70 Sports Puns And Jokes That Are All Winners

Rajnandini Roychoudhury
Jan 24, 2024 By Rajnandini Roychoudhury
Originally Published on Dec 07, 2020
Edited by Monisha Kochhar
Red treadmill at the stadium with the numbering from one to seven.
Age: 0-99
Read time: 8.0 Min

Sports is a great form of entertainment as well as passion and profession for a lot of people.

As thoroughly entertaining sports usually is, it should also be a necessity for people of all ages. To make and maintain a healthy life and body, sports is the best way to go.

There are at the very least 8000 different kinds of sports around the world. There are indoor games, outdoor games, ball games, and many more. Sports has always provided comfort and leisure to people when they needed it and in today's time, a huge amount of the population's careers also depend upon it. While soccer or European Football is the most famous sport around the world at the moment, every country has sports they're individually good at and it affects so much that every country has their very own national sports. So, sprint away, run and jump through these sports puns and one-liners of ours and laugh your heart to a happy and healthy life.

You could also take a look at 50 Best Football Jokes That Will Make The Crowd Go Wild and 41 Tennis Jokes For Kids That Are Ace

Funny Sports Puns That'll Make You Cheer-y

Here we have some of the funniest sports puns and best one-liners that include some puns about coaches, football puns, baseball puns and so many more puns about all your favorite sports.

1. Cinderella always got kicked off of the girls' lacrosse team. Probably because she had the habit of running away from the ball.

2. I was thinking of opening a Fast Food restaurant and its theme would be the NBA. I'll be naming it Shake-Shaq.

3. I recently heard about a referee who got fired from his job at the NBA. He was supposedly a whistleblower.

4. You can't possibly play any soccer in a jungle. There are just too many cheetahs.

5. Ghosts always play a particular position when they're playing soccer. It's as the Ghoulie.

6. The soccer player brought some strings to the soccer game. He probably wanted to tie up the match.

7. There's a way one can easily light up a soccer stadium. That's with a soccer match.

8. A dinosaur scored a goal the other day in the soccer match. Everyone was calling it dino-score.

9. The soccer player that always keeps the field neat and tidy is the sweeper.

10. The difference between a bad playing soccer team and a tea bag is that the tea bag stays in a cup longer.

11. Grasshoppers don't usually watch soccer. Because instead, they watch cricket.

12. Hockey players are really good at making friends. It's probably because they're quite quick at breaking the ice.

13. Canadians have always beaten the Germans in hockey. That's because Germans bring the wurst, but Canadians bring their "eh" game.

14. Hockey rinks are always rounded because if they were 90 degrees then the ice would melt.

15. The other day a boy climbed up a maple tree with a hockey stick in his hand. Probably because he wanted to join the Toronto Maple Leafs.

16. A magician and a hockey player have one similarity. It's that they both can do hat tricks.

17. Every football player goes to a particular place when they want to buy new uniforms. They go to New Jersey.

18. One day a tiny ghost was asked to join the local football team. It's because they all needed a bit of team spirit.

19. The All-Star football player couldn't really listen to any music. Because be broke all of the records.

20. All football players prefer one particular kind of drink. It's penal-tea.

21. All the fish refused to play basketball. Because they were afraid of the net.

22. One baseball player can hold water the best. It's the pitcher.

23. I was in our gym the other day and thought of jumping on the treadmill. But people were giving me really weird looks. So I decided to start jogging instead.

24. The boating store in our area was having a big sale the other day on canoes. It was quite an oar deal.

25. A baseball team and a pancake have one similarity. It's that they both need good batters.

26. All the waiters are really good at one particular sport. It's tennis because they're good at serving.

27. Baseball players have the ability to stay quite cool. It's probably because they always sit next to their fans.

28. Tarzan used to spend a lot of time on a golf course. It's because he wanted to perfect his swings.

29. I couldn't remember at all how to throw boomerangs. But well eventually, it just came back to me.

30. I've decided to participate in a competition of stair climbing. I guess I'll definitely have to step up my game.

Best Sporting Jokes To Make Your Adrenaline Rush

Top View of a male swimmer swimming in pool.

In this list, you'll find some of the best and funny sports jokes including some jokes about coaches, jokes about basketball, golf, hockey and many more.

31. How do lacrosse players deliver their messages? They do it by Air Mail.

32. Why did the soccer ball decide to quit the team? Well, he became tired of getting kicked around.

33. Which goalie has the ability to jump higher than any crossbar? All of them do. Because crossbars can't really jump.

34. Why are all the soccer players good at math? Because they all know how to make use of their heads.

35. Why are hockey players like goldfish? You could tap on the glass and you'd get their attention.

36. What would you give any hockey player when they demand to get paid? A check.

37. What would you get if you cross a carpet and a quarterback? A throw rug.

38. Why didn't the defensive end pass his tests? Because he was the tackling dummy.

39. What gets harder to catch as you keep running faster? Your breath.

40. What's the similarity between a football team and scrambled eggs? It's that they both have been beaten.

41. What would you call a football player that has long legs and who builds houses? They'd be called a car-punter.

42. Why did the football coach have to go back to the bank? To get his quarterback.

43. Why are all the frogs really good at basketball? It's because they can always make jump shots.

44. What would you name it if you had a basketball-playing shark? It'd be called Sharq.

45. What would you call a monkey who has won back to back titles? A Chimpion.

46. What would you name it if you created a fantasy show that was about basketball? I'd probably call it Hoopernatural.

47. Why did the basketball player sit on the sidelines and start drawing chickens? Because the coach told him that he needed to learn to draw fouls.

48. If basketball players get athlete's foot, then what do astronauts get? They get missile toes.

49. Which fast-food chain has the most chance to win basketball tournaments? The Dunkin' Donuts.

50. Why are all the basketball players the messiest eaters? It's because they're always dribbling.

51. Why do baseball games happen at night? It's because bats usually sleep during the day.

52. What is the main rule for zebra baseball? It's 'three stripes and you're out.'

53. Why shouldn't you ever date any tennis player? Because love doesn't mean anything to them.

54. Why was the golfer wearing two pairs of pants to the game? She did it in case she got any holes in any one of them.

55. Why were the basketball players sent to jail? It's because they shot the ball.

56. What is the favorite letter of any golfer? Tee.

57. Why is tennis a really loud sport? It's because the players raise quite a racket.

58. What happens to be the hardest part when it comes to skydiving? It's the ground.

59. What are you going to do if someone asked for a donation for your local swimming pool? I'd give them a glass of water.

60. What would you call a boat that is full of well behaved and polite football players? It'd be called a good sportsman ship.

Knock Knock Athletic Jokes

Here you'll find some funny and good sports jokes for kids that are just some simple knock knock jokes. Kids will surely love these.

61. Knock! Knock!

Who is there?


Harvey who?

Harvey playing this game forever?


62. Knock! Knock!

Who is there?


Andy who?

Andy winner of today's game is…


63. Knock! Knock!

Who is there?


Fred who?

Fred I can't come to play today.


64. Knock! Knock!

Who is there?

It's Scold.

Scold who?

Scold enough out there that we could go ice skating.


65. Knock! Knock!

Who is there?


Canoe who?

Canoe you come over to play?


66. Knock! Knock!

Who is there?

It's Dozen.

Dozen who?

Dozen anyone in this city play any soccer?


67. Knock! Knock!

Who is there?


Amy who?

The team's always Amy for the top.


68. Knock! Knock!

Who is there?

I'm Meow.

Meow who?

Take meow to that soccer game.


69. Knock! Knock!

Who is there?


Adelia who?

Adelia some cards and we will play poker.


70. Knock! Knock!

Who is there?


Les who?

Les go and play some basketball.

Here at Kidadl, we have carefully created lots of great family-friendly puns for everyone to enjoy! If you liked our suggestions for sports puns & jokes then why not take a look at 40 Best Rugby Jokes That Will Tackle You To The Ground, or for something different take a look at 16 Watermelon Puns That Will Make You Lose Your Rind.

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Written by Rajnandini Roychoudhury

Bachelor of Arts specializing in English, Master of Arts specializing in English

Rajnandini Roychoudhury picture

Rajnandini RoychoudhuryBachelor of Arts specializing in English, Master of Arts specializing in English

With a Master of Arts in English, Rajnandini has pursued her passion for the arts and has become an experienced content writer. She has worked with companies such as Writer's Zone and has had her writing skills recognized by publications such as The Telegraph. Rajnandini is also trilingual and enjoys various hobbies such as music, movies, travel, philanthropy, writing her blog, and reading classic British literature. 

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