100 Funny Kitchen Jokes That Chefs Will Appreciate

Luca Demetriou
Dec 12, 2023 By Luca Demetriou
Originally Published on Mar 10, 2021
Edited by Luca Demetriou
Kids cooking with their father
Age: 0-99
Read time: 13.2 Min

Cooking is an art to be enjoyed with the elating cheerfulness of a child’s play and the delightful essence of an adult experience.

“My favorite room in the house is my kitchen...It’s the heart and soul of our home. It’s where we gather in the morning as a family to start the day, and it’s where we wind down at night over supper,” as quoted by Kimberly Schlapman, the kitchen is the soul and the artistic room of a home.

The kitchen is a place where memories are woven with love. It’s hard to hold back from being a zealous fan of food when there are so many heavenly delights to choose from. The kitchen is no less than a shrine for all foodies, the chef an artist, and food a masterpiece. This form of art is now finally getting deserved recognition and appreciation. Being a devoted gourmet, anything related to food seems fascinating, be it browsing food magazines, watching food videos, or reading funny kitchen quotes or food quotes. They never fail to provide an exhilarating means of spending time. The love for food is a blissful thing to experience. Many famous personalities like Sonia Rumzi, Paul Theroux, Susan Branch, Harriet Van Horne, Jarod Kintz and Harry S. Truman have said inspiring quotes on cooking and  kitchen appliances.

After reading these funny kitchen quotes, do check out our Gordon Ramsay quotes and baking quotes.

Funny Kitchen Quotes And Sayings

Life in the kitchen is a classic adventure. It is a fun place where delicious recipes are not the only being cooked but enjoyed, while you spend time with your family. Funny cooking quotes add a touch of humor to this great experience. Read on for some funny quotes from chefs along with Gordon Ramsay quotes.

A set of accessories for the kitchen

1. “If you can organize your kitchen, you can organize your life.”

- Louis Parrish.

2. “There is no sincerer love than the love of food.”

- George Bernard Shaw.

3. “Food should be fun.”

- Thomas Keller.

4. “I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.”

- W.C Fields.

5. “No one is born a great cook, one learns by doing.”

- Julia Child.

6. “Cooking well doesn’t mean cooking fancy.”

- Julia Child.

7. “Fat gives things flavor.”

- Julia Child.

8. “I was 32 when I started cooking; up until then, I just ate.”

- Julia Child.

9. “If you want to become a great chef, you have to work with great chefs. And that’s exactly what I did.”

- Gordon Ramsay.

10. “People who love to eat are always the best people.”

- Julia Child.

11. “It does not matter how expensive your kitchen is if you are a bad cook.”

- Loesje.

12. “Cooking is about passion, so it may look slightly temperamental in a way that it’s too assertive to the naked eye.”

- Gordon Ramsay.

13. “I wish my stove came with a Save As button like Word has. That way I could experiment with my cooking and not fear ruining my dinner.”

- Jarod Kintz.

14. “The worst mistake of a woman is to go to the kitchen, because then she never gets out of there.”

- Shakira.

15. “Cooking requires confident guesswork and improvisation experimentation and substitution, dealing with failure and uncertainty in a creative way.”

- Paul Theroux.

16. “Before Julia Child there was only onion dip.”

- Susan Branch.

17. “Cooking is like love. It should be entered into with abandon or not at all.”

- Harriet Van Horne.

18. “The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books-how not to eat what you’ve just learned how to cook.”

- Andy Rooney.

19. “My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people.”

- Orson Welles.

20. “The kitchen can be a very romantic place, Of course, if you’re with the right person.”

- Dominique Browning.

21. “A recipe has no soul, you as the cook must bring soul to the recipe.”

- Thomas Keller.

22. “The loveliest thing you can cook for someone who’s close to you is about as nice a valentine as you can give.”

- Julia Child.

23. “Love and sausage are alike. Can never have enough of either.”

- Trixie Koontz.

24. “All happiness depends on a leisurely breakfast.”

- John Gunther.

25. “Cooking is the art of adjustment.”

- Jacques Pepin.

Funny Kitchen Quotes For Walls

For some people, life will always be fun in the kitchen, for it is the place where great memories of childhood and delightful experiences of adulthood are present. Read on for truly funny kitchen quotes and sayings.  

26. “In the childhood memories of every good cook, there’s a large kitchen, a warm stove, a simmering pot and a mom.”

- Barbara Costikyan.

27. “Great cooking favors the prepared hands.”

- Jacques Pepin.

28. “Anything is good if it’s made of chocolate.”

- Jo Brand.

29. “The most indispensable ingredient of all good home cooking: love for those you are cooking for.”

- Sophia Loren.

30. “A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.”

- Barbara Johnson.

31. “I think careful cooking is love, don’t you?”

- Julia Child.

32. “The art of bread making can become a consuming hobby, and no matter how often and how many kinds of bread one has made, there always seems to be something new to learn.”

- Julia Child.

33. “You learn to cook so that you don’t have to be a slave to recipes. You get what’s in season and you know what to do with it.”

- Julia Child.

34. “Usually, one’s cooking is better than one thinks it is.”

- Julia Child.

35. “What a marvelous resource soup is for the thrifty cook - it solves the ham-bone and lamb-bone problems, the everlasting Thanksgiving turkey, the extra vegetables.”

- Julia Child.

36. “The perfect dressing is essential to the perfect salad, and I see no reason whatsoever for using a bottled dressing, which may have been sitting on the grocery shelf for weeks, even months - even years.”

- Julia Child.

37. “I think one of the terrible things today is that people have this deathly fear of food: fear of eggs, say, or fear of butter. Most doctors feel that you can have a little bit of everything.”

- Julia Child.

38. “It’s so beautifully arranged on the plate - you know someone’s fingers have been all over it.”

- Julia Child.

39. “In the 1960s, you could eat anything you wanted, and of course, people were smoking cigarettes and all kinds of things, and there was no talk about fat and anything like that, and butter and cream were rife. Those were lovely days for gastronomy, I must say.”

- Julia Child.

40. “In France, cooking is a serious art form and a national sport.”

- Julia Child.

41. “If we shake out all of the crumbs from all of the keyboards in the world, we can end world hunger.”

- Matthew Dolkart.

42. “I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.”

- A. Whitney Brown.

43. “Give me all the bacon and eggs you have.”

- Ron Swanson.

44. “The only thing I like better than talking about food is eating.”

- John Walters.

45. “Another day, another 13,000 calories.”

- Andy Lassner.

46. “Cooking and baking is both physical and mental therapy.”

- Mary Berry.

47. “I’m not a chef. But I’m passionate about food - the tradition of it, cooking it, and sharing it.”

- Zac Posen.

48. “I love spending time with my friends and family. The simplest things in life give me the most pleasure: cooking a good meal, enjoying my friends.”

- Cindy Morgan.

49. “Cooking is like painting or writing a song. Just as there are only so many notes or colors, there are only so many flavors - it’s how you combine them that sets you apart.”

- Wolfgang Puck.

50. “Cooking is at once child’s play and adult joy. And cooking done with care is an act of love.”

-  Craig Claiborne

Funny Chef Quotes

Funny Kitchen quotes are like a breath of fresh air to make the heart merry and glad, bringing back the souvenirs of these delightful moments. Here are some of the most funny baking quotes followed by more funny kitchen quotes for your childhood memories.

51. “Despite a few exceptions, I have found that Americans are now far more willing to learn new names, just as they’re far more willing to try new ethnic foods…It’s like adding a few new spices to the kitchen pantry.”

- Firoozeh Dumas.

52. “When you’re the conscious captain in your kitchen, you’ll feel better mentally and physically.”

- Kris Carr.

53. “Lucy settled into august’s kitchen as if they were a family.”

- Susan Richards Shreve.

54. “My recipe for dealing with anger and frustration: set the kitchen timer for twenty minutes, cry, rant, and rave, and at the sound of the bell, simmer down and go about business as usual.”

- Phyllis Diller.

55. “The more you know, the more you can create. There’s no end to imagination in the kitchen.”

- Julia Child.

56. “Happiness is a small house, with a big kitchen.”

- Alfred Hitchcock.

57. “It’s like a kitchen, acting. Put a chef in a kitchen and they will have different recipes. Whatever your recipe, what works for you won’t work for another.”

- Carole Bouquet.

58. “There has ling been a happy symbiotic relationship between kitchen and bar. Simply put, the kitchen wants booze, and the bartender wants food.”

- Anthony Bourdain.

59. “I have been in Sorrow’s kitchen and licked out all the pots. Then I have stood on the peaky mountain wrapped in rainbows, with a harp and sword in my hands.”

- Zora Neale Hurston.

60. “As an art form, cooktalk is, like haiku or kabuki, defined by established rules, with a rigid, traditional framework in which one may operate.”

- Anthony Bourdain.

61. “Best way to get rid of kitchen odors: Eat out.”

- Phyllis Diller.

62. “The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found.”

- Calvin Trillin.

63. “The only real stumbling block is fear of failure."

- Julia Child.

64. “Show me a man who lives alone and has a perpetually clean kitchen, and 8 times out of 9 I’ll show you a man with detestable spiritual qualities.”

- Charles Bukowski.

65. “My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor.”

- Phyllis Diller.

66. “In cooking you’ve got to have a what-the-hell attitude.”

- Julia Child.

67. “If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world.”

- J.R.R Tolkien.

68. “Cooking for people is an enormously significant expression of generosity and soulfulness.”

- Ted Allen.

69. “Cooking is an art and patience a virtue. Careful shopping, fresh ingredients and an unhurried approach are nearly all you need. There is one more thing - love. Love for food and love for those you invite to your table. With a combination of these things you can be an artist.”

- Keith Floyd.

70. “Tis an ill cook that cannot lick his own fingers.”

- William Shakespeare.

71. “There are times when wisdom cannot be found in the chambers of parliament or the halls of academia but at the unpretentious setting of the kitchen table.”

- E.A. Bucchianeri.

72. “If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.”

- Harry S. Truman.

73. “Afterwards, they always had tea in the kitchen, much the nicest room in the house.”

- Flora Thompson.

74. “The sight of iniquity, immorality, pure evil, perhaps the world’s end; a kitchen in disorder.”

- Kate Quinn.

75. “My happy place is you teaching me how to dance in the kitchen at two in the morning.”

- Lidia Longorio.

Funny Quotes For the Kitchen

The enticing food is garnished with memories of good times, experiences, love, and passion. Here is a list of our best collection of cooking and kitchen quotes for you in the hope of reinvigorating your enthusiasm for cooking. Which fo these funny kitchen quotes is your favorite?

76. “Its kitchens were enormous and capable of being put to any use except the convenient preparation of food.”

- Tom Holt.

77. “I cook to inspire my husband to pay attention to me.”

– Sonia Rumzi.

78. “No one became a great cook just by reading the recipes.”

- Amit Kalantri.

79. “The kitchen is a pharmacy; whereas, it is also a poison-room; it depends on you that, what you make of it?”

- Ehsan Sehgal.

80. “Never show people your menu, for your kitchen will be replaced by a dump site, your mind.”

- Goitsemang Mvula.

81. “A good fire makes a quick cook.”

- Dutch Proverb.

82. “If you heat an empty pot it bursts.”

- German Proverb.

83. “When the cook and the steward fall out, we hear who stole the butter.”

- Dutch Proverb.

84. “We all like lamb; each has a different way of cooking it.”

- Chinese Proverb.

85. “Even if a chef cooks just a fly, he would keep the breast for himself.”

- Polish Proverb.

86. “If you want dinner, don’t insult the cook.”

- Chinese Proverb.

87. “Talking doesn’t get your rice cooked.”

- Chinese Proverb.

88. “Even the best cooking pot will not produce food.”

- African Proverb.

89. “If the townspeople are happy, look for the cook.”

- Liberian Proverb.

90. “If cooks quarrel, the roast burns.”

- Chinese Proverb.

91. “What my mother believed about cooking is that if you worked hard and prospered, someone else would do it for you.

- Nora Ephron.

92. “The only time to eat diet food is while you’re waiting for the steak to cook.”

- Julia Child.

93. “I always say that I don’t believe I’m a chef. I try to be a storyteller.”

- Jose Andrés.

94. “I have made a lot of mistakes falling in love, and regretted most of them, but never the potatoes that went with them.”

- Nora Ephron.

95. “My philosophy from day one is that I can sleep better at night if I can improve an individual’s knowledge about food and wine, and do it on a daily basis.”

- Emeril Lagasse.

96. “To me, there’s no great chef without a great team.”

- Daniel Boulud.

97. “I tell a student that the most important class you can take is technique. A great chef is first a great technician. ‘If you are a jeweller, or a surgeon or a cook, you have to know the trade in your hand. You have to learn the process. You learn it through endless repetition until it belongs to you.”

- Jacques Pepín.

98. “I think every chef, not just in America, but across the world, has a double-edged sword - two jackets, one that’s driven, a self-confessed perfectionist, thoroughbred, hate incompetence and switch off the stove, take off the jacket and become a family man.”

- Gordon Ramsay.

99. “When I was 26, 27 years old I was running a kitchen in New York, and I was a raving lunatic. The older you get, you figure out you don’t need to do that. You realize at a certain point, there’s a certain gravity to what you say and what you do. If that’s not enough, all the yelling in the world is not going to matter.”

- Tom Colicchio.

100. “Techniques are not the most difficult to teach. The attitudes chefs take are much more important.”

- Alain Ducasse

Here at Kidadl, we have carefully created lots of interesting family-friendly quotes for everyone to enjoy! If you liked our suggestions for funny kitchen jokes that chefs will appreciate, why not look at cooking quotes and chef quotes.

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Written by Luca Demetriou

Bachelor of Arts specializing in English and Drama, Master of Arts specializing in Performance: Design and Practice

Luca Demetriou picture

Luca DemetriouBachelor of Arts specializing in English and Drama, Master of Arts specializing in Performance: Design and Practice

Experienced in writing and sub-editing, Luca holds a Bachelor's in English Literature and Drama from the University of Birmingham, where he served as the culture editor at Redbrick Paper. He is currently pursuing a Master's in Performance: Design and Practice at the University of the Arts in London, showcasing his passion for the arts, performance, and history. With a keen interest in traveling, Luca enjoys exploring new cultures and experiencing diverse perspectives.

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