32 Talladega Nights Quotes From The Hilarious Racing Movie
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'Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby' is an American comedy film released in 2006.
Directed Adam Mckay, written by Adam Mckay and Will Ferrel, the movie is a NASCAR parody. The story revolves around the life of Ricky Bobby who finds his way to becoming the best racing driver of all time.
The movie picturizes the life of Ricky Bobby (Will Ferrel), who grows up to be in the pit crew of the racing star where he gets his breakthrough into the world of being a sports car racer.
Soon he emerges as the invincible hero sticking to the phrase "If you're not first, you're last" said by his father Reese Bobby (Gary Cole), when he was younger.
Ricky teams up with his childhood friend Cal Naughton Jr (John C. Reiley) to race their way to success.
With a larger than life mansion, a beautiful wife Carley (Leslie Bibb), two children- Walker (Houston Tumlin) and Texas Ranger (Grayson Russell), Ricky's life is a dream for many, until he loses a race in a crash which supposedly ends his racing career and demotes him to the lowest position.
With the help of his family, Ricky soon regains the courage to race again.
He reunites with his friends from the track and happens to defeat the current top racer Jean Girard (Sacha Baron Cohen).
'Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby' is an evergreen comedy with hidden lessons of life and success. If you like our article on Talladega Nights quotes, do check out our articles on 'The Other Guys' quotes and Will Ferrell quotes.
Funny 'Talladega Nights' Quotes
As satirical as the title, 'Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby' is a heroic comedy that follows a biopic standard of the life of Ricky Bobby who overcomes every obstacle in his way. Here are some hilarious 'Talladega Nights' quotes.
1.“Old man, I’m gonna come at you like a spider monkey!”
-Texas Ranger.
2.“Ricky Bobby: You can't have two number ones.
Cal Naughton Jr.: Yeah, 'cause that would be eleven.”
-'Talladega Nights'.
3."Well, Dick, here's the deal: I'm the best there is, plain and simple."
-Ricky Bobby.
4.“What is that, a catchphrase or is that epilepsy?”
-Jean Girard.
5."Ricky Bobby: From now on, you're the Magic Man and I'm El Diablo.
Cal Naughton Jr.: What does 'Diablo' mean?
Ricky Bobby: It's like... Spanish for like a fighting chicken."
-'Talladega Nights'.
6.“Are we about to get it on? Because I’m as hard as a diamond in an ice storm right now.”
-Ricky Bobby.
7.“This sticker is dangerous and inconvenient, but I do love Fig Newtons."
-Ricky Bobby.
8."I hope that both of you have sons... Handsome, beautiful, articulate sons, who are talented and star athletes and they have their legs taken away. I mean I pray you know that pain and that hurt."
-Ricky Bobby.
9."I'm Ricky Bobby."
-Ricky Bobby.
10."Wow, I feel like I'm in Highlander."
-Ricky Bobby.
11.“I threw a bunch of Grandpa Chip’s war medals off the bridge.”
-Walker.
12.“Well let me just quote the late-great Colonel Sanders, who said...'I'm too drunk to taste this chicken.'”
-Ricky Bobby.
'Talladega Nights' Baby Jesus Quotes
Ricky Bobby refers to 'Jesus' as 'Baby Jesus' in one of the film's supper scenes where the family says grace before beginning to eat. Check out these funny quotes from the scene in 'Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby.'
13."Dear Lord Baby Jesus, I want to thank you for this wonderful meal, my two beautiful sons, Walker and Texas Ranger, and my red-hot smokin' wife, Carley."
-Ricky Bobby.
14."Dear Lord baby Jesus, lyin' there in your ghost manger, just lookin' at your Baby Einstein developmental videos, learnin' 'bout shapes and colors."
-Ricky Bobby.
15.“I like to picture Jesus in a tuxedo t-shirt, cause it says, like, I want to be formal but I want to party too. Cause I like to party, so I like my Jesus to party.”
-Cal Naughton Jr.
16.“I like to think of Jesus as a mischievous badger.”
-Cal Naughton Jr.
17.“I like to picture Jesus as a figure skater. He wears like a white outfit, and He does interpretive ice dances of my life's journey.”
-Cal Naughton Jr.
18."I like to think of Jesus like with giant eagles wings, and singin' lead vocals for Lynyrd Skynyrd with like an angel band and I'm in the front row and I'm hammered drunk!”
-Cal Naughton Jr.
19.“Help me Jesus! Help me Jewish God! Help me Allah! AAAAAHHH! Help me Tom Cruise! Tom Cruise, use your witchcraft on me to get the fire off me!”
-Ricky Bobby.
20."Hang on, Baby Jesus, this is gon' get bumpy!"
-Ricky Bobby.
21."Dear Eight Pound, Six Ounce, Newborn Baby Jesus, donít even know a word yet, just a little infant, so cuddly, but still omnipotent."
-Ricky Bobby.
22."Dear Tiny Jesus, in your golden fleece diapers with your tiny, little fat balled up fists."
-Ricky Bobby.
'Talladega Nights' Movie Quotes
Ricky Bobby's life is an inspirational example of the numerous hurdles that suddenly pop up and how he learns to not drive with the fear of losing again. Find some enlivening Talladega Nights quotes here.
23."Glenn: So, I was talking to Nana on Saturday. Her birthday's coming up, and I don't know what to get her. She's gonna be 88...
Kyle: Get her a coffin."
-'Talladega Nights'.
24.“You gotta learn to drive with the fear, and there ain’t nothing more God damn frightening than driving with a live cougar in the car.”
-Reese Bobby.
25.“Losing is never fun, but here's a little something to keep your spirits up. It's real nice, I got it at Target. It was on sale.”
-Reese Bobby.
26.“Like the frightened baby chipmunk, you are scared by anything that is different.”
-Jean Girard.
27."Now, Ricky, the doctor told us that we should let you work it out on your own sweet time, but...Ricky, you can walk."
-Lucius Washington.
28."Someone didn't love you enough when you were little, did they?"
-Texas Ranger.
29.“If you ain’t first, you’re last.”
-Ricky Bobby.
30."Guys! No tires! We're not a pit crew anymore, we're a car wash team."
-Lucius Washington.
31.“You don’t understand. You don’t understand because you don’t understand liberty. You don’t understand freedom. So, you put a crack in my arm like the crack in the Liberty Bell! You hear me?”
-Ricky Bobby.
32."I’m not sure what to do with my hands."
-Ricky Bobby.
Here at Kidadl, we have carefully created lots of interesting family-friendly quotesfor everyone to enjoy! If you liked our suggestions for 'Talladega Nights' quotes then why not take a look at 'Blades of Glory' quotes, or comedian quotes.
main image credit: Bruce Alan Bennett / Shutterstock.com
second image credit: Grindstone Media Group / Shutterstock.com
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Bachelor of Arts Hons specializing in Modern Languages (French and Spanish)
Monisha KochharBachelor of Arts Hons specializing in Modern Languages (French and Spanish)
A Modern Languages graduate from the University College London, Monisha with a passion for travel and exploring different cultures. She is fluent in French and Spanish and is currently learning Hindi. Monisha enjoys discovering new foods and is an avid sports fan, following soccer and Formula 1. In her spare time, she enjoys playing tennis and watching TV shows.
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