74 George Lopez Quotes

Why George Lopez quotes?

George Lopez is an American actor and stand-up comedian known for his self-produced TV series on ABC, 'George Lopez'. George Edward Lopez is also an inspiring icon for budding comedians and actors. His performances won him many accolades and a massive fan following from the Latino community.

Being Hispanic, Lopez is part of a small ethnic minority living in America. His journey to becoming successful has been full of hardships and struggles.

But his experience makes his approach to comedy unique. He can talk about mundane and serious topics and still make an audience laugh. If you would like to know him better, this collection of George Lopez quotes can give you an insight into his life and mindset.

What parents should know

• In 2002, George Lopez became one of the few Latinos to lead a television comedy show. He was among legends like Desi Arnaz, Freddie Prinze, and John Leguizamo.
• In 2007, the television network canceled George Lopez's show leaving many of the cast and crew of the show jobless.
• He is the co-author of his autobiographical book 'Why You Crying'.  

What to discuss with kids

• Hollywood actress Sandra Bullock helped George Lopez with his debut in television.
• Lopez has co-hosted the Emmy Awards and appeared twice as the host of the Latin Grammy Awards. 
• In 2019, he was inducted into the California Hall of Fame. 

Funny George Lopez Quotes

1. "I'll go talk to the cop. You go back to your desk and pretend nothing's wrong, do some work. Okay? But don't pretend, actually do some work! - 'Max's Big Adventure', Season 2, 'George Lopez'

2. "As long as you're a tax deduction, you'll always be safe in my house." - 'George Lopez', 2002-2007

3. "Two wrongs do not make a right, but three rights make a left."

4. "Whoever is my relative, I will not be nice to them."

5. "When I was 10, there wasn't trampolines and cartoon characters; I never went to Chuck E Cheese! My mom said, 'you wanna see a mouse pull the refrigerator out!"

6. "I'm a big fan of reality shows. I thought the first one, Dukes Of Hazzard, captured white people perfectly."

7. "I can't pay her back, but what I can do is make her as happy as she thought I would when we first got married." 

8. "No, Angie, it's instant. Like when someone trips in the cafeteria, and you're laughing so hard milk comes out of your nose, the guy next to you is laughing so hard he accidentally farts. BOOM! Friends for life!"

9. "A Dodger uniform just doesn't look good with a cummerbund."

10. "From now on, we're homeschooling you. Whatever we don't know, you don't know." - 'George Lopez', 2002-2007

11. "When did the Korean War start? I don't know, and neither do you!" - 'George Lopez', 2002-2007

12. "If the worst thing that can happen is that nobody laughs, then I can deal with that because the worst thing that can happen at the factory is that I could lose a limb or be crushed by a huge machine."

13. "We're Mexi-cans, not Mexi-can'ts." - 'Beverly Hills Chihuahua', 2008

14. "Tasers don't work on us. When you grow up poor, you get shocked... every single day. Toasters, lamps..."

15. "Presents? We already bought you a lot of things. 'Member, when we were at the market, and I bought you gum? You'member."

16. "My wife gave me a book before we got married, Oh, the Places You'll Go!, by Dr. Seuss. She was trying to tell me something, about what I was capable of, but I didn't get it." 

17. "Angie, I've seen my mom wrestle two cops to the ground with a taser dart in her neck, and you cry when your shoes pinch. Good luck, Bambi!" - 'George Lopez', 2002-2007

18. "Seems like just yesterday you were my little girl on the tricycle. Now you're gonna be a young woman in a car, running over a little girl on the tricycle."

19. "I'd shake his hand, but I think that's what's holding up his pants."

20. "Sure, I'm a man. I like to go to a barbecue and see beans that I like: baked beans, red beans, black beans, big plump garbanzos. But in the end, I always come home to my sweet, sweet corn." - 'George Lopez', 2002-2007

21. "When we got married, we agreed on a boy for me and a girl for you. Mine's upstairs sleeping. Good luck with yours!"

22. "The guy is like Honduran-German. Why would you pretend to be Mexican? I think he had that intention from the beginning that he was going to play Mexican."

23. "Junior: Don't mess with me, homes.

George Lopez: Homes? Look, it's Casper the Friendly Chicano. What are you, brother, besides confused?" - 'George Lopez', 2002-2007

24. "Memories, priceless. Well, not really priceless, but there you go!"

25. "George: Okay, I'm here. Have you found Carmen yet?

Angie: No, And I'm worried sick. It's her first day at a new school, and she should've been home an hour ago.

George: Come on, it's an hour. She's got no money. She's got no friends. She's probably walking around the mall crying." - 'George Lopez', 2002-2007

26. "One time, I was so hungry, I ate the beans in a bean bag chair." - 'George Lopez', 2002-2007

27. "This is L.A. You wanna learn Spanish? Take the bus."

Inspirational George Lopez Quotes

28. "I used to be ashamed by the way that I grew up. I tried to lie my way through better times, but when you think that honesty and truth is really your best weapon, you embrace it and put it behind you. In the end, it drives you and motivates you to do good work."

29. "No particular race is the enemy. Ignorance is the enemy." - www.carmelmagazine.com, February 1, 2007

30. "So I started to relax and would work on my act eight hours a day, sitting at a desk writing at my grandmother's house, and I would put on Richard Pryor Live on Long Beach and would play it like a loop and think and write."

31. "I grew up not having a father. Golf is the father I never had. It taught me honesty and respect and discipline, and it taught me to control my temperament." - www.psychedonline.com, April 24, 2007

32. "We need to get better at voting and be a voice for the people who do not have one." - The Washington Times, January 18, 2015

33. "I promised myself that if I ever got an opportunity where I would be able to make a difference and have a say, that I would want to deliver [that] message [of inclusivity]."

34. "I think my duty is to go back and tell kids, 'Whatever color you are, wherever you come from, anything and everything is possible.' And I'm living proof." - Interview with Brett Wilbur, February 1, 2007

35. "Life is moments going by, but if you don't grab them, they're gone. For a long time, the only moments that were available were bad ones. So now I make sure to grab the good ones."

36. "We're going to vote for the right person who can restore faith and hope in this country. Latinos feel disenfranchised. Obama's dream is our dream."

37. "If laughter is the best medicine, I promise to continue to make you laugh as my wife and I work together with the National Kidney Foundation to save lives."

38. "When I look at the Gospel, I see how it is speaking to me at this time. I see how to be to others, and it helps."

39. "No one should be ashamed about where they come from as long as you desire to be a compassionate and decent person."

40. "It was June 4, 1979, the first time I went on stage. I didn't know I could do it, but I knew I couldn't not do it. I quit everything in my life, and this was the one thing I couldn't quit." - PEOPLE, September 5, 2003

Famous George Lopez Quotes

41. "When you go to cable, there are no stations and no affiliates, and they allow you to do your show." - www.cnn.com, April 14, 2010

42. "I look at movies, unfortunately, and I still see a lot of movies." - January 18, 2015, The Washington Times

43. "I have dogs in my house, and much like teenagers, at some point, they leave the parents. Even though they're in the same house, they live independently."

44. "If you make waffles, throw out the first one."

45. "That's the Lopez way." - 'George Lopez', 2002-2007

46. "I didn't come from a background where I saw a lot of loving couples. All my aunts and uncles were either split up or fighting all the time."

47. "It's not even about black and white any more because so many people are from mixed backgrounds and mixed ethnicities, and it's just a great time to be able to pull all that together." - Interview with Todd Leopold,  www.cnn.com, March 30, 2009

48. "I spend a lot of time alone, and my wife understands that I need to be alone. I enjoy being alone. But I'm never lonely."

49. "I never get to do nothin' in this house!"

50. "I didn't do well for years, and I quit. I started to break down why I was afraid and started to look at people I admired, like Richard Pryor, Eddie Murphy, Freddie Prinze, George Carlin, and all."

51. "I had a very difficult childhood. I was surrounded by people who had both parents, which made me feel different."

52. "David Letterman is the best late-night talk show host right now, hands down, and has been since he first took the desk."

53. "I've spent days in cinemas answering questions from the audience, in interviews, traveling abroad, and all they do is thank me nicely."

54. "It's an honor to walk in the footsteps of a legend. As host I intend to honor the tradition of The Bob Hope Classic and have a great time blazing a new path."  

55. "Immigration is an issue of global significance in America. And if you look at the terrorist alerts and attacks, Latinos [as a group] are not in the top five list [for] terror alerts." - The Washington Times, January 18, 2015

56. "Shows should just be able to be shows without hyphenating their lead characters." 

Best George Lopez Quotes

57. "When things are bad, it's the best time to reinvent yourself."

58. "I'm not afraid to take on somebody or say something that somebody will find offensive because, unfortunately, in comedy, you can't say anything really good without offending somebody." - www.movieweb.com, March 26, 2009

59. "I never realized I could love people as much as I do now."

60. "Sometimes, when you win, you think you're going to get everything to go your way." - The Washington Times, January 18, 2015

61. "An animal has to suffer for us old-school Latinos to get what we want." - The Washington Times, January 18, 2015

62. "Carmen, it's okay, you're beautiful on the inside, they all don't hate you, you'll find something you're good at, there'll be other boys, you probably need some time alone, see you tomorrow morning, honey."

63. "I love comedy, and I would write things to myself as an exercise in writing."

64. "Finally, there is someone that you can invest in that looks like you speaks like you, relates to things you relate to, and make our culture okay to talk about."

65. "I believe that there are certain things that could be taken care of that you don't need a strong political background in."

66. "Imagine going in knowing that no Mexican American before you had ever succeeded in a lead role," 

67. "The only healthy relationships I saw were on TV."

68. "By the time I was 11, I wanted to be a comedian. So all those years later, I've managed to achieve my dream as a kid, and it wasn't easy." - www.carmelmagazine.com, February 1, 2007

69. "Laughter survives… it has to survive."

70. "Freddie Prinze was my idol, and he died, and there is not much of his stuff to look at. But now, your comedy can live on forever." - August 2010, www.smithsonianmag.com.

71. "Life is great, and golf has been one of the great parts of it for me."

72. "I didn't want to be nobody and that was the only way I could be somebody was to do stand-up." 

73. "Having a bit of a rougher existence early on, it made me appreciate the work ethic that my grandparents instilled in me."

74. "The truth makes people laugh." 

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