40+ Best Tony Soprano Quotes And One Liners From The Hit HBO Series

Divya Raghav
Dec 12, 2023 By Divya Raghav
Originally Published on Jan 22, 2021
Edited by Isobel Murphy
Tony Soprano statue on train station
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Read time: 6.3 Min

Tony Soprano, played by the versatile actor James Gandolfini, is the Street Boss of the DiMeo crime family in the Primetime Emmy award-winning show, 'The Sopranos'.

Being the Street Boss of the most dominant crime syndicate, it's Tony's job to keep their criminal operations functioning smoothly while maintaining harmony among their peers. The actual boss is his uncle Corrado "Junior" Soprano but, has little to no power except for being the face of the organization.

James Gandolfini, who plays Tony, performs his role magnificently as the Street Boss who jumps back and forth between good and evil with his chaotic character. Somedays, Tony Soprano is a man with anger issues, emotional disconnection, and someone who finds most of his solutions to any problems, in violence.

And the other days, he's seemingly heroic, helping, loving, humorous, and charming.

Its this complexity of the character which has earned him his popularity among the viewers as it keeps them guessing. Overall, even the supporting cast does a great job of carrying the show, as some of 'The Sopranos' best lines are from the supporting characters.

'The Sopranos' quotes are sure to encourage you to rewatch the series if you're an old fan, or get you intrigued enough to try it for the first time. After which, if you're looking for more quotes, check out these ['The Sopranos' quotes] and [Walter White quotes].

Famous Tony Soprano Quotes That Are Fan Favorites

These James Gandolfini quotes are also the Tony Soprano best quotes to get you introduced to the world of 'The Sopranos'.

1. "Even a broken clock is right twice a day."

-Tony Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

2. "A wrong decision is better than indecision."

-Tony Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

3. "We're soldiers. Soldiers don't go to hell."

-Tony Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

4. "Those who want respect, give respect."

-Tony Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

5. "I like people who don't need everyone to like them."

-Tony Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

6. "You're only religious when it suits you."

-Tony Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

7. "Sometimes it's important to give people the illusion of being in control."

-Tony Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

8. "Someday soon, you're gonna have families of your own and if you're lucky, you'll remember the little moments like this, that we're good."

-Tony Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

9. " All due respect, you got no idea what it’s like to be Number One. Every decision you make affects every facet of every other thing. It's too much to deal with almost. And in the end, you're completely alone with it all."

-Tony Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

10. "If you can quote the rules, then you can obey them."

-Tony Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

Funny 'Sopranos' Quotes To Cheer Your Day

Here we bring you some of the best 'Sopranos' jokes including some funny Tony Soprano quotes, Dr Jennifer Melfi quotes and Paulie Gualtieri lines, who has some of the funniest 'Sopranos' quotes.

11. "She's so fat, she goes campin', the bears have to hide their food."

-Paulie Gualtieri, 'The Sopranos'.

12. "Oh, look at that! It's like an ad for a weight loss center. Before, and way before!"

-Paulie Gualtieri, 'The Sopranos'.

13. "Tony Soprano: I think it's time for you to start to seriously consider salads.

Bobby Baccilieri: What do you mean?

Tony Soprano: What do I mean? I mean get off my car before you flip it over."

- 'The Sopranos'.

14. "Dr. Jennifer Melfi: What line of work are you in?

Tony Soprano: Waste management consultant."

- 'The Sopranos'.

15. "Hi, my name is J.T., I'm an alcoholic and an addict. I'm also a TV writer, which by default makes me a douchebag."

-J.T. Dolan, 'The Sopranos'.

Film reel, lens and movie clapper

Livia Soprano Quotes From 'The Sopranos'

Tony Soprano's mother Livia Soprano is not the best mother one could have, but her character makes for some great television.

16. "Water.. water… water! I'm livin' next door to Gunga Din!"

-Livia Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

17. "Daughters are better at taking care of their mothers than sons."

-Livia Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

18. "Only if I'm picked up and brought back home. I don't drive when they're predicting rain."

-Livia Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

19. "I wish the Lord would take me now."

-Livia Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

20. "Janice, how do you open this Eee-Advil? Oh, nevah mind."

-Livia Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

Junior Soprano Quotes To Leave You In Your Thoughts

Here are a few notable quotes by Junior Soprano along with some funny Junior Soprano jokes.

21. "Keep thinking you know everything. Some people are so far behind in a race that they actually think they’re leading."

-Junior Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

22. "My father told me to never get old. I should have listened to him."

-Junior Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

23. "What the hell would we have in common? Bunions? You know how I feel about feet."

-Junior Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

24. "Livia: It's not easy being abandoned, is it?

Junior: Look to yourself."

- 'The Sopranos'.

25. "That’s what being a boss is. You steer the ship the best way you know. Sometimes it’s smooth. Sometimes you hit the rocks."

-Junior Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

The Best 'Sopranos' Quotes By Supporting Characters

Some of the best 'Soprano' quotes include Christopher Moltisanti quotes and Carmela Soprano quotes.

26. "Pours you a drink with one hand. Judges you with the other if you take it."

-Christopher Moltisanti, 'The Sopranos'.

27. "Carmela: Look at you at girls soccer, Tony.

Tony: What do you want from me? My only son's a couch potato."

- 'The Sopranos'.

28. "In my thoughts, I used a technique of positive visualization. How come I always feel undermined?"

-Christopher Moltisanti, 'The Sopranos'.

29. "Carmela: What if something should happen?

Tony: You dig out my blue suit, you call up old man Coletti, and tell him not to put too much makeup on my face."

- 'The Sopranos'.

30. "You ever feel like nothin’ good was ever gonna happen to you?"

-Christopher Moltisanti, 'The Sopranos'.

Popular 'Sopranos' Sayings And 'Sopranos' One Liners

Check out some of the best Tony Soprano lines and 'Soprano' phrases including Tony Soprano quotes about family here.

31. "It's good to be in something from the ground floor. I came too late for that and I know. But lately, I'm getting the feeling that I came in at the end. The best is over."

-Tony Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

32. "Dr. Melfi: Some people take pleasure in the simple doing of things.

Tony: The things I take pleasure in, I can't do."

- 'The Sopranos'.

33. "I don’t care how close you are, in the end, your friends are gonna let you down. Family: they’re the only ones you can depend on."

-Tony Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

34. "Oh, poor baby. What do you want, a Whitman Sampler?"

-Tony Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

35. "Other people's definitions of you, sometimes they’re more about making themselves feel better. You gotta define yourself."

-Christopher Moltisanti, 'The Sopranos'.

36. "You got any idea what my life would be worth if certain people found out I checked into a laughing academy?"

-Tony Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

37. "Teddy Roosevelt once gave an entire speech with a bullet lodged in his chest. Some things are just a matter of duty."

-Junior Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

38. "Sometimes we’re all hypocrites"

-Meadow Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

39. "I find I have to be the sad clown: laughing on the outside, crying on the inside."

-Tony Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

40. "Buy land, 'cause God ain't making any more of it."

-Tony Soprano, 'The Sopranos'.

Here at Kidadl, we have carefully created lots of interesting family-friendly quotes for everyone to enjoy! If you liked our suggestions for the best Tony Soprano Quotes and one-liners from the hit HBO series, then why not take a look at these ['The Wire' quotes], or [funny tv quotes] for more?

Main image credit: solomonphotos / Shutterstock.com

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Written by Divya Raghav

Bachelor of Commerce specializing in Accounting and Finance, Master of Business Administration

Divya Raghav picture

Divya RaghavBachelor of Commerce specializing in Accounting and Finance, Master of Business Administration

With a diverse range of experience in finance, administration, and operations, Divya is a diligent worker known for her attention to detail. Born and raised in Bangalore, she completed her Bachelor's in Commerce from Christ University and is now pursuing an MBA at Narsee Monjee Institute of Management Studies, Bangalore. Along with her professional pursuits, Divya has a passion for baking, dancing, and writing content. She is also an avid animal lover who dedicates her time to volunteering for animal welfare causes.

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