70 Boat Puns That Will Float Your Boat | Kidadl

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70 Boat Puns That Will Float Your Boat

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There may be a lot of funny boat names and sea jokes out there, but as far as we're concerned, nothing beats a good boat pun.

This list of clever boat puns is sure to have you and your friends giggling - some of them make people laugh so much that they even get used as funny boat names. If this list still doesn't get you sea-sick of nautical puns, why not take a look at our ocean puns and crab jokes as well?

Boats are fascinating things, and because the sea can be a dangerous place, lots of superstitions have grown up around boats and sailing. For example, did you know that sailors believe it's unlucky to whistle on a boat or that ships used to keep a cat on board to stop rats from eating all the sailors' food? Boats and ships are often talked about as the same thing, but did you know that a vessel is classified as a ship when it weighs over 500 tonnes? That's why we've called this blog boat puns instead of ship puns - we've not got more than 500 puns, but we think these 41 are enough to get you rolling with laughter.

Funny Boat Puns

A funny pun is a great way to cheer up a friend, so why not share a couple of these?

1. This big speedboat shot past me the other day. Turns out it was Usain Boat.

2. My friend was late for our sailing trip. When she arrived, it was a-boat time.

3. A car ferry sailed past. "That's a ferry impressive boat," shouted the captain.

4. The baby boats are all scared of the boat teacher. She's very stern.

5. This boat tells really good stories. They always have a ferry-tail ending.

6. A brother and sister were arguing about oars in their boat. They were having a row.

7. I got my friend a row boat, but I'd better a-skiff she wants it.

8. There's a sail on at the boat store today.

9. You sa-boat-eur my plan.

10. Boat race team should show some sportsman-ship.

11. I'm knot shore if you noticed, but I'm on a boat.

12. What a boat-iful day!

13. No bullship on the boat.

14. Where do you like boating? Lake oar Sea?

15. Did you guys hear about the boat that got stuck in the Suez canal? Waterway to get stuck!

16. There was a huge sail on boat price!

17. Leaving boating school is sad. I hated saying bye to my piers.

18. Adoring this moment boatloads.

19. What would a boat say when getting bored? I much rudder move at my place.

Ship Puns

Seas-s the day and crack out a funny pun about ships from this list.

20. My sister went round back of the ship. The captain gave her a stern look.

21. Your ship is very polite. It's always got a bow for everyone.

22. This ship is slower than the one with three masts, but we'll get there schooner or later.

23. Two cruise ships were in the harbor. "I'm empty. Where is everyone?" said one. "I haven't got a crew," said the second.

24. This ship keeps banging into rocks. It's cruising for a bruising.

25. 'I don't need this,' said the ferry, looking at a workout poster. 'I'm already shipshape!'

26. A ferryboat came and dropped off a load of meat and cheese at my house. It was a deliferry.

27. To be honest, I don't give a ship.

28. I love my friend-ships.

29. What's up, dock?

30. Angry captain was sent for anchor-management.

31. Titanic was supposed to be an unsinkable ship. But unsinkable happened!

32. I spent my children's college fund on a boat. I'm going to call it the scholarship.

33. How do you fix a broken ship? With a sailor's kit!

34. Arrghh matey, I have ye walkin'the plank!

35. She is anchor-rigible.

36. Where you knotty or nice this year?

37. If a ship starts feeling sick, you might say it's coming down with a case of the sterns.

38. If you want to know what a ship is up to, just ask its stern.

39. What a boat-iful ship!

Canoe Puns

Canoe believe this list of funny puns?

40. I won the rowing championship, canoe believe it?

41. Two canoes passed each other. "Oh, hey," said one. "Water you doing here?"

42. The canoe was annoyed the paddle fell over the side. Getting it back would be an oar-deal.

43. I love kayaking. Canoe think of a better way to spend your time?

44. A canoe asked a tug whether he'd been to the Atlantic. "Oh, no," he replied. "I wouldn't go there. I have very Pacific tastes."

45. I called my canoe's paddle the wrong name. It was very oar-kward.

46. Canoe think of any boating puns?

Three boys wearing life vests as they row on the water in a canoe.

Yacht Puns

If you're all at sea looking for a pun, check out these funny yacht jokes.

47. These boardwalks are upsetting my yacht. She doesn't like mooring here because of the pier pressure.

48. I shouted hello at this fancy-looking ship. "Yacht do you want?" it asked.

49. A yacht moored at the pier. "What's up, dock?" it said.

50. The rowboat used to be the fastest boat in the marina. It's yacht anymore.

51. A rock band's yacht moored then fell over sideways. It liked to dock and roll.

52. This yacht loves to spoil all my puns. He's such a keel-joy.

53. Did you hear about the Yacht builder that had to work from home? His sails went through the roof.

Canal Boat Puns

Excuse us barging in here with another boat pun or two. They'll be worth the read, you'll sea.

54. The other boats think the canal boat's pushy. He keeps barging through them.

55. The canal boat kept ruining all the other boats' plans. She was a sa-boat-eur.

56. A barge and a speedboat left on a trip. The barge arrived, but the speedboat wasn't there. "I guess she took the sea-nic route," he said.

57. The canal boat was a mess after the storm. He looked like a wreck.

58. This poor barge feels sick. It'll have to go to the dock.

59. If Kim Jong-un had a private yacht, it would be a dictator ship.

Sailing Puns

If you're feeling like a fish out of water with all these boats, here are our best sailing puns instead.

60. We had a party on our boat the other day. It was a sail-abration.

61. My anchor rope started talking to me, so I asked if it was a person now. 'I'm a frayed knot,' it replied.

62. Buoy, that big thing floating in the water sure is red.

63. We weren't planning to go sailing, but we decided to seas the day.

64. Do you want to go sailing? Where? Sea, señor. Sea.

65. A rope asked if it was getting a Christmas present. 'Depends if you're knotty or nice,' the sailor replied.

66. A man kept walking around the harbor, sticking poles on the boats. He was the harbor mast-er.

67. A kid put a tied-up piece of rope on a sailor's wrist. 'Knot on my watch!' the sailor shouted. 'That's knot funny.'

68. 'Why is the anchor on that scale?' shouted the captain. 'You told me to weigh anchor,' said the sailor.

69. I tried to come up with a sailing pun, but it all went over my head.

70. I really wanted to set sail, but I just couldn't get my boat together.

Written By
Jennie Hughes

Jennie is a Manchester native who discovered a love of teaching and travel whilst teaching at a kindergarten in China, and has spent her time since then becoming an expert in both. Jennie mainly teaches KS2 children and still thinks she has the best job in the world. She also runs a tutoring and mindfulness company called ‘Recreate-U’ which helps people to reach their full educational potential through making them feel comfortable, safe, and happy in their learning environment. In her spare time she can be found up to her elbows in a craft project or curled up somewhere comfy with a book and a hot cup of tea.

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