30 Time Puns That Are Hilariously Funny

Cora Lydon
Dec 12, 2023 By Cora Lydon
Originally Published on Oct 16, 2020
Fact-checked by Isobel Murphy
Clock covered by child's hands and colorful wooden blocks with omitted day of week words
Age: 0-99
Read time: 3.7 Min

There's always time for a funny pun or two, especially when you're making clocks, watches, hours or minutes the star of your jokes.

But while there's plenty of laughs to be had on the topic of time it's also a serious business. Did you know, for example, that at the top of Mount Everest a year would be around 15 microseconds shorter than a year experienced at sea level?

Ever heard of the strontium atomic clock? It's found in America and is the most accurate clock to have ever been built. Scientists say it will be accurate within a second for more than 15 billion years.

Ready for a few jokes? Read on for some giggles and a pun or two to pass the time and if you're still looking for more laughs have a look at these space puns and these rock puns.

Time Travelling Funny Puns

Here are some more wonderfully funny puns you may like.

1. I heard a great time travel joke tomorrow.

2. I was voted 'Most likely to travel back in time, class of 2056'.

3. I was thinking about an old car I owned that got stuck in reverse gear. That took me back.

4. Light travels faster than sound. Turns out that's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

5. When the past, present and future go camping they always argue. It's intense tense in tents.

Sand running through the bulbs of an hourglass measuring the passing time

Clock Watching Time Puns

We're sure you'll find an ageless pun in amongst this selection.

6. A friend bought me a watch for my birthday, but it stopped working the second day. I've not told them yet. It's never the right time.

7. 11:59:59 is my favourite time of day - it's second to noon.

8. I held my wristwatch up to the mirror. It was time for reflection.

9. Yesterday I bought six watches. You could say I have a lot of time on my hands.

10. I got a new 24-hour clock yesterday and it's broken already. It only lasted a day.

11. How can you tell when your clock is really hungry? It goes back four seconds.

12. A man I know tried to make a belt out of watches. It was a waist of time.

13. 6:30 is the best time, hands down.

14. The wristwatch didn't believe the story the clock was telling it. It was second hand information.

15. Whatever you do, don't tick off the clock.

16. The man across the street is always sitting on his clock. He says he wanted to be on time.

More Time One-Liners And Puns

We hope you like one of these top giggles, why not share your favourite funny pun with friends?

17. My sister has taken up eating watches, but it takes a while to get through each one. It's time consuming.

18. My neighbour was always late until he started sleeping in his herb garden. Now he wakes up on thyme.

19. I keep meaning to look for my missing watch but I can never find the time.

20. I say, they're finally making a movie about clocks. It's about time.

21. Our dog is called Rolex. He's a watch dog.

22. My clock at home stopped working. Turns out it just needed a hand to get going.

23. I always take my watch off before sharing a secret. Because time will tell.

24. The book on chronology I ordered has finally arrived in the mail. It's about time.

25. My best friend and I played hide and seek today. It went on for hours. Good friends are hard to find.

Career In Time Puns

We've got more jokes here about the art of making time; remember there's always time for a good pun.

26. I wanted to do some over time at work. So I put the clock under my desk.

27. I asked the boss if I could leave early and he said yes as long as I made up the time. I said 'sure, it's half past 13'.

28. If I wanted to have the time of my life I'd work in a clock factory.

29. The robber broke into the clock shop and shouted 'hands up'.

30. I can't believe I got fired from the watch factory after all the extra hours I put in.

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Written by Cora Lydon

Bachelor of Arts specializing in Literature

Cora Lydon picture

Cora LydonBachelor of Arts specializing in Literature

With a passion for inspiring her children, Cora is a journalist with a Bachelor's degree in Literature from the University of Suffolk. She is also a children's book author living in Suffolk. She enjoys seeking out creative activities and places for her family to explore, often resulting in messy crafts at the dining table.

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Fact-checked by Isobel Murphy

Bachelor of Arts specializing in History

Isobel Murphy picture

Isobel MurphyBachelor of Arts specializing in History

With a love for exploring cities and finding outdoor spaces to enjoy, Isobel has spent her life exploring various cities in the UK, from her hometown of Surrey to Birmingham where she studied history for three years. She is passionate about sports and enjoys watching and playing, as well as baking and spending quality time with her loved ones.

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