50 Best Beard Puns That Will Really Grow On You

Rajnandini Roychoudhury
Dec 12, 2023 By Rajnandini Roychoudhury
Originally Published on Jan 06, 2021
Edited by Monisha Kochhar
Environmental portrait of a senior man with long beard
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Age: 0-99
Read time: 6.8 Min

Beards and hairs amplify all the facial features, and nowadays, there are various styles like goatee, Heisenberg, etc., to make your beards look in shape and highlight certain features. The circle beard is a very profound style with so many famous appearances in movies like we see on Walter White.

But our ultimate goal is to read some beard humor and crack bearded puns in a hairy situation to make the moment light and interesting. A bearded man with some funny beards puns makes him a majestic man with a witty mind!

Here is a collection of goatee puns and silly beard puns about beard to make you laugh whether you are bearded or not.

You are at the perfect junction of some freshly curated list of puns about beards, and all you need to have is beard humor. Be ready to start a conversation with the best men in your life as all these puns are family-friendly and clean-shaven. These are some un-beard-ably funny puns about beard.

If you like this article, you will also like Beard Jokes and Mustache Jokes.

Funny Beard Puns

Portrait of bearded hipster with tattooe on his arms

Beards are good to see, and most of the men want to be bearded and flaunt some facial features. But here we focus on an amazing collection of some funny beard one-liners added with some beard humor to get some hilarious starts to a conversation with some bearded men.

1. Pavlov's beard was so soft due to all the chemical conditioning.

2. A bearded man was thinking of getting his beard shaved off, but then he found out it was quite attached to him.

3. At first, I did not like having a beard. But eventually, it grew on me.

4. A bearded man went to a bank to deposit some cash, but the banker told him that his shavings were too small.

5. The barber won the race once again, people say he took the short cut.

6. A man growing a beard is quite similar to a doctor as both of them need patience.

7. Every poet's dream is to have a beard style like Shakes-beard.

8. Shouldn't a heavily bearded man who loves to sing fables be called the 'beard' of the land?

9. A bearded man was securing his future by investing heavily in the shavings account.

10. The heavily bearded man looked so courageous that people could see that if he wanted, he could even beard the lion.

11. A barber used to shave the lion's fur, it was dangerous, but it was his mane source of income.

12. A bearded man went shopping for aftershave but was soon disappointed when he got to know that it was "out of odor."

Interesting Shaving Puns

Shaving and grooming are the best way to take care of your beard so take your impression to the next level with some precisely created puns to grab all the attention. Following are some puns on shaving and shaving tools to see the wonders puns can do.

13. Shaving your beard correctly can get you a head start in life.

14. When the customer tried to ask a question about his beard style, the barber told him, "Can you shave it for later?"

15. A clean-shaven stand-up comedian cuts above the rest as their wit is razor-sharp.

16. A student was inquisitive about finance and shavings, so he asked his teacher about them; the teacher replied: "Please razor your hands first and then ask the questions."

17. A customer was impressed by his barber's financial stability, so he said to him, "I must-ache you how did you manage your finances?" The barber replied, " I firmly believe in shaving regularly."

18. The man with the legendary beard loved it so much that it took shear force to shave it off.

19. A poultry farmer was searching for a device to shave the cheese easily as it would be quite grate and useful.

20. A large number of customers were standing outside a salon to get a haircut, so they formed a barber-queue.

21. A barber participated in the no-shave November challenge and lost all his shavings.

Witty Puns About Facial Hair

Facial hair makes you look mature, magnificent, dignified, and some other respectful adjectives you can think of. Scroll through these beard puns for some facial hair puns and mustache puns, to be specific, and have a good time with these kid-friendly clean puns.

22. A barber shaved off a customer's eyebrows, so the customer said, "It was none of your bush-i-ness."

23. A barber invited a shepherd over for brunch, and asked, "Do you want some goatee?"

24. Any item that a barber keeps for their children must be their hairloom.

25. The barber suggested, "Do not shave your mustache; it looks fan-stache-tic this time."

26. I told my barber that I have a job interview so I told the man that I want the best haircut, and he said, "Yes, that will be a good head start for the interview."

Humorous Puns Related To Hair

Hair adds definition to a face, and these thin strands have various styling methods that take hours in the salon. So, here are some puns to add some seasoning to all those boring hours or some conversation starters with your friends which will never go gray.

Enjoy your times with the best puns about hairs and hairdressers. To level up your wittiness, hair are some of the best hilarious puns.

27. My barber is always an optimist regardless of how huge the problem is; he uncurls it out and rests a-sheared.

28. The moon wanted to get a haircut, so he went to the lunar eclipse.

29. The boss had a bad hair day, so every employee's day was cut short.

30. The barber wanted to lose some weight and so, he ended up doing some hairobics.

31. A barber couple's relationship could no longer be rescued as it reached split-end.

32. Barbers are known for their driving skills as they know every short-cut in the town.

33. The hairdressers who went for an interview refused to take the job as the company had lots of condition-ers.

34. When the customer learned that the barbershop he went to was haunted, it made his hair stand on end.

35. Seeing how tensed the mother of the little boy was getting, the barber told her to let her hair down.

36. The customer was finding his barber to be too slow with the scissors. He just wanted him to get out of his hair!

37. A bald customer left the wig shop without purchasing the wig because he thought it was too much tou-pee for.

38. The gym trainer suggested me to do dye-ting as it seems to be the best choice for my body type.

39. I got into a crazy argument with my hairdresser, and I guess it has now turned into a hairy one.

40. The meticulous barber was known to check hair by the hair's breadth before cutting it.

41. Johnny talked about a dream where he could see a monster was full of hair. According to him, it was a hairable experience for him.

42. The hairdresser turns out to have great storytelling skills as he can add twists to a hairy situation.

43. Every hairdresser turns out to be the best curling player.

44. The saints were looking for a name for the church, and suddenly the barber said, "h-airway to heaven" would be appropriate.

45. Supermodels want their hair done in such a way that not even a single hair is out of place.

46. Wavy hair may get offended if you don't wave back at it.

47. The Easter Bunny was late this year because it was his bad hare day.

48. Visiting a salon after a bad day is always the best option; it is always filled with hair-larious people.

49. In Egypt, barbers used to write Hairoglyphs.

50. A locksmith wants his hair to be done by the best in the town, Shear-lock Holmes.

Here at Kidadl, we have carefully created lots of great family-friendly Puns for everyone to enjoy! If you liked our suggestions for Best Beard Puns, then why not take a look at Mustache Jokes or Hair Jokes.

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Written by Rajnandini Roychoudhury

Bachelor of Arts specializing in English, Master of Arts specializing in English

Rajnandini Roychoudhury picture

Rajnandini RoychoudhuryBachelor of Arts specializing in English, Master of Arts specializing in English

With a Master of Arts in English, Rajnandini has pursued her passion for the arts and has become an experienced content writer. She has worked with companies such as Writer's Zone and has had her writing skills recognized by publications such as The Telegraph. Rajnandini is also trilingual and enjoys various hobbies such as music, movies, travel, philanthropy, writing her blog, and reading classic British literature. 

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