FOR ALL AGES

20+ Iconic 'A Christmas Story' Quotes For The Festive Season

A Christmas Story' was first released in 1983.

'A Christmas Story' has long been a family favorite Christmas movie since its release in 1983.

Whether you're a nostalgic 80's child or discovering 'A Christmas Story' for the first time, this Christmas movie offers something for everybody. So get into the Christmas spirit with some of the most iconic 'A Christmas Story' movie quotes, we double dog dare you! (Actually make that a triple dog dare!)

Get a taste of this Christmas favorite with some belting Ralphie Parker quotes, amusing Randy Parker quotes, hilarious Christmas story lamp quotes and more fantastic 'A Christmas Story' quotes.

For more quotes from classic Christmas movies take a look at these 'A Christmas Carol' quotes and White Christmas quotes.

Funny Quotes From 'A Christmas Story'

Ralphie is insistent that he wants a model air rifle for his Christmas present much to his mother's dismay.

One of the reasons 'A Christmas Story' remains such a timeless Christmas classic is because of its comedic elements. Indeed, the majority of the humor in 'A Christmas Story' stems from the protagonist Ralphie and his eccentric family, the dynamic between them and the comedic situations arising from their festive celebrations at Christmas. This not only inspires side-splitting moments like the triple dog dare given to Ralphie but also fantastic quotes from the Christmas story, which are still referenced in pop culture today. The 'A Christmas Story' quotes about the leg lamp are so funny, we double dog dare you to share one of these 'A Christmas Story' lines with your family next time you get chatting about Christmas!

1. "Ralphie, you're lucky it didn't cut your eye! Those icicles have been known to kill people."

- Mother Parker.

2. "In the heat of battle, my father wove a tapestry of obscenity, that as far as we know is still hanging in space over Lake Michigan."

- Ralphie.

3. "The Old Man: Don't you touch that! You were always jealous of this lamp.

Mother Parker: Jealous of a plastic...

The Old Man: Jealous! Jealous because I WON.

Mother Parker: That's ridiculous. Jealous. Jealous of WHAT? That is... the ugliest lamp I have ever seen in my entire LIFE!"

4.  "Aunt Clara had for years labored under the delusion that I was not only perpetually 4 years old, but also a girl."

- Ralphie.

5. "He looks like a deranged Easter Bunny."

- The Old Man.

6. "Scut Furkus! What a rotten name! We were trapped. There he stood between us and the alley. Scut Furkus staring out at us with his yellow eyes. He had yellow eyes! SO HELP ME GOD, YELLOW EYES!"

- Ralphie.

7. "Aaah! 'Fra-GEE-Lay!' It Must Be Italian!"

- The Old Man.

8. "Some men are Baptists, others Catholics; my father was an Oldsmobile man."

- Ralphie.

9. "Randy: I can't put my arms down!

Mother Parker: You can put your arms down when you get to school."

10. "Ralphie: [narrating] The old man stood there, quivering with fury, stammering as he tried to come up with a real crusher. All he got out was...

The Old Man: Naddafinga!"

11. "There has never been a kid who didn't believe that he would be stricken blind before he reached twenty-one, and then they'd be sorry."

- Ralphie.

Classic Quotes From 'A Christmas Story'

Ralphie mistakenly believes he has lost an eye when an icicle knocks his glasses off.

Narrated by the adult Ralphie, many of the classic 'A Christmas Story' quotes are predominantly Ralphie quotes. Nonetheless, Ralphie's family and friends also deliver some iconic quotes (including the iconic fragile 'Christmas Story' quote) that you'll love. There are so many great quotes from 'Christmas Story', from the continuous refrain of "you'll shoot your eye out" that follows Ralphie wherever he goes to the irrefutable "triple dog dare" Ralphie must complete.

12. "You'll shoot your eye out."

- Mother Parker.

13.  "Every family has a kid that won’t eat. My little brother had not eaten voluntarily in over three years."

– Ralphie.

14. "Over the years I got to be quite a connoisseur of soap. My personal preference was for Lux, I found that Palmolive had a nice, piquant after-dinner flavor – heady, but with a touch of mellow smoothness. Lifebuoy, on the other hand… (Yechh!)"

- Ralphie.

15. "Schwartz: I triple dog dare ya!

Ralphie: Schwartz created a slight breach of etiquette by skipping the triple dare and going right for the throat!"

16.  "Oh my god, I shot my eye out!"

– Ralphie.

17. "Adults loved to say things like that but kids knew better. We knew darn well it was always better not to get caught."

– Ralphie.

18. "Meatloaf, smeatloaf, double-beatloaf. I hate meatloaf."

- Randy.

19. "Sometimes, at the height of our revelries, when our joy is at its zenith, when all is most right with the world, the most unthinkable disasters descend upon us."

-Ralphie.

20. "Ralphie: I want an Official Red Ryder carbine action two-hundred shot range model air rifle.

Santa Claus: You'll shoot your eye out, kid."

21. "It’s a major award!"

- The Old Man.

22. "Of course! Santa! The big man! The head honcho! The connection! [chuckles] Oh, my mother had truly messed up this time!"

– Ralphie.

Here at Kidadl, we have carefully curated many more family-friendly Christmas film quotes for everyone at home to enjoy this Christmas! If you liked our 22 Best 'A Christmas Story' Quotes (including the 'A Christmas Story Lamp Quotes'!) and are looking for more Christmas quotes, then you might like these 'The Grinch' quotes or Charlie Brown Christmas quotes.

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Kidadl Team

The Kidadl Team is made up of people from different walks of life, from different families and backgrounds, each with unique experiences and nuggets of wisdom to share with you. From lino cutting to surfing to children’s mental health, their hobbies and interests range far and wide. They are passionate about turning your everyday moments into memories and bringing you inspiring ideas to have fun with your family.

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