60+ Christmas Dad Jokes That Are So Bad They're Almost Good

Rajnandini Roychoudhury
Dec 12, 2023 By Rajnandini Roychoudhury
Originally Published on Dec 14, 2020
Edited by Monisha Kochhar
Family celebrating Christmas on Christmas Eve
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Age: 0-99
Read time: 7.1 Min

The time of Christmas is a joyous time in many places and for a lot of people around the world.

Dad jokes are always funny, sometimes bad, but still definitely funny. We assure you that these Christmas dad jokes will make you roll on the floor laughing like a yule log.

Christmas is an annual festival where people commemorate the birth of Jesus Christ on the 25 December. Dad jokes are usually bad yet funny jokes that dads tell the family. Here, we've found the best Christmas dad jokes for you to enjoy. So, have a very merry and funny Christmas, everyone!

Funny Jokes About Christmas Yule Love

Here we have some corny Santa jokes, cheesy holiday jokes, that we know yule love.

1. What do the little helpers of Santa learn when they first go to school? They learn the elf-abets.

2. What does Santa call the snowmen's offspring at the North Pole? Chill-dren.

3. How much did Santa have to pay when he went to buy his sleigh? Nothing. Because it was on the house.

4. What is the best Christmas present you can get anyone? A broken drum because you just can't beat it.

5. Why does Santa always enter a home through the chimney? Probably because it soots him.

6. What's every elf's favorite type of music? It's wrap.

7. Where do Santa and his reindeers stop for coffee between their journeys? They go to Star-bucks.

8. What would you give a dog as a present for Christmas? The best present would be mobile bone.

9. What other name can you call the little helpers belonging to Santa? The subordinate clauses.

10. What are the best Christmas sweaters made from? Fleece Navidad.

11. What happens to Santa if he even gets stuck in a chimney? He's hit with Claustrophobia.

12. What did the reindeer say before he went up to the comedy show to tell a joke? He said, "This one's going to sleigh you."

13. What's the favorite Christmas Carol of every new parent? Silent Night.

14. Why did Santa's helper need to go to a therapist? Probably because he had very low elf-esteem.

15. Why did the Grinch decide to go to the haunted house the other day? Because he was searching for the holiday spirit.

16. What would you call Santa if he went bankrupt? He'd be called Saint Nickel-less.

17. Why do all the Christmas trees like being in the past the most? That's because the present is beneath them.

18. Where do Santa and all his helpers keep their money safely? At the snowbank.

19. Where is Santa's favorite place to deliver presents? It's Idaho-ho-ho.

20. What do all the reindeers hang on the Christmas trees at their home? The horn-aments.

Very Merry Dad Christmas Jokes

Christmas tree decorated with gifts in house interior

This is the list of Christmas dad jokes, bad Christmas jokes, and bad holiday jokes that are so bad that they're actually pretty good.

21. What's the basic difference between the ordinary alphabet and the Christmas alphabet? The Christmas alphabets have no-el.

22. What type of motorbike do Santa and the snowmen love to ride around the city? A Holly Davidson motor icicle.

23. Did you hear that Santa used to learn karate? He has a black belt.

24. What do the little shark kids call the Santa who delivers presents to them? The Santa Jaws.

25. What would you call a reindeer that has an obnoxious personality? Rude-olph.

26. What's the favorite kind of potato chip of Santa and the reindeers? Crisp Pringles.

27. How did Scrooge win the football game? Because the ghost of Christmas passed.

28. Why are all the Christmas trees really bad at sewing clothes? Probably because they have a habit of dropping their needles.

29. What did the beaver say when it saw the Christmas Tree? It said, "Nice gnawing you."

30. Did you hear that Rudolph never went to school? I heard he was elf-taught.

31. Who is Santa's favorite singer? It's Elf-is Presley.

32. Why don't the reindeers like to go to picnics? That's mainly because of their ant-lures.

33. What did Santa ask Rudolph when he wanted to ask about the condition of the weather? He asked, "Do you think it will rain, dear?"

34. What do the elves post on Social Media when they go someplace nice? Their elf-ies.

35. What would you get if you crossed a Christmas special decorative plant and a frog? A mistle-toad.

36. What would you get if you crossed a detective with Santa? The Santa Clues.

37. What would you call a kid that doesn't believe in Santa Claus? He'd be called the rebel without a Claus.

38. How can you tell that Santa is real? You can sense his presents whenever he comes.

39. What is the nationality of Santa Claus? He is North Pole-ish.

40. How does Santa Claus take photos with the good kids? Well, he does it with a Pole-aroid camera.

Christmas Jokes For Kids And Parents

Here you'll find some of the best Christmas jokes for kids and some short Christmas jokes for the entire family to enjoy and laugh along on this festive occasion.

41. Why doesn't Santa Claus ever go to any hospital even if he needs to? Because he always has private elf care.

42. What does Santa loves to eat for breakfast? The Frosted Flakes.

43. What type of cars do the elves of Santa Claus drive? The Toy-otas.

44. What is the best Christmas gift for a person that already has everything? Well, a burglar alarm.

45. What did the gingerbread man use when he had to keep his bed cozy and warm? He used a cookie sheet.

46. What did the doctor say the dad had because he kept eating Christmas decorations? Tinsel-itis.

47. Where does Santa always stay when he goes on any vacation? At the ho-ho-ho-tel.

48. Why is it always really, really cold around the time of Christmas? Probably because it's in the month of Decembrrrrrrrr.

49. Who's Santa Claus's favorite pop star? It's Beyon-sleigh.

50. How does Santa Claus keep track of every fireplace he has already visited? Well, he keeps a log.

51. What do all the elves have to do when they come home after school? They do their gnome work.

52. What did the one snowman say to the other? It said, "Do you also smell carrots?"

53. What animal at Santa's workshop is the wettest? The rain-deer.

54. What is the Christmas carol that you can sing to fruits on the happy event? "Have Yourself A Berry Little Christmas."

55. What did Rudolph have to say about a big book of noses that Santa gifted him? He said, "I already red that one."

56. What is the best Christmas song you can sing to the pet rock you have? 'Rocking Around The Christmas Tree'.

57. Which body part is the only one you can see on Christmas eve? The mistle-toe.

58. Why does Snoop Dogg always love giving gifts to everyone? Probably because he's very good at wrapping.

59. What's Santa Claus's favorite snack? The Ice Krispie treats.

60. What happens when you combine Santa with a duck? A Christmas Quacker.

Knock Knock Jokes About Christmas

In this list, you'll get Christmas knock-knock jokes, some knock-knock jokes about Santa Claus, his little helpers, decorations, cakes, and the entire happy occasion.

61. Knock! Knock!

Who is there?

Noah.

Noah who?

Noah good Christmas day joke?

 

62. Knock! Knock!

Who is there?

Mary.

Mary who?

Mary Christmas to you and your family.

 

63. Knock! Knock!

Who is there?

Chris.

Chris who?

Christmas time is just around the corner.

 

64. Knock! Knock!

Who is there?

Avery.

Avery who?

Avery merry Christmas to you and your close ones.

 

65. Knock! Knock!

Who is there?

Coal.

Coal who?

Coal me when Santa is at the house with presents.

 

66. Knock! Knock!

Who is there?

Santa.

Santa who?

Santa Christmas card to you the other day. Did you get it?

 

67. Knock! Knock!

Who is there?

Howard.

Howard who?

Howard you like to sing some Christmas carols along with me?

 

68. Knock! Knock!

Who is there?

Ima.

Ima who?

Ima dreaming of white Christmas.

 

69. Knock! Knock!

Who is there?

Elf.

Elf who?

Elf me to wrap this present.

 

70. Knock! Knock!

Who is there?

Yule.

Yule who?

Yule be sorry if you don't eat this Christmas fruit cake.

 

71. Knock, knock!

Who’s there?

Mary and Abby.

Mary and Abby who?

Mary Christmas and Abby New Year!

 

72. Knock, knock!

Who’s there?

Murray.

Murray who?

Murray Christmas to all, and to all a good night.

 

73. Knock, knock!

Who’s there?

Ivana.

Ivana who?

Ivana wish you a Merry Christmas.

74. Knock, knock!

Who’s there?

Ho Ho.

Ho Ho who?

Your Santa impression needs a little work!

75. Knock, knock!

Who’s there?

Irish.

Irish who?

Irish you a Merry Christmas!

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Sources

https://thiswestcoastmommy.com/50-best-christmas-knock-knock-jokes/

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Written by Rajnandini Roychoudhury

Bachelor of Arts specializing in English, Master of Arts specializing in English

Rajnandini Roychoudhury picture

Rajnandini RoychoudhuryBachelor of Arts specializing in English, Master of Arts specializing in English

With a Master of Arts in English, Rajnandini has pursued her passion for the arts and has become an experienced content writer. She has worked with companies such as Writer's Zone and has had her writing skills recognized by publications such as The Telegraph. Rajnandini is also trilingual and enjoys various hobbies such as music, movies, travel, philanthropy, writing her blog, and reading classic British literature. 

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