100 Best Canada Jokes And Puns | Kidadl


100 Best Canada Jokes And Puns

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Canada jokes are so polite that you cannot help but laugh at them!

A Canadian joke can include many elements in them. But to understand funny Canada jokes, you must have a great sense of humor!

The best Canada jokes include ice hockey jokes, poutine jokes, Toronto jokes, beaver jokes, maple jokes, ice jokes, and many others. Similarly, puns about Canada will obviously include hockey puns and Canadian one-liners. So, without much ado, let us dive into the world of Canada jokes and puns and Canada one-liners!

If you are interested in more such articles, take a look at Hockey Jokes and Snow Puns.

Funny Canadian Jokes

Canadians are known for their politeness.

A poutine joke, a Toronto joke, or a joke about Nova Scotia are used routinely as part of Canadian polite jokes. Check out some of those unique jokes here.

1. What is the name of the place in Canada that can instantly take you to Brazil? The name of the place is Onta-Rio!

2. What would be the favorite comedy show for Canadians? 'Its Always Snowing in Winnipeg!'

3. What is the name of the American TV show about a Canadian singer? The show is  'Leave it to Bieber!"

4. What are the two seasons predominantly seen in Canada? It is just winter and then July!

5. What would the space program be called when the United States and Canadians collaborate? It would be called the Apollo-G!

6. What is the name of the Canadian show that has young males visit the movie-themed parks? It is the Trailer Park Boys!

7. What is the greatest irony regarding peaceful Canadians? They become violent when their hockey team loses.

8. What is the only place in the world where the United Kingdom and Latin America meet? They meet in British Columbia.

9. Why do Canadians get such a good supply of hard water? This is because most of the water is frozen!

10. What is the type of tire that fixes itself on its own without troubling the driver? It is a Canadian tire.

11. What is the best tourist advert for Canada? 'This is the land where frostbite and sunburn happen in the same week!'

12. What should you call Canada when it fails at something? You call it Can'tada!

13. What is the only place in the world where you can have English and French breakfasts together? You can have them together only in Canada.

14. How does a Canadian confess his love for his crush? "I love you even more than poutine!"

15. Why was the Canadian friend late in reaching the airport? He got delayed because he was poutine in some food!

16. What is the name of the Canadian TV show that everyone loves to watch? The name of the show is 'The Cold & The Beautiful'!

17. What was the time on the clock when the Canadian Prime Minister ate the poutine? It was Eight P.M.!

18. Why couldn't I reach my Canadian friend during an emergency? Because he was watching a game of hockey!

19. In which way is the USA better than Canada? It has nicer neighbors!

20. What is the name of the television show that Canadian traffic police officers love to watch? It is 'The Red Green Show'!

21. What constitutes fifty percent of Canada? The letter A!

22. How did the beaver bid farewell to the maple leaf tree? He said, "It really has been nice gnawing you!"

23. Why are Canadians always encouraging people and giving them belief? Because they love 'Saving Hope'!

24. Why do Canadians love helping people in times of trouble? Because they are Can-aid-ians!

25. What was the name of the sport called hockey before it became so famous in Canada? It was just known as hock!

26. What was my father's reaction when he imported a tree from Canada? He said, "This looks quite oak, eh?

27. Why was my Canadian friend who was in the timber business so muscular and strong? This was because he was lumber jacked!

28. Why are the people in Canada cooler than the rest of the world? Because the weather is always cold.

29. How was the Canadian student kicked out of class? The teacher sat him down and then asked him to leave.

30. What is the name of the city in Canada that is filled with wild cats? It is the city of Van-cougar!

Clever Canada Puns

Take a look at these awesome and intelligent puns about Canada that are funny any time of the day.

31. During the ice hockey game, I tried to sneak into the front of the line, but the guard caught me and told me, "Quebec to the end of the line!"

32. I told my friend that I am not really a Canadian, but I don't know why he was having Nunavut!

33. When my sister told me that she didn't know the capital of Canada, I told her, 'You Ottawa know it!"

34. I wanted to go back to Canada for my vacations, but the immigration officer told me, "Sorry Sir, Yukon-t go back this year!"

35. I was very surprised when I realized that Canada isn't real! It is all mapleleaf!

36. Canadians are emotionally very strong because when they get hurt emotionally, they can get their feelings checked for free!

37. When I heard the news about Canada, I asked my Canadian friend, "Is it Trudeau-t this has happened?'

38. I was invited to Canada by my friends over there because they were planning to have a New Year's part-eh!

39. When someone commits a first-degree murder in Canada, it becomes a 34-degree murder in the US.

40. Canadians usually build their petrol stations around the corner. This is because they love watching 'Corner Gas'!

41. When the Russian President Vladimir Putin visits Canada, he loves eating the poutine!

42. When the Canadian man told him that he was 100 years old, I replied, "I Canada beleaf that you are 100!"

43. When the Canadian friend promised me that he was going to come over for the summer, I told him, "Please don't Quebec on your word!"

44. When the Canadian went for his blood test, the results came out as Eh positive!

45. When the Canadian National Team won the Hockey World Cup, my father commented, "What eh time to be ehlive!"

46. My friend told me a joke about the Canadian Rockies. They were absolutely hill areas!

47. While we were on a hunting trip to Canada, there was this deer that we kept on tracking but couldn't catch. It led us on a wild moose chase!

48. I don't know why the maple syrup is always so sad. Perhaps, because it is so sappy!

49. Whenever I visit Canada, I go to a Tim Horton shop to get myself a cup of latt-eh!

50. A  band of dears released a song in Canada which was a great hit. The name of the band was Moose-h!

Awesome Jokes About Canada

Jokes about Toronto and other cities related to Canada are funny even for a fellow American!

51. Why do people in Canada use BCE instead of BC? Because BCE stands for 'Before Christ, eh?'

52. How can you know that a street hockey player is a Canadian? He is playing the game wearing skates!

53. What is the best type of public transport for Canadians to visit an American? It is none other than the zamboni!

54. Why is Canada the best dam country for storing water resources? This is because beavers are great dam builders!

55. Why are Canadians not allowed to wear sleeveless dresses? This is because they are not permitted to bare arms.

56. Why did the prisoners go to Canada to hide? This was because they had no other place Toronto!

57. What do all the people in the Capital of Canada eat for their breakfast? They eat the Ottawaffles!

58. What happens when you lose your wallet in Canada? You'll get it delivered to your house!

59. For Canadians, what is the first letter of the English alphabet? For them, it is 'Aye'!

60. How many Canadians will it take to change a light bulb? None, because they accept things the way they are!

61. What was the name of the Canadian beaver who became a famous Hollywood actress? Her name was Sigourney Beaver!

62. What was the Canadian skeleton doing at the hockey game? He was there to drive the zam-bone-i!

63. How did my Canadian friend react when I asked him about his native country? He said that was Canada was ehkay!

64. What happened when two Canadian musicians met during the fire at the gaming shop? They formed Arcade Fire!

65. Why is Canada very famous on social media platforms such as Facebook? This is because it has many lakes!

66. What did the brilliant Canadian student get in his test? He got straight Eh's in all his tests!

67. What is the favorite Liam Neeson action movie of many Canadians? It is 'The Eh Team'!

68. How does the Canadian baseball team of Blue Jays get ready before a match? They do regular worm-up sessions!

69. Why shouldn't ice curlers tell Canadian jokes while they are on ice? Because it might crack the ice up!

70. What is the go-to song for a Canadian who is very excited? "Who let Sled Dogs out, who? Who? Who?"

71. What did the snow tell the Rocky Mountains in the winter? "Hey buddy, I've got you covered!"

72. What should be the favorite food item of a Canadian ghost? It has to be boo-tine!

73. Can any Canadian jump higher than the CN Tower? Every Canadian can jump higher than the CN Tower because a tower cannot jump!

74. What does Canada do every time in response to the coin shortage in America? They give us Nickelback!

75. Years ago, where did the Jamaican plant a tree in Canada? He did it in Mon-tree-al!

76. According to doctors, what is the leading liver disease in Canada? It is Hepatitis Eh!

77. Why did Canada add a C to its name in the very beginning? This was because it wanted to add anada letter to its name!

78. How much of Northern Canada can actually be inhabited by humans? Sadly, Nunavit!

79. How do Canadians take care of their hair? They take care of their hair by using moose!

80. Why do uneducated Canadians get more job offers in the US than Americans themselves? This is because 0 degrees in Canada is equivalent to 32 degrees in America!

Awesome Canadian Puns

Wonderful jokes and puns can be made about Canada.

Many puns on Canada can often be used as one-liners or turned into Canada Jokes.

81. There was this person who wanted to smuggle some beavers from Canada. But, the border patrol were having Nunavut.

82. I went to watch a boxing match in Canada and suddenly I saw that a hockey game had broken out!

83. The only way you can get a bunch of Canadian criminals to turn good is by saying to them, "Please, leave this life of crime!"

84. The Canadian paleontologist announced that they had found a new dinosaur from B.C. (British Columbia).

85. My tour guide for Canada told me, "Yukon easily watch the Northern Lights from here!"

86. My brother didn't believe me when I said the name of the Canadian Prime Minister. I replied, "You may not believe me, but it's Trudeau!"

87. I didn't want to visit the lake from the Canadian side of the border, because it was giving me an eerie feeling!

88. People in Alberta love watching this one particular movie. It is called The Adventures of Tarsand!

89. I visited my Canadian friend in winter and greeted him by saying, "It is ice to meet you, buddy!"

90. There is a Canadian group of hackers and cyber activists who fight against animal cruelty. Their name is Anony-moose!

91. The Canadian trip was enjoyed by the entire family, but it cost them deerly!

92. Winter is the moose beautiful time of the year in Canada!

93. I was surprised to see the rate of crime on Canada's east coast is pretty high. It was because the thieves never get cod!

94. I asked my tour guide to make a joke about Canada. He said, "I'm sorry, but I Canada think of any!"

95. Last summer vacation, when I went on a camping trip to Canada, it was really an a-moose-ing experience for me!

96. I wanted to make a joke about the Canadian border, but then I realized that it would cross a line!

97. There was this special type of deer in Canada that would drink human blood. It was called the moose-quito!

98. When I finally decided to open a business in Canada, my advisors told me, "Don't get cod feet!"

99. My professor said that one day Canada will take over the entire world and then we will have to say sorry to Canadians!

100. I was terrified during my trip to North Canada because there were so much tundra and lightning!

Here at Kidadl, we have carefully created lots of great family-friendly jokes and puns for everyone to enjoy! If you liked our suggestions for Canada Jokes then why not take a look at Snow Jokes, or Beaver Jokes.

Rajnandini is an art lover and enthusiastically likes to spread her knowledge. With a Master of Arts in English, she has worked as a private tutor and, in the past few years, has moved into content writing for companies such as Writer's Zone. Trilingual Rajnandini has also published work in a supplement for 'The Telegraph', and had her poetry shortlisted in Poems4Peace, an international project. Outside work, her interests include music, movies, travel, philanthropy, writing her blog, and reading. She is fond of classic British literature.

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