waffles he made were? I'd say, "they weren't w-awful."

60. What do you say when someone compliments the eggs you cooked for breakfast? "Well, I'm an eggspert."

Funny Morning Jokes That'll Wake You Up

Here you'll find some of the funny good morning joke, sleep jokes, wake up jokes that will motivate you to get out the bed and roll on the floor laughing instead.

61. What happened to the guy that started jogging for his health? It's now been almost a year no one knows where he actually is.

62. What did the black hole reply when the other black hole said, "you should try slimming down a little" when they were jogging in space? He replied, "are you that dense?"

63. What would you call it if you choke on your water when jogging every morning for a week? The worst ever running gag.

64. What would you name a classic rock-themed morning jogging club? Runs 'n Goeses.

65. What would it be called if you refused to go running in the morning? Resistance Training!

66. What did the wife give his husband when he returned home all sweaty from his morning jog? The stink eye.

67. What did the tomato say while trying to help his friend who tripped and fell when jogging in the morning? He said, "just grab my Heinz, I'll help you up."

68. What do joggers usually do when they forget things? They always jog their memory.

69. What would you call it if you run a mediocre distance when you go jogging in the morning? Run of the mill.

70.  How do the crazy joggers go through any forest in the morning? They take the psychopath.

71. What would you call someone that can't stop jogging along the beach in the morning? They'd be called Joggernaut.

72. At what time of morning does usually a duck wake up? At the quack of dawn.

73. What would it be called if you woke up every day in the morning to the sound of zombies screaming? Dawn of the Dead.

74. What did the cheerleader wake her mom up with for breakfast on Mother’s Day morning? Cheerios.

75. Have you heard about McDonald's? They have eggspanded their breakfast menu.

76. What special thing did Egyptian kids do on Mother’s Day morning? They brought their mummy some breakfast in bed.

77. What do they usually serve for breakfast at the North Pole? Snowflakes.

78. What did the pirate always eat for breakfast? Captain Crunch.

79. What does Tony Stark always eat in the morning for breakfast? Iron Bran.

80. What does a dog love eating as breakfast food? Pooched eggs.

81. Why does Thanos eat cereal in the morning at breakfast? Because it's a part of a well-balanced breakfast.

82. What is the favorite meal of a car? Brake-fast.

83. What was the 'Rise and Shine Juice' that the cobbler invented to wake up his shoes in the morning? It was just a combination of yeast and shoe polish.

84. What does an author eat for breakfast every day? Synonym buns.

85. What do the snowmen eat for breakfast? Ice Krispies.

86. What did Tom say when his wife asked him to cook some breakfast? "Fine, I'll cook some pancakes," he said flippantly.

87. What does a cup say to the coffee every morning? "You’re brew-ti-ful."

88. What is a barista’s everyday morning mantra? "Rise and grind."

89. Why was the worker at the coffee shop fired? Because he kept showing up in Tea-shirts every morning to work.

90. Where do birds go every day to get a cup of coffee? To the NESTcafe.

Knock Knock Jokes To Have A Funny Morning

Fun and funny mornings begin with funny good morning quotes and morning dad jokes.

Here are some knock-knock jokes including morning jokes, waking up jokes and many more.

91. Knock! Knock!

Who's there?

Ben.

Ben who?

Ben knocking on the door all morning, could you let me in?


92. Knock! Knock!

Who's there?

Ewok

Ewok who?

Ewok early this morning.


93. Knock! Knock!

Who's there?

Ada.

Ada who?

Ada lot for breakfast, now I feel like throwing up.


94. Knock! Knock!

Who's there?

Hammond.

Hammond who?

Please, Hammond eggs for breakfast.


95. Knock! Knock!

Who's there?

Leah.

Leah who?

Leah-n an egg for breakfast.


96. Knock! Knock!

Who's there?

Loaf.

Loaf who?

I loaf bread for my breakfast.


97. Knock! Knock!

Who's there?

Sweden.

Sweden who?

I always Sweden my coffee in the morning.


98. Knock! Knock!

Who's there?

Dew.

Dew who?

Dew wanna go jogging tomorrow morning?


99. Knock! Knock!

Who's there?

Dawn.

Dawn who?

Dawn talk to me until I've had my coffee.


100. Knock! Knock!

Who's there?

Sweden.

Sweden who?

Norway, I like my coffee black in the morning.

Here at Kidadl, we have carefully created lots of great family-friendly jokes for everyone to enjoy! If you liked our suggestions for morning jokes then why not take a look at Egg Jokes, or Sleep Puns.

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