The Best What Do You Call A Man Jokes For Kids

Joan Agie
Apr 01, 2024 By Joan Agie
Originally Published on Mar 12, 2024
Edited by Anusuya Mukherjee
Fact-checked by Martha Martins
A family sat on the sofa laughing, an ideal inspiration for 'what do you call a man' jokes.
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Age: 0-99
Read time: 8.9 Min



Embark on a comical adventure with the best 'what do you call a man' jokes crafted for kids' entertainment! Ideal for family giggles, this roundup of jokes is brimming with clever puns and light-hearted fun. Whether it's a man wearing something unusual or someone in a bizarre situation, these jests will have kids (and adults!) laughing out loud.

The humor is simple yet smart, playing with names, occupations, and scenarios to delight your funny bone. Dive into this joyful collection of jokes that perfectly blend silliness with wit, ensuring a delightful time for all.

Classic What Do You Call A Man Jokes

An image of a young man having a belly laugh.Shutterstock

Prepare for timeless chuckles with a selection of classic 'what do you call a man' jokes'. This medley of jests takes simple scenarios and gives them a witty twist, creating an atmosphere of joy and laughter that transcends generations.

The humor lies in the unexpected punchlines paired with everyday situations, making each joke a memorable moment of lighthearted amusement for families to enjoy together.

1. What do you call a man who’s always there when you need him? Andy.

2. What do you call a man who eats everything he sees? Buffet.

3. What do you call a man delivered in a letterbox? Bill.

4. What do you call a man with an angry blue, black, and yellow mark on his face? Bruce.

5. What do you call a man holding a spade? Doug.

6. What do you call a man lifting a car on his head? Jack.

7. What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals? Phillipe Philoppe.

8. What do you call a man who sleeps outside on the lawn? Dewey.

9. What do you call two men standing by the window? Curt and Rod.

10. What do you call a Spanish guy who just got discharged from the hospital? Manuel.

11. What do you call a man with a toilet seat on his head? Lou.

12. What do you call a man wearing a coat on his head? Mac.

13. What do you call a man with two coats on his head? Max.

14. What do you call a man who sits at the door? Matt.

15. What do you call a man reading a map? Miles.

16. What do you call a man who hates gaps? Phil.

17. What do you call a man wearing a kilt? Scott.

18. What do you call a man stuffed in a pot? Stu.

19. What do you call a man who's good at catching fish? Net.

20. What do you call a man who's always in the shade? Sunny.

21. What do you call a man who's good with a bow and arrow? Archer.

22. What do you call a man who's always on time? Justin.

23. What do you call a man holding a legal document? Will.

24. What do you call a man who is weak in his knees? Neil.

25. What do you call a man who likes gardening? Herb.

26. What do you call a man who stays too long in the toilet? John.

27. What do you call an Italian man with a rubber toe? Roberto.

28. What do you call a guy with a strong knee? Rodney.

29. What do you call a handcuffed man? Trustworthy.

30. What do you call a man who is holding a car number plate? Reg.

31. What do you call a man's idea of women? Wrong.

32. What do you call a man wearing a crown? Roy.

33. What do you call a man who stole a bowl of nacho cheese? A con queso.

34. What do you call a man who invests in government bonds? James Bond.

35. What do you call a man with three legs? Tripp

36. What do you call a man who loves to jump in leaf piles? Russell.

37. What do you call a man who's always in a hurry? Rush.

38. What do you call a man with two left feet? Awkward.

39. What do you call a man who makes pottery? Clay.

40. What do you call a man who cuts down trees? Woody.

41. What do you call a man who tells too many jokes about the sea? A real kraken-up.

42. What do you call a man who can do a lot of push-ups? Strong.

43. What do you call a man with a large flatfish on his head? Ray.

44. What do you call a man who always seems lost? Wanda.

45. What do you call a man who loves to work out? Jim.

46. What do you call a man with no arms and legs in a swimming pool? Bob.

47. What do you call a man with cat scratches on his body? Claude.

48. What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Cliff.

49. What do you call a man with no ears? Anything you want.

50. What do you call a man with a plank of wood on his head? Edward Woodward.

What Do You Call A Woman Jokes

A young woman sitting on a chair in a plain yellow background and laughing.Shutterstock

Step into the realm of clever wordplay with a charming collection of 'what do you call a woman' jokes. This assortment of quips puts a humorous spin on female names and scenarios, offering a playful way to engage in light-hearted humor.

Ideal for sharing a laugh, these jokes provide a fun opportunity to celebrate the whimsy of language with friends and family.

51. What do you call a woman who is tired of men? Jade.

52. What do you call a woman who can't stop telling funny mountain jokes? Hillary.

53. What do you call a woman with slates on her head? Ruth.

54. What do you call a woman with two toilets on her head? Lulu.

55. What do you call a woman with a laptop on her head? Adell.

56. What do you call a woman who sings during Christmas? Carol.

57. What do you call a woman who has legs hanging on either side of a river? Bridgette.

58. What do you call a woman standing in the breeze? Gail.

59. What do you call a woman who drives a truck? Laurie.

60. What do you call a woman who always wins arguments? Victoria.

61. What do you call a woman who throws her bills in the fire? Bernadette.

62. What do you call a woman who catches butterflies? Annette.

63. What do you call a warrior woman wearing a brown paper suit? Brown-hilda.

64. What do you call a woman who can open wine bottles, fix the sink, handle the kids, bake the perfect cake, and still find time to watch her favorite show? A Swiss army wife.

65. What do you call a woman who always knows where her husband is? Jessica.

66. What do you call a woman who can juggle three books on her head? Paige.

67. What do you call a woman floating in the ocean? Marina.

68. What do you call a woman who loves to garden? Flora.

69. What do you call a woman who's an excellent shot with a bow? Diana.

70. What do you call a woman who's always in a hurry? Rushelle.

71. What do you call a woman who loves the stars? Stella.

72. What do you call a woman who can light up a room with her smile? Dawn.

73. What do you call a woman who's always at the beach? Sandy.

74. What do you call a woman who's great at telling stories? Fable.

75. What do you call a woman who owns a tortoise? Shelley.

76. What do you call a woman with a cat on her lap? Kathy.

77. What do you call a woman with a frog resting on her body? Lily.

What Do You Call An Animal Jokes

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Embark on a giggly safari with this collection of animal-themed 'what do you call' jokes. These lighthearted jests combine familiar creatures with a twist of humor, delighting anyone eager to indulge in a playful escape into the animal world.

Guaranteed to spark joy, each joke serves as an invitation to share laughter and connect over the universal language of fun.

78. What do you call a cow that plays an instrument? A moo-sician!

79. What do you call a cat that can play the guitar? A rock star!

80. What do you call a bee that can't make up its mind? A maybee!

81. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef!

82. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!

83. What do you call a deer that only costs a dollar? A buck.

84. What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter? An irrelephant!

85. What do you call a snowman on a hot day? A puddle!

86. What do you call a group of musical whales? An orca-stra!

87. What do you call a spider that can dance? A jitterbug!

88. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh.

89. What do you call a dog magician? A labracadabrador.

90. What do you call a dinosaur fart? A blast from the past

91. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!

92. What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

93. What do you call a pig that does karate? Pork chop.

FAQs

What Makes a 'What Do You Call a Man' Joke Appropriate for Kids?

These jokes are tailored to be appropriate for children by avoiding sensitive subjects and focusing on simple, clean humor involving wordplay and puns that kids can easily grasp and find amusing.

Can These Jokes Be Used in Educational Settings?

Absolutely! Utilizing these jokes can be a fun way to engage students in language lessons, highlighting the nuances of word meanings and homophones in a way that is both entertaining and educational.

What Can Parents Do if Their Child Doesn't Understand a Joke?

An image of a baby laughing.Shutterstock

If a child doesn't understand a joke, parents can explain the pun or wordplay involved. This is a great opportunity for a mini-lesson on language and can enhance a child's understanding and appreciation of humor.

How Can Telling These Jokes Benefit a Child's Development?

Telling jokes can help children improve their language skills and social interaction. It encourages creative thinking, sharpens their understanding of language subtleties, and can boost confidence in social settings.

Are These Jokes Suitable for All Ages?

While these jokes are aimed at children, their clean and simple humor makes them suitable for family members of all ages to enjoy together, creating a shared laughter experience.


The 'what do you call a man' jokes offer an endless stream of fun and creativity for kids and families alike. You have journeyed through puns about people, food, fashion, quirky scenarios, animals, and even celebrity-inspired jests.

These one-liners and quick quips can not only bring about a good chuckle but also aid kids in understanding wordplay and the nuances of language humor. So go ahead and unleash these silly, pun-filled jokes on your next family time to share some laugh-out-loud moments together!

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Sources

https://www.comedy.co.uk/forums/thread/21021/

https://ponly.com/what-do-you-call-jokes/

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mackintosh

https://www.indy100.com/viral/what-do-you-call-jokes

https://www.beano.com/posts/what-do-you-call-jokes

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Written by Joan Agie

Bachelor of Science specializing in Human Anatomy

Joan Agie picture

Joan AgieBachelor of Science specializing in Human Anatomy

With 3+ years of research and content writing experience across several niches, especially on education, technology, and business topics. Joan holds a Bachelor’s degree in Human Anatomy from the Federal University of Technology, Akure, Nigeria, and has worked as a researcher and writer for organizations across Nigeria, the US, the UK, and Germany. Joan enjoys meditation, watching movies, and learning new languages in her free time.

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Fact-checked by Martha Martins

Bachelor of Arts specializing in Linguistics

Martha Martins picture

Martha MartinsBachelor of Arts specializing in Linguistics

Martha is a full-time creative writer, content strategist, and aspiring screenwriter who communicates complex thoughts and ideas effectively. She has completed her Bachelor's in Linguistics from Nasarawa State University. As an enthusiast of public relations and communication, Martha is well-prepared to substantially impact your organization as your next content writer and strategist. Her dedication to her craft and commitment to delivering high-quality work enables her to create compelling content that resonates with audiences.

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