16 Best Watermelon Puns That Will Make You Lose Your Rind

Mina Frost
Dec 12, 2023 By Mina Frost
Originally Published on Aug 20, 2020
Happy boys lying on the grass on their tummies making a smile with a slice of watermelon.
Age: 0-99
Read time: 3.0 Min

What's the best way of cooling down when it's hot outside? Sitting down comfortably with some fruit punch and telling your children a watermelon pun or two! Belly laughs are guaranteed with these melon puns.

Before we begin, here are some great fun facts to teach your children: did you know that watermelons are over 92% water (the remaining 6% is sugar) and that there are over 1,000 species of watermelon? Below is a list of the best watermelon puns, quotes and jokes related to melons to make your whole family laugh out loud.

As well as being a delicious, refreshing fruit, it turns out watermelons are extremely conducive to comedy.

If your children are in the mood for more hilariously funny jokes, check out these Apple-solutely Hilarious Apple Jokes! For more refreshing summery jokes, have a read of these amazing Water Puns that will have you crying with laughter.

Watermelon Puns

Girl in a pink top with a watermelon collar eating a slice of juicy watermelon.

This list of funny puns is really one in a melon... And they're all related to fruit!

Why are watermelons the saddest fruit? Because they're melon-cholic!

What did the watermelon say to its boyfriend or girlfriend? You're one in a melon!

A watermelon proposes to its sweetheart: "Honeydew want to get married?" "Oh yes", she replies, "but we cantaloupe!"

Watermelon Jokes

laughs are guaranteed with these melon puns

These question and answer jokes are sure to make the whole family rind their gears to find the answers! Ask your kids the question and wait for them to rack their brains. If they can't figure it out, reveal the answer!

What is the only time you start at the red and stop at the green? When you eat a watermelon!

Why did the cantaloupe jump into the pool? It wanted to be a watermelon.

How are a car and a bicycle similar? You can't make watermelon juice out of either of them.

I have a head like a watermelon, the arms like two baguettes, and the body of toilet paper - what am I? Banned from the supermarket!

How do you make a watermelon more watery? You have to plant it in the spring (a spring is a small river).

If Jim has 15 watermelons and throws one at Mary, what does Mary have? A really bad headache!

What do you call a girl with no arms, no legs, sitting in a watermelon patch? Melanie! (melon-y)

What did the father cantaloupe say to his son? Watermelon! (Water-my-lawn)

What do you call a melon that commits a crime? A water-fellon!

Watermelon Quotes and 'Facts'

Girl biting into a wedge of watermelon, standing in the garden.

When it's hot outside and you want to make your children laugh, look no further than these quotes about watermelon! See if the kids believe these funny 'facts'. Beware, none of these are real facts about watermelons: they are puns made up for your entertainment!

If watermelons exist, so should firemelons, airmelons and earthmelons: these are the four elemelons.

Did you know there's 50% water in a watermelon? The other 50% is melon (because half of the word is 'water', and the other half is 'melon')

If you slice a watermelon into four pieces, you get a quartermelon.

People who say onions are the only plant that can make you cry have clearly never dropped a watermelon on their foot.

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Written by Mina Frost

Bachelor of Arts specializing in Linguistics, Master of Arts specializing in Investigative Reporting

Mina Frost picture

Mina FrostBachelor of Arts specializing in Linguistics, Master of Arts specializing in Investigative Reporting

Based in London, Mina enjoys discovering novel activities, places, and adventures to fill her days with. She has a Bachelor's degree in Linguistics from the University of Cambridge and a Masters's degree in Investigative Reporting from the Birbeck, University of London. Alongside this, she has a keen interest in children's literature and regularly shares her passion for culture with the children she babysits, making sure to keep up-to-date with the latest family movies, plays, and exhibitions. Having traveled extensively throughout Europe and beyond, Mina has a deep appreciation for exploring new locations and making new connections with people from all walks of life.

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