65+ The Good Place Quotes For All Sitcom Lovers

Moumita Dutta
Dec 12, 2023 By Moumita Dutta
Originally Published on Jan 31, 2021
Edited by Isobel Murphy
Woman relaxing at home in evening and watching TV.
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Age: 0-99
Read time: 11.5 Min

'The Good Place' is a Michael Schur production that ran for four seasons on NBC.

The show is an American fantasy and comedy drama that revolves around the aftermath of death. As the name of the show goes, 'The Good Place' is a utopia designed by Michael in order to provide a home for people after they die.

Eleanor, played by Kristen Bell, lands in this heaven after she finds herself dead in a mall parking lot accident, but soon is left to realise that she was sent there by mistake.

For the four seasons that this show ran, it managed to garner a pretty spectacular fan following who closely followed the journey of the six lead characters: Eleanor, Chidi, Tahani, Jason, Michael and Janet.

They are quirky, and they are relatable and most often than not, they are incredibly funny.

Therefore, it's not a surprise that you miss the show. We do too. But worry no more. Here are some of the best 'The Good Place' quotes for you to enjoy and relive the magical moments! Here you will find, 'The Good Place' funny quotes, 'The Good Place' Janet quotes and 'The Good Place' Michael quotes.

If you like what you read check out our ['Parks And Rec' quotes] and ['It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia' quotes] for more.

Motivational 'The Good Place' Quotes

Television Sitcom Concept. Four Diverse Friends having Fun in Living Room. Funny Sketch of One Couple Eating Pizza the Other Dieting. Comedy Series Broadcasting on Network Channel, Streaming Service.

The show was not only funny it had some deep thoughts to put out in the world too. Though they mostly came from Chidi and Michael, the other characters were not that far behind. Here are some motivational and inspiring quotes from 'The Good Place'.

1. “You fail and then you try something else. And you fail again and again, and you fail a thousand times, and you keep trying because maybe the 1,001st idea might work. Now, I’m gonna and try to find our 1,001st idea.”

– Michael, 'The Good Place'.

2. “It turns out life isn’t a puzzle that can be solved one time and it’s done. You wake up every day, and you solve it again.”

– Chidi Anagonye, 'The Good Place'.

3. “The point is, people improve when they get external love and support. How can we hold it against them when they don’t?”

– Michael, 'The Good Place'.

4. "Chidi Anagonye: Can I ask you something, buddy? How did you... know?

Jason Mendoza: It wasn’t like I heard a bell ring or anything. I just suddenly had this calm feeling, like the air inside my lungs was the same as the air outside my body. It was peaceful."

– 'The Good Place'.

5. “What matters isn’t if people are good or bad. What matters is, if they’re trying to be better today than they were yesterday. You asked me where my hope comes from? That’s my answer.”

– Michael, 'The Good Place'.

6. “You’re cool, dope, fresh and smart-brained. I’ve never seen you dance, but I bet you’re good, ’cause you’re good at everything. You’re awesome! Be nicer to yourself.”

— Jason Mendoza,'The Good Place'.

7. “In football, trying to run out the clock and hoping for the best never works. It’s called prevent defense. You don’t take any chances and just try and hold on to your lead. But prevent defense just prevents you from winning! It’s always better to try something.”

– Jason Mendoza, 'The Good Place'.

8. “If soulmates do exist, they’re not found. They’re made.”

– Michael, 'The Good Place'.

9. “If you try and ignore your sadness, it just ends up leaking out of you anyway. I’ve been there. And everybody’s been there. So don’t fight it.”

— Eleanor Shellstrop, 'The Good Place'.

10. “I had a friend that said whenever she was doing something bad, she’d hear this little voice in her head… Distant little voice, saying, ‘Oh, come on now. You know this is wrong.’ And then when she started doing good things, that voice went away.”

— Michael,'The Good Place'.

11. “Picture a wave in the ocean. You can see it, measure it, its height, the way the sunlight refracts when it passes through, and it’s there, and you can see it, you know what it is. It’s a wave. And then it crashes on the shore, and it’s gone. But the water is still there.”

– Chidi Anagonye 'The Good Place'.

12. “I argue that we choose to be good because of our bonds with other people and our innate desire to treat them with dignity. Simply put, we are not in this alone.”

— Chidi Anagonye, 'The Good Place'.

13. “I proposed a rule that Chidis shouldn’t be allowed to leave because it would make Eleanors sad, and I could do this forever, zip you around the universe showing you cool stuff, and I’d still never find the justification for getting you to stay. Because it’s a selfish rule. I owe it to you to let you go.”

– Eleanor Shellstrop, 'The Good Place'.

14. “Jason: So many memories of this place. Eating frozen yogurt and then having diarrhea and then eating more frozen yogurt and then more diarrhea. Maybe I should’ve realized this isn’t The Good Place because of all the diarrhea.

Chidi: Maybe you shouldn’t be eating all that frozen yogurt right now.”

— 'The Good Place'.

Funny 'The Good Place' Quotes

Well, if there's one thing ‘The Good Place’ delivers with every episode, it's comedy. The show has had some of the best, epic one-liners from its characters. Here is a collection of funny quotes from the show for you to share a laugh over!

 

15. “Don’t worry, demons can’t die. He’ll slowly re-form himself over a few months, passing through all the stages of demon growth. Larvae, slug monster, spooky little girl, teenaged boy, a giant ball of tongues, social media CEO, and then finally demon.”

– Michael, 'The Good Place'.

16. “Eleanor Shellstrop: Ugh, I hate jazz. Every jazz song is like 40 minutes long. It’s like, we get it. You can blow on a trumpet. Wrap it up, Elton John.

Chidi: Famously, a piano player.”

- 'The Good Place'.

17. “It’s not about who you know. Enlightenment comes from within. The Dalai Lama texted me that.”

-Tahani, 'The Good Place'.

18. “I’m just not a ‘new experience’ kind of guy. My comfort zone is basically like, that chair, and honestly? The arms are a little sharp.”

– Chidi Anagonye, 'The Good Place'.

19. “We do nothing. We hope that our early successes make up for the embarrassing mess we’ve become. Like Facebook. Or America.”

– Eleanor Shellstrop, 'The Good Place'.

20. “I am a strong, independent acid snake in the skinsuit of a strong, independent woman!”

– Vicky, 'The Good Place'.

21. “Okay, I've made my decision. I want to, start crying.”

-Chidi Anagonye, 'The Good Place'.

22. “You know the sound that a fork makes in the garbage disposal? That’s the sound that my brain makes all the time.”

-Chidi Anagonye, 'The Good Place'.

23. "I can’t believe Michael betrayed us again, why is it always the ones you most expect?"

-Jason, 'The Good Place'.

24. “I even watched all ten seasons of the show 'Friends'. Boy, those friends really were ‘friends’, weren’t they? Although – and I realise this is the kind of observation that would only occur to the mind of an eternal being. How did they afford that apartment? A waitress and a chef with those Manhattan real estate prices."

-Michael, 'The Good Place'.

25. “I haven’t been this upset since my good friend Taylor was rudely upstaged by my other friend Kanye, who was defending my best friend Beyoncé.”

-Tahani Al Jamil, 'The Good Place'.

26. "In case you were wondering, I am, by definition, the best version of myself"

-Janet, 'The Good Place'.

27. “Jason, you seem thoughtful. And that concerns me.”

-Tahani Al Jamil, 'The Good Place'.

28. “When I first read Aristotle, I thought it was pronounced like Chipotle. Wait a minute, is it Chip-o-tottle?”

-Eleanor Shellstrop, 'The Good Place'.

29. “I always have to have my sashes custom made due to my height and bottom size.”

-Tahani Al Jamil, 'The Good Place'.

30. “I was a mediocre person. I should get to spend eternity in a mediocre place. Like Cincinnati!”

-Eleanor Shellstrop, 'The Good Place'.

31. “Ya basic!”

-Eleanor Shellstrop, 'The Good Place'.

32. “You know, sometimes a flaw can make something even more beautiful. Like with Cindy Crawford and how short she is.”

-Tahani Al Jamil, 'The Good Place'.

33. “Things got out of hand, and now I’m her bridesmaid.'”

-Eleanor Shellstrop, 'The Good Place'.

34. “'You’re not better than me’ was my yearbook quote.”

-Eleanor Shellstrop, 'The Good Place'.

35. "I would say I outdid myself, but I’m always this good. So I simply did myself."

-Tahani Al Jamil, 'The Good Place'.

36. “I am pretty good at turning every place I go into my personal hell.”

-Chidi Anagonye, 'The Good Place'.

37. “It’s like, who died and left Aristotle in charge of ethics?”

-Eleanor Shellstrop, 'The Good Place'.

38. “I’m British, I never cry!”

-Tahani Al Jamil, 'The Good Place'.

39. "Eleanor Shellstrop: What’s wrong with ombre highlights?

Tahani Al Jamil: Eleanor, please. This week has been hard enough."

- 'The Good Place'.

40. "Why do bad things always happen to mediocre people who are lying about their identities?"

– Eleanor Shellstrop, 'The Good Place'.

41. "Michael: You’re mad at me.

Eleanor: I’m not mad, I’m just disappointed.

Michael: Oh, come on! Everyone knows that’s worse."

- 'The Good Place'.

42. “If you love someone, set them free. My good friend and yoga pupil, Sting, no last initial, told me that.”

— Tahani Al-Jamil, 'The Good Place'.

43. “I haven’t encountered this much resistance since I tried to get Timothée Chalamet to go out into the sun.”

-Tahani Al Jamil, 'The Good Place'.

44. "Michael: How do ethical philosophers feel about murder?

Chidi: It’s frowned upon."

-'The Good Place'.

45. “Michael: I just want to make sure I have this right. Um, Jianyu is not a Taiwanese monk, but rather someone named Jason Mendoza, a failed DJ from Jacksonville, Florida.

Jason Mendoza: I wasn’t a failed DJ. I was pre-successful.”

— 'The Good Place'.

46. “No one can ever truly turn over a new leaf. Sure, Ben Affleck told me he’d matured as an artist after he directed Argo, but then, right on schedule, it was, ‘Guess what, Tahani, I’m gonna be Batman.'”

-Tahani Al Jamil, 'The Good Place'.

47. “I know it sounds crazy. But if it weren’t crazy, they wouldn’t call it a leap of faith. They would call it a sit of doubting.”

— Eleanor Shellstrop, 'The Good Place'.

48. “I am absolutely paralyzed by decision-making.”

-Chidi Anagonye, 'The Good Place'.

49. “You know I’m trying to say ash-hole instead of ash-hole, right?”

- Eleanor Shellstrop, 'The Good Place'.

50. “What if the reason you want to murder someone is to make your life easier? That’s okay, right?”

-Michael, 'The Good Place'.

51. “My soulmate will be…books.”

-Chidi Anagonye, 'The Good Place'.

52. “Kissing is gross. You just mash your food holes together. It’s not for that.”

-Michael, 'The Good Place'.

53. “Birth is a curse and existence is a prison.”

-Michael, 'The Good Place'.

54. “Principles aren’t principles when you pick and choose when you’re gonna follow them.”

— Chidi Anagonye, 'The Good Place'.

55. “Serious question: should we kill them?”

-Michael, 'The Good Place'.

56. “Lonely gal margarita mix for one.”

-Michael, 'The Good Place'.

57. “I might not have been a saint, but it’s not like I killed anybody... I never found a wallet outside of an IHOP and thought about returning it but saw the owner lived out of state so just took the cash and dropped the wallet back on the ground.”

-Eleanor Shellstrop, 'The Good Place'.

58. “Sometimes a flaw can make something even more beautiful. Like with Cindy Crawford and how short she is.”

— Tahani Al-Jamil, 'The Good Place'.

59. “Jason Mendoza: When I say I am meditating, I am just trying to figure out what the fork is happening. I think we might be in an alien zoo or on a prank show.

Eleanor Shellstrop: No Jianyu, we are dead..”

— 'The Good Place'.

60. “I’m going to tell you the same thing that I told Mark Zuckerberg right before he ousted Eduardo Saverin. You are smart, you are capable, and the time has come to hit ‘unfriend’. I also told Mark to lose the ‘the’. Just ‘Facebook.’ That was me.”

— Tahani Al Jamil, 'The Good Place'.

61.“I’m too young to die and too old to eat off the kids’ menu. What a stupid age I am.”

— Jason Mendoza, 'The Good Place'.

62. “We don’t make any sense together, and yet, when I’m with you, I can really let my hair down, metaphorically speaking of course, because I’d never have it up in the first place. I’m not a factory worker.”

— Tahani Al Jamil, 'The Good Place'.

63. “It’s a rare occurrence, like a double rainbow. Or like someone on the internet saying, ‘You know what? You’ve convinced me I was wrong’.”

-Michael, 'The Good Place'.

. “64. Now we’re going to do the most human thing of all: attempt something futile with a ton of unearned confidence and fail spectacularly!”

-Michael, 'The Good Place'.

65. “Searching for meaning is philosophical suicide. How does anyone do anything when you understand the fleeting nature of existence?”

-Michael, 'The Good Place'.

66. "Look, dude, this isn't your fault. You've been teaching him ethics for half an hour and he's been evil since the beginning of time."

- Eleanor Shellstrop. 'The Good Place'.

67. "Donna Shellstrop: Listen, baby. Don't be sad, okay? Your father wasn't great. Let's call him what he was. A fart in the shape of a man.

Eleanor Shellstrop: Can you just chill? I don't want to turn dad's funeral into a roast."

- 'The Good Place'.

Here at Kidadl, we have carefully created lots of interesting family-friendly quotes for everyone to enjoy! If you liked our suggestions for 'The Good Place' quotes then why not take a look at these Tom Haverford quotes, or 'How I Met Your Mother' quotes for more?

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Written by Moumita Dutta

Bachelor of Arts specializing in Journalism and Mass Communication, Postgraduate Diploma in Sports Management

Moumita Dutta picture

Moumita DuttaBachelor of Arts specializing in Journalism and Mass Communication, Postgraduate Diploma in Sports Management

A content writer and editor with a passion for sports, Moumita has honed her skills in producing compelling match reports and stories about sporting heroes. She holds a degree in Journalism and Mass Communication from the Indian Institute of Social Welfare and Business Management, Calcutta University, alongside a postgraduate diploma in Sports Management.

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