25 Norm Crosby Quotes

Norm Crosby was an American comedian born into a Jewish family in Boston, Massachusetts.

Norm Crosby was best known for his use of malapropisms. Norm Crosby co-hosted the television series 'Everything Goes', 'The Comedy Shop', and 'The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson'.

The Borscht Belt comedian also starred in movies like 'Grownups 2' and '8 Crazy Nights'. Here is a list of Norm Crosby quotes specially curated for you.

The following is a list of the best Norm Crosby quotes by the American comedian. These Norm Crosby quotes might just light the spark if you are looking for some inspiration.

“I was the first spokesperson for the Better Hearing Institute in Washington. And that's the message we tried to send out – there is hearing help out there, and the technology and options are amazing.”

“Although I had a good job as an advertising manager for a shoe company in Boston, I really liked to fool around with comedy. Doing things that give you joy is so beautiful.”

“I would watch The Ed Sullivan Show and borrow a few lines here and there from guests like Red Buttons and Buddy Hackett to create a routine. Then I started getting invited to do political functions like the governor's birthday ball or mayor's dinner.”

“Every city you go to has television and radio talk shows that are dying to give young comics a showcase. They all want to be able to say that so-and-so started here, got his first break on this show.”

“That to me is what comedy is all about: keeping fresh and keeping current and changing with the times.”

“I met Elvis first in Las Vegas. I think I was appearing with Tom Jones and he came backstage to say hello to Tom or we went to his dressing room to say hello.”

“Hearing aids didn't cause any problem with my social life, my career, no problem at all, and I've been wearing them for a long time. As a matter of fact, once I became an entertainer and started working on television, I was probably the first performer to talk about hearing problems on the air.”

“I think it's the most wonderful thing in the world to have an identity, something the audience can remember you for.”

“Television and radio talk shows are quite good when it comes to creating a buzz about something fresh.”

“My hearing loss was essentially due to noise exposure during my military service. I was on an anti-submarine sub-chaser in WWII, and we had lots of depth charges going off all around us. There were plenty of explosions, and they were loud!”

(Learn some great Norm Crosby quotes and sayings about fate and putting yourself first.)

Here is a list of funny and amusing quotes from the American comedian and Malapropisms master Norm Crosby.

“When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.”

“USA Today once did a big article called, 'Who said it? Was it Norm or George Bush?' They had quotes of mine and quotes of his, and they went to some congressmen and senators and said, 'Who said it?' It was hysterical.”

“If your eyes hurt after you drink coffee, you have to take the spoon out of the cup.”

“Gene Autry, Roy Rogers, Dale Evans - these people are giants, legends; their names are household words. Of course, so's Jell-O.”

“A young comic, if he's any good, can easily get on Carson or Griffin or Dinah Shore, because they want to say the same thing, that they discovered the new talent.”

“I've been on the Tonight Show a million times, and I'd be embarrassed to do the same thing more than once.”

“I'm a great audience myself. I tried to keep in the background while others were on, but sometimes I'd just get hysterical.”

“It was a melting pot in Las Vegas. You got every age level, every ethnic background, every social aura - it was an absolute Americana audience... people who were there to celebrate occasions; people who were there to gamble; people who were there because they were awed by the whole Vegas operation. Tourists.”

Here's a list of short and amazing Norm Crosby quotes to brighten your day.

“Listen to the blabbing brook.”

“Old is when people compliment your alligator shoes and you aren't wearing any.”

“All's fair if you have a really good attorney.”

“A handicap is only if you let it be a handicap.”

“It's extremely hard work keeping fresh.”

“My school was so tough the school newspaper had an obituary section.”

“I think it is- the biggest plus the performer can have is to be a little unique.”

“When my dad was explaining the facts of life to me, he drew me a big diaphragm.”