The Best 150+ 'How I Met Your Mother' Quotes From The Hilariously Heart Warming Sitcom

Georgia Stone
Dec 12, 2023 By Georgia Stone
Originally Published on Feb 09, 2021
Edited by Monisha Kochhar
Restaurant pub in Berlin based on the series and the sitcom "How I Met Your Mother"
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Age: 0-99
Read time: 15.4 Min

How I Met Your Mother' is your go-to sitcom for a light break from your everyday life's problems.

It provides you with the perfect dose of funny, sassy, and sweet stories of friendship and love among the life of five friends. These are the best quotes from 'How I Met Your Mother' that will make you relive the show.

For more quotes, check out the Tina Belcher quotes and Tina Fey quotes.

Best Quotes From Barney In 'How I Met Your Mother'

Any Barney from 'How I met Your Mother' quotes, become legen — wait for it — dary. So make way for some of the awesomeness Barney brings to us with these HIMYM quotes.

1. 'Haaaaave you met Ted?'

2. 'Suit Up.'

3. 'Think of me as Yoda. Only instead of being little and green, I wear suits and I'm awesome. I'm your bro. I'm Broda.'

4. 'There’s three rules of cheating:

5. It’s not cheating if you’re not the one who’s married.

6. It’s not cheating if her name has two adjacent vowels.

7. And it’s not cheating if she’s from a different area code.'

8. 'Dude.. where’s your suit? Just once, when I say 'suit up' I wish you’d put on a suit.'

9. 'The Bro Code has been around for centuries. Nay… whatever’s more than centuries.'

10. 'I’m also pleased to announce The Bro Code is now available in select airlines across the country. And Lufthansa. ‘Der Bro Code’ is, like, huge in Germany.'

11. 'Ladies, Gentlemen, Ted.'

12. 'Whenever I’m sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead.'

13. 'It’s time to let go of the fantasies. It’s time to grow up.'

14. 'That was the night I was born. I rose like a phoenix from her mentholated bosom and strode into the world, Armani-clad and fully awesome.'

15. 'ARTICLE 41 A Bro never cries. EXCEPTIONS: Watching Field of Dreams, E.T., or a sports legend retire.'

16. 'Sometimes we search for one thing, but discover another.'

17. 'A lie is just a great story that someone ruined with the truth.'

18. 'When I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead.'

19. 'Step one, you start running. There is no step two.'

20. 'Here’s the mini-cherry on top of the regular cherry on top of the sundae of awesomeness that is my life.'

21. 'Sometimes we search for one thing but discover another.'

22. 'Settling down is for losers and kids who never go out anymore.'

23. 'There are only a few truly great people on this planet and he is one of them.'

24. 'Maybe it’s destiny?'

25. 'When I let a day go by without talking you….. That day is just no good.'

26. 'You are the love of my life. Everything I have and everything I am is yours. Forever.'

27. 'Sorry about your eye. I’m available.'

'How I Met Your Mother' Quotes From Ted Mosby

Ted from HIMYM has some two cents from his days of finding the 'one' and he imparts them with these famous quotes from 'How I Met Your Mother'.

28. 'You see, kids, right from the moment I met your mom I knew, I have to love this woman as much as I can, and as long as I can, and I can never stop loving her, not even for a second. '

29. 'If you’re not scared, you’re not taking a chance, and if you’re not taking a chance, then what the hell are you doing?'

30. 'And that, kids, is how I met your mother'

31. 'A word of advice: Play along. The more you fight it, the worse it’s gonna get.

32. 'I’m sorry, when I’m excited I abbreviate words I shouldn’t.'

33. 'Sometimes things have to fall apart to make way for better things.'

34. 'When you believe in people, people come through.'

35. 'Nothing good happens after 2AM.'

36. 'Shouldn’t we hold out for the person who doesn’t just tolerate our little quirks, but actually kind of likes them?'

37. 'It’s only once you’ve stopped that you realize how hard it is to start again.'

38. 'We’re going to get older, whether we like it or not, so the only question is whether we get on with our lives or desperately cling to the past.'

39. 'Never underestimate the power of destiny. Because when you least expect it, the littlest thing can cause a ripple effect that changes your life.'

40. 'Here’s the thing about mistakes: Sometimes, even when you know something’s a mistake, you gotta make it anyway.'

41. 'You can ask the universe for signs all you want but ultimately we’ll only see what we want to see…when we’re ready to see it.'

42. 'The great moments of your life won't necessarily be the things you do, they'll also be the things that happen to you.'

43. 'You see, the universe has a plan kids, and that plan is always in motion.'

44. 'It's a scary thought but it's also kind of wonderful.'

45. 'Sometimes our best decisions are the ones that don't make sense at all.'

46. 'It’s funny sometimes you walk into a place and you know you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be.'

47. 'All these little parts of the machine constantly working, making sure that you end up exactly where you're supposed to be, exactly when you're supposed to be there'

48. 'Here's the thing about mistakes. Sometimes, even when you know something's a mistake, you gotta make it anyway.'

49. 'But that's the funny thing about destiny: it happens whether you plan it or not.'

50. 'You can ask the universe for signs all you want but ultimately we'll only see what we want to see when we're ready to see it.'

51. 'It's like Descartes says, 'In order to determine whether we can know anything with certainty, we first have to doubt everything we know.'

52. 'If you're not scared then you're not taking a chance. And if you're not taking a chance, then what the hell are you doing anyway?'

53. 'Sometimes, things have to fall apart to make way for better things.'

54. 'Whether a gesture's charming or alarming, depends on how it's received.'

55. 'Sometimes even if you know how something's gonna end that doesn't mean you can't enjoy the ride.'

56. 'You can't force destiny. If it's gonna happen, it's gonna happen.'

57. 'Nothing good happens after 2:00 am… when 2:00 am rolls around, just go home and go to sleep.'

'How I Met Your Mother' Quotes From Robin Scherbatsky

Robin has the sassiest quotes that can always help you with a perfect comeback.

58. 'If you keep giving up on people so quickly, you’re gonna miss out on something great.'

59. 'I really don’t like feelings.'

60. 'I get recognized one time, and I start thinking I’m Julia Roberts. I’m no VIP; I’m not even an IP; I’m just a lonely little P sitting out here in the gutter.'

61. 'Oh my god, look at you cowards. So afraid of any kind of change. So terrified of anything new.'

62. 'I don’t wanna get married right now, maybe ever, and if we got together I’d feel like I’d either have to marry you or break your heart, and I just couldn’t do either of those things.'

63. 'The future is scary, but you can’t just run back to the past because it’s familiar.'

64. 'Destined? Aren’t you tired of waiting for destiny, Ted? Isn’t it time to make your own destiny?'

65. 'If you have chemistry, all you need is one other thing…Timing.'

66. 'Of course, it’s one thing not to want something; it’s another to be told you can’t have it.'

67. 'Why am I constantly looking for reasons not to be happy?'

68. 'I don’t know where I’m gonna be in five years. I don’t wanna know. I want my life to be an adventure.'

69. 'I May Not Love You The Way You Love Me, But I Do Love You.'

70. 'It's One Thing Not To Want Something. It's Another To Be Told You Can't Have It.'

71. 'The Future Is Scary, But You Can't Just Run Back To The Past Because It's Familiar.'

72. 'You Keep Giving Up On People So Quickly You're Gonna Miss Out On Something Great.'

73. 'You Can't Just Jump To The End. The Journey Is The Best Part.'

74. 'If I Ask You To Change Too Many Things About Yourself, You're Not Going To Be The Man I Fell In Love With.'

75. 'I Hate Most Babies, But Your Baby... I'm Going To Love That Kid So Much I'm Going To Pick It Up And Everything.'

76. 'But...Ummm.'

77. 'Oh, That's Right. I'm Alone.'

78. 'I'm Gonna Give You Summer Teeth...Some're Here, Some're There.'

'How I Met Your Mother' Quotes By Lily Aldrin

Lily was the mother of the group and Marshall's love of his life. She has some pretty advice with her wise quotes.

79. 'You can’t design your life like a building. It doesn’t work that way. You just have to live it, and it will design itself.'

80. 'Oprah wasn’t built in a day.'

81. 'We struggle so hard to hold on to these things that we know are gonna disappear eventually. And that’s really noble.'

82. 'It’s just, eventually we’re all gonna move on. It’s called growing up.'

83. 'Why say good bye to the good things?'

84. 'You can’t just skip ahead to where you think your life should be.'

85. 'The three-day rule is a childish, manipulative mind game. But yeah, you wait three days.'

86. 'Say goodbye to all the times you felt lost, to all the times it was a No instead of a Yes, to all the scrapes and bruises, to all the heartache.'

87. 'I do not need objectivity. You are my best friend, I just need your support.'

88. 'You cannot design your life like a building. It does not work that way. You just have to live it instead and it will design itself.'

89. 'It is just....eventually we all are going to move on. It is called growing up.'

90. 'Why not just say goodbye to the bad things?'

91. 'The bigger mistake would be not to make a mistake, because then you will live your whole life not really knowing if something is a mistake or not.'

92. 'You cannot just skip ahead to where you think your life should be. It does not work that way.'

93. 'If you keep lying to me, if you keep cutting me out of decisions, if you keep using words like winning and losing when you talk about our marriage, you are going to lose me.

94. 'Say goodbye to all the times you felt lost, to all the times it was a no instead of a yes, to all the scrapes and bruises, to all the heartache.'

95. 'We struggle so hard on to these things that we know are going to disappear eventually. And that is really noble.'

96. 'Your heart is talking to you. Do you have the guts to listen to it?'

Refreshing And Funny Marshall Quotes

Marshall was probably the cutest character in 'How I met Your Mother' and gave Barney a run for his peace with his slap-athon.

97. 'You have to let me dance my own battles.'

98. 'All hail Beercules!'

99. 'It’s not about proof; it’s about faith. Faith is what gives life shape and meaning.'

100. 'Look at us, riding around in a limo, eating hot dogs…it’s like we’re the president.'

101. 'It looks like someone suffered from premature slapulation.'

102. 'That’s life, you know. We never end up where you thought you wanted to be.'

103. 'Happy Slapsgiving!'

104. 'One good deed leads to another and another.'

105. 'A drumroll? So what? That's it? You just said good night, went home and... performed the drum solo?'

106. 'Revenge fantasies never work out the way you want.'

107. 'I’m cuddly. Deal with it.'

108. 'I’m Cuddly...Deal With It.'

109. 'This Is Rex. He Lives With Us Now.'

110. 'I'm A Good Boyfriend In My Sleep.'

111. 'Lawyered,'

112. 'You Have To Let Me Dance My Own Battles!'

113. 'I thought I Saw Big Foot In Central Park So I Tackled Him.'

114. 'The Only Person Who Loves Ted Mosby More Than Marshall Eriksen, Is Drunk Marshall Eriksen!'

115. 'Love Does Not Boast.'

116. 'Our Relationship Is Based On Mutual Trust.'

Love Quotes From 'How I Met Your Mother'

Popcorn spilling over the phone displaying Netflix icon

Check out these 'How I Met Your Mother' quotes to describe love.

117. 'Robin: I’m such a mess. Why do you even like me?

Barney: I guess, because you’re almost as messed up as I am.'

- 'How I Met Your Mother'.

118. 'And when you love someone, you just don’t stop. Ever.'

- Ted Mosby.

119. 'Some couples always support each other, and some couples always challenge each other. But is one really better than the other? Yes. Support is better. Way better.'

- Future Ted Mosby.

120. “If you’re looking for a word that means caring about someone beyond all rationality and wanting them to have everything they want, no matter how much it destroys you, it’s ‘love.’”

-Ted Mosby.

121. 'If I ask you to change too many things about yourself, you’re not gonna be the man I fell in love with.'

— Robin Scherbatsky.

122. 'Love doesn’t make sense. I mean, you can’t logic your way into or out of it.'

- Ted Mosby.

123. 'Here’s the secret kids. None of us can vow to be perfect. In the end all we can do is promise to love each other with everything we’ve got. Because love’s the best thing we do.'

- Ted Mosby.

124. 'There are two big days in any love story: the day you meet the girl of your dreams and the day you marry her.'

- Ted Mosby.

125. 'Because sometimes even if you know how something’s gonna end, that doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy the ride.'

-Ted Mosby.

126. 'I’ve never asked Lily to do anything ‘no questions asked’ because I never wanted to. She’s the love of my life. I never keep anything from her.'

- Marshall Eriksen.

Legendary 'How I Met Your Mother' Quotes

Some 'How I Met Your Mother' quotes that passed the legendary bar of Barney Stinson.

127. 'It’s going to be legen — wait for it — dary.'

- Barney Stinson.

128. 'It's going to be legen - wait for it - and I hope you're not lactose intolerant, because the second half of the word is - dary! Legendary!'

-Barney Stinson.

129. 'Whatever you do in this life, it's not legendary unless your friends are there to see it.'

-Barney Stinson.

130. 'Every night can’t be legendary. If all nights are legendary, no nights are legendary.'

-Ted Mosby.

'How I Met Your Mother' Friendship Quotes

A story of five friends and their ups and downs that they handle together, 'How I Met Your Mother' brings the best friendship quotes for you to send your friends.

131. 'We'll always be friends. It's just never gonna be how it was. It can't be. And that doesn't have to be a sad thing.'

-Lily Aldrin.

132. 'You’re my best friend. I don’t need objectivity. I just need your support.'

- Lily Aldrin.

133. 'We spend so much effort trying to keep parts of our lives hidden, even from our closest friends, that in those rare times when we do open up, it's amazing how minor those secrets all end up being.'

-Ted Mosby.

134. 'Maybe this isn’t a breakup. Maybe this is just two friends getting back together.'

- Barney Stinson.

135. 'Lily, there are a million reasons why I love you. [...] But the main reason is you’re my best friend, Lily. You’re the best friend I’ve ever had.'

- Marshall Eriksen.

Funny Quotes From 'How I Met Your Mother'

These funny 'How I Met Your Mother' quotes will get you all laughing.

136. Coming up next, is your baby trying to kill you?' - Robin Scherbatsky.

137. 'Robin: Guys are like the subway. You miss one, another comes along in five minutes.

Lily: Unless it’s the end of the night, and then you get on anything.'

- 'How I Met Your Mother'.

138. 'You made it to 200. You should be proud. You should be tested, but you should be proud.'- Ted Mosby.

139. 'I just want to say from the bottom of my heart… I’m going to kill you.' -Robin Scherbatsky.

140. 'Italy doesn’t need something that is wrinkled, red and leaky, and smells like booze and narcotics. They’ve already got former Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi.' - Marshall Eriksen.

141. First of all, my parents live in Ohio. I live in the moment.'- Ted Mosby.

142. 'Just like Ryan Gosling in ‘The Notebook’. It was pretty manly till I mentioned Ryan Gosling in ‘The Notebook’, huh?' -Ted Mosby.

143. 'Canada also helped in two world wars and gave the world Neil Young, William Shatner, Leonard Cohen, Pamela Anderson, one-quarter of Barney Stinson, instant mashed potatoes and best of all – you.' - Barney Stinson.

144. 'Well, that answers all the questions I didn’t ask.' - Robin Scherbatsky.

145. 'Yes, I’m in a rotten mood. No, I don’t want to talk about it. Yes, this has booze in it. No, it’s not my first.' -Lily Aldrin.

146. 'Sorry, Peter. We’re grown-ups now, we can’t fly to Neverland with you anymore.'-Ted Mosby.

147. 'I’m from Minnesota, where there’s plenty of hot-dogs for everyone. Perhaps even too many…' - Marshall Eriksen.

148. 'In marriage, being right is less important than being supportive. Remember: Happy wife equals happy life.' -Lily Aldrin.

149. 'The best I can give you is a fake smile and dead eyes.'- Robin Scherbatsky.

150. 'I finally found the one, Marshall. Her name is Bacon.'- Ted Mosby.

151. 'Kids, when you’re in a new relationship and you’re competing with your ex for who’s happier, it can get ugly.'- Ted Mosby.

152. 'Trish made me do 70 push-ups, but she only give me credit for 10. Then she had me do 100 sit-ups and *then* she made me cry using only her words.'- Marshall Eriksen.

153. 'Barney Stinson : ...you're the most awesome person I have ever known, well, the second most awesome.

Robin Scherbatsky : Right, of course, the first being you.

154. 'No, no, the first is this guy who lives in a place called the mirror'- Barney Stinson

Here at Kidadl, we have carefully created lots of interesting family-friendly quotesfor everyone to enjoy! If you liked our suggestions for 'How I Met Your Mother' quotes then why not take a look at Tobias Funke quotes, or Kevin Malone quotes.

Main image credit: frantic00 / Shutterstock.com

Second image credit: Burdun Iliya / Shutterstock.com

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Written by Georgia Stone

Bachelor of Arts specializing in French with Film Studies, Bachelor of Arts (Year Abroad) specializing in Literature, History, Language, Media, and Art

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Georgia StoneBachelor of Arts specializing in French with Film Studies, Bachelor of Arts (Year Abroad) specializing in Literature, History, Language, Media, and Art

Georgia is an experienced Content Manager with a degree in French and Film Studies from King's College London and Bachelors degree from Université Paris-Sorbonne. Her passion for exploring the world and experiencing different cultures was sparked during her childhood in Switzerland and her year abroad in Paris. In her spare time, Georgia enjoys using London's excellent travel connections to explore further afield.

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