71 Jimmy Fallon Quotes From The Hilarious Television Host

Jimmy Fallon is one of the best celebrated late-night hosts and comedians who is famous for being a cast member of 'e'.

He is also known for being the host of two of the most famous late-night shows 'The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon' and 'Late Night With Jimmy Fallon'. He has also starred in several films such as 'Taxi' and 'Fever Pitch'.

A talented singer, hilarious comedian, and all in all a gem of a famous human being, he has successfully lightened the hearts of fans all over the world with his funny and interesting Jimmy Fallon quotes. Here is a list of some of the best quotes by Jimmy Fallon.

If you like these Jimmy Fallon quotes, you can check out these Stuart Smalley quotes from 'Saturday Night Live' and Chris Farley quotes too.

Jimmy Fallon One-Liners And Quotes

Ready to discover the best Jimmy Fallon quotes? Here's a list of Jimmy Fallon 'Late Night' one-liners and more great Jimmy Fallon quotes.

1. "When I see professional clowns, mimes, or people who make ballon animals, I think of their relatives and how disappointed they must be."

-Jimmy Fallon.

2. "Be silly. You're allowed to be silly. There's nothing wrong with it."

-Jimmy Fallon.

3. "The one thing you shouldn't do is try to tell a cab driver how to get somewhere."

-Jimmy Fallon.

4. "Thank you… motion sensor hand towel machine, you never work, so I just end up looking like I’m waving hello to a wall robot."

-Jimmy Fallon.

5. "Just listen to people and react to what they are saying."

-Jimmy Fallon.

6. "Don’t keep reaching for the stars because you’ll just look like an idiot stretching that way for no reason."

-Jimmy Fallon.

7. "Have fun is my message."

-Jimmy Fallon.

8. "Thank you, yard sales, for being the perfect way to say to your neighbors: 'We think we're important enough to charge money for our garbage.'"

-Jimmy Fallon.

9. "Thank you, hard taco shells, for surviving the long journey from factory, to supermarket, to my plate and then breaking the moment I put something inside you. Thank you."

-Jimmy Fallon.

10. "Thank you, people who say ‘Wow, you’re really photogenic,’ for not saying what you really mean: 'Wow, you’re really ugly in person.'"

-Jimmy Fallon.

11. "Thank you... fantasy football draft, for letting me know that even in my fantasies, I am bad at sports."

-Jimmy Fallon.

12. "You only think of the best comeback when you leave."

-Jimmy Fallon.

13. "... you need to just keep doing what you love doing."

-Jimmy Fallon.

14. "Say, didn’t Andy Warhol do the Rolling Stones tongue?"

-Jimmy Fallon.

15. "I heard this great story about Andy [Warhol] - that he wanted to open a restaurant where you weren’t allowed to bring anyone. People would have to sit by themselves and eat. There would be just one chair at each table."

-Jimmy Fallon.

Jimmy Fallon Funny Quotes

Here's a list of some of the best Jimmy Fallon quotes that might make you laugh.

16. "Life is like a clam. When it opens, you gotta grab the gooey stuff."

-Jimmy Fallon.

17. "When I first started growing it, it was patchy and weird looking. People with real beards would look at me and say, 'Nice try.'"

-Jimmy Fallon.

18. "I did the Tarzan sketch from 'Beyond The Fringe' with Eric Idle last year at a benefit for Dudley Moore at Carnegie Hall. I got completely into 'Beyond The Fringe' after that."

-Jimmy Fallon.

19. "Everyone’s got the Campbell’s cans. They’re everywhere. They’re like Starbucks."

-Jimmy Fallon.

20. "I love British humor."

-Jimmy Fallon.

21. "You know, I got to see one of the Campbell’s soup paintings at somebody’s house once, and I was really psyched, but then I realized he did a zillion of them."

-Jimmy Fallon.

22. "Oh, John’s growing his beard—it’s winter. It’s like, come on, can’t he just wear a sweater? I mean, this isn’t the mountain times, where you need it to be warm. Wear a scarf!"

-Jimmy Fallon.

23. "Sometimes I wish I had a terrible childhood, so that at least I’d have an excuse."

-Jimmy Fallon.

24. "You’re human, you’re not a bear!"

-Jimmy Fallon.

25. "I could do, uh, impressions. What do we do here? I could think of something. Cut to Justin Timberlake, please. Just wink at me or something."

-Jimmy Fallon.

26. "Welcome to the Golden Globes! Already the TelePrompter is down, so this is a great way to start the show."

-Jimmy Fallon.

27. "I didn’t act like I was there. I just got into the story."

-Jimmy Fallon.

28. "Thank you… Apple, for adding a camera to the iPod Nano. Now it’s just like the iPhone except it can’t make calls. So basically, it’s just like the iPhone."

-Jimmy Fallon.

29. "Well, if I can do anything as remotely funny as this, I should do it."

-Jimmy Fallon.

30. "Thank you… pre-season football, for having all the excitement, commercials, and time-outs of the regular season, but with none of the mattering."

-Jimmy Fallon.

Jimmy Fallon Greatest Quotes

Here is a list of some of the best quotes by Jimmy Fallon including Jimmy Fallon mom quotes, Jimmy Fallon dad quotes, and other funny quotes that are simply hilarious.

31. "We’re here! This is what happens at the Golden Globes... It’s already like a GIF. "

-Jimmy Fallon.

32. "I got to 'Saturday Night Live' where my boss has unbelievable N.Y. Yankees tickets, so he invites us to the games."

-Jimmy Fallon.

33. "L.A., it's nice, but I think of sunshine and people on rollerblades eating sushi."

-Jimmy Fallon.

34. "You might remember ‘Manchester By The Sea’ for being the only thing from 2016 that was more depressing than 2016."

-Jimmy Fallon.

35. "'Game Of Thrones' is nominated tonight, how great is that? The show has so many plot twists and choppy moments, a lot of people have wondered what it would’ve been like if King Joffrey had lived. Well, in 12 days, we’re gonna find out."

-Jimmy Fallon.

36. "Just hit your mark and believe what you say."

-Jimmy Fallon.

37. "You can’t reinvent the wheel."

-Jimmy Fallon.

38. "This is the Golden Globes, one of the few places left where America still honors the popular vote."

-Jimmy Fallon.

39. "I know how much work goes into every movie, every TV show, all the music, so let’s make tonight a celebration."

-Jimmy Fallon.

40. "Amazon did pretty well tonight. Eleven nominations. Jeff Bezos is here tonight. He actually arrived yesterday, but there was no one around to to sign for him. It’s an Amazon joke."

-Jimmy Fallon.

41. "A 99-year-old man is filing for divorce from his 96-year-old wife, making them the world’s oldest divorced couple. It’s got to be weird when a divorce lawyer is fighting for your kids to get custody of you."

-Jimmy Fallon.

42. "It’s the biggest party of the year!"

-Jimmy Fallon.

43. "Leno, Conan. They are both really funny. They really know how to land one."

-Jimmy Fallon.

44. "I think I'd always let myself off the hook."

-Jimmy Fallon.

45. "Of course, we all know Matt Damon from his greatest acting role, telling Ben Affleck that he liked Batman vs. Superman. I liked it."

-Jimmy Fallon.

The Most Famous Jimmy Fallon Quotes

Here is a list of some of the most popular quotes by Jimmy Fallon.

46. "It’s like playing poker against myself. There is no way I can lose."

-Jimmy Fallon.

47. "New York, I think of nighttime, I think of Times Square and Broadway and nightlife and the city that never sleeps."

-Jimmy Fallon.

48. "There's always going to be someone out there... who doesn't believe in you or who thinks your head is too big or you're not smart enough."

-Jimmy Fallon.

49. "I wanted to be the next Dana Carvey. This was my ultimate goal."

-Jimmy Fallon.

50. "I do entire music videos in my bedroom, where I used to stand in front of my television memorizing the moves to Michael Jackson’s 'Beat It.'"

-Jimmy Fallon.

51. "I like talking to me. This is actually therapeutic."

-Jimmy Fallon.

52. "I like to annoy myself."

-Jimmy Fallon.

53. "Listening is more important than talking."

-Jimmy Fallon.

54. "I like doing energetic things."

-Jimmy Fallon.

55. "I just want to lie down and have somebody make me laugh for an hour. Entertain me, and then I'm going to sleep with a smile on my face. That's my job; that's what I do."

-Jimmy Fallon.

56. "I’m a glutton for punishment."

-Jimmy Fallon.

57. "I just feel like people like a little break. Especially at 12:37 at night, you go, like, 'I'm just tired of the snarky right now.'"

-Jimmy Fallon.

58. "I'm funnier when I’m in a bad mood."

-Jimmy Fallon.

59. " The Tonight Show didn’t seem like an actual job that you could have."

-Jimmy Fallon.

60. "Sometimes in a movie, the lines are so perfect."

-Jimmy Fallon.

61. "I like video games, I like tech, I like being positive."

-Jimmy Fallon.

62. "Anything I learned was just work hard, just keep working and don't worry about the outside stuff. Whatever happens will happen."

-Jimmy Fallon.

63. "You don't think The Tonight Show is risk free. Especially when you saw what happened with your buddy Conan O’Brien."

-Jimmy Fallon.

64. "I think it's probably one of the reasons people become mailmen. You also get to drive in that vehicle that should be illegal in the United States, where the steering wheel is on the other side. They have no rules! They are the punk rock of government jobs."

-Jimmy Fallon.

65. "I loved how Dad wore a tie and got a car. I didn’t know if all those things came together. I’d see my dad go off to work and we’d wait for him to come home, and we’d all be excited to see him."

-Jimmy Fallon.

66. "My dream was to grow up and get a job at IBM, like my dad. That seemed like a logical dream."

-Jimmy Fallon.

67. "All you remember is you watched Johnny Carson, and you never thought he would retire... I thought he would live forever."

-Jimmy Fallon.

68. "There’s going to be a kid out there somewhere asking their parents, 'Can I stay up late to watch Jimmy Fallon?' Don’t ever forget that."

-Jimmy Fallon.

69. "And at the end of the day you have to live with yourself. I like living with myself. I mean obviously, because here I am interviewing myself."

-Jimmy Fallon.

70. "For me, it's always been do your work, work as hard as you can, and try to make everything the best you can do."

-Jimmy Fallon.

71. "I am ready to apply to the post office."

-Jimmy Fallon.

Here at Kidadl, we have carefully created lots of interesting family-friendly quotes for everyone to enjoy! If you liked our suggestions for Jimmy Fallon quotes then why not take a look at these Gilda Radner quotes and comedian quotes too?