85+ Best Baseball Jokes That Will Leave You In Stitches
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Baseball is a very popular sport in many countries.
This professional sport has always been played between two teams. Each team consists of 9 members.
During the game, each team gets a chance to bat while the other fields. The team who scores maximum runs ends up being the winner of the game.
The baseball professional league in the USA and Canada is hugely famous and garners views from other countries as well. Here we have composed the best jokes on baseball, so keep all your troubles aside and enjoy the jokes. No matter the number of curveballs life throws at you, read these jokes, and keep a smile on your face!
If you are interested in reading more sports puns and jokes, take a look at these other articles: baseball puns and football jokes.
Best Baseball Jokes For Hitting Home runs!
Listed below are some of the best baseball one-liners, baseball player jokes.
1. When pitching the ball, why does the pitcher raise only one of his legs and not two legs? If he would have raised both of his legs, he would have fallen down!
2. Why can you not find the biggest diamond in New York in jewelry shops? Because the largest diamond in New York is at Yankee Stadium!
3. Why did the baseball team that was at the bottom of the points table chart take a ghost in their team? Because they wanted to add more team spirit!
4. Why did the coach hire a baker for their team? Because the team was in bad shape and dire need of a good batter!
5. What is the only thing in a game of baseball that goes all around the field but never moves on its own? The fence surrounding the field!
6. How can you differentiate between an umpire and a pickpocket? The former watches the steals while the latter steals watches!
7. Only when should a baseball player put heavy armor on their body? Only when they play the knight games!
8. While leaving the hand, what did the glove say to the ball? You are leaving soon, so catch ya later!
9. Which is the only place where the catchers sit during lunch? They all sit behind the plate!
10. Which is the main reason why Yankee Stadium is one of the coolest places on earth? Because it is always filled with fans!
11. Why was the Phillies game so hot? Because it didn't have any fans at the stadium!
12. Which baseball player absolutely loved the ovens and the fireplaces? Mr. Mickey Mantle!
13. Did I tell you the funny joke about a pop fly? On second thoughts, don't bother. It will go above your head!
14. What are the special baseball rules that are only exclusive to zebras in the world series? Three stripes, and you are out!
15. Which baseball player is known for making the best flapjacks? Obviously, the batter!
16. Which insect hits the maximum of home runs in the jungle baseball world series league? A fly swatter!
17. Why are all the baseball umpires known for having stout figures? Because their main job is to clean all the plates!
18. Which job does a baseball player take when his eyesight starts to get bad? He becomes an umpire!
19. Where do the players keep their mitt while they drive their cars? They usually keep them in the glove compartment!
20. Which baseball player in the team has the role of carrying water for the other teammate? The pitcher!
Funny Baseball Jokes For Kids
Here you will find hilariously funny pitcher jokes, world series jokes, and kids baseball jokes.
21. Why do baseball games usually take place during the night time? Because bats are known for sleeping during the day!
22. How can you differentiate between Yankee fans and dentists? The former roots for the yanks, while the latter is known for yanking for the roots.
23. With what kind of bats does a male cow play baseball? They play with bullpens!
24. Which movie of the Star Wars series is an absolute favorite of all baseball players? 'Star Wars: The Umpire Strikes Back!'
25. How are baseball players known to keep in touch with one another? They simply touch bases once in a while!
26. How will you differentiate between the father of larvae and a baseball that has been hit high? The former is a fly pop while the latter is a pop fly!
27. Why did the baseball batter visit the library for just five minutes in the middle of the game? Because it was a shortstop!
28. For what reason was Cinderella thrown out from the famous baseball team? She had to be kicked off the team as she always ran away from the ball.
29. Why did a squadron of police storm inside the baseball stadium in the middle of a game? Because they received complaints of someone constantly stealing bases!
30. Which utensils does a baseball player use when he bakes cakes for his family? He uses a batter, oven mitts, and most definitely a bunt pan!
31. Why did the champion baseball team hire a bunch of lumberjacks for their team? Because they are experts in being the put-off man!
32. What do pitchers usually eat before a baseball game? They usually have a couple of sliders!
33. Why did the baseball coach hire a traffic officer for his team? So that he could send signals during the game!
34. Why did the captain of the pirate's baseball team hire a baseball player? So that he could have a chest protector!
35. Why was the retired baseball player hired by the multinational sales and marketing company? Because they knew that he could always pitch good sales!
36. Why are all baseball players vastly wealthy? Because every baseball player plays on the diamond!
37. Why did the baseball team banish the skeleton from their team? Because everyone knew that he didn't have his heart in the team!
38. Why do baseball players often have a side job as a playback singer? Because they are known to hit very high pitches!
39. Why was the chicken banished from being the umpire at the baseball game? Because it kept on calling fowl balls every time!
40. Why wasn't the dog allowed to take part in the jungle's baseball team? Because the dog was a boxer!
Good Baseball Jokes For Everyone
Looking to laugh your heart out? These baseball jokes, cheesy baseball jokes, and baseball dad jokes will make anyone laugh. A baseball joke might be just what you need!
41. If a pirate decided to play professional baseball, which would be ideal baseball teams for him? Arrrrrrrrrrrrrr-Kansas City!
42. Why did the coach of the baseball team bring strings in the game? He got it so that he could tie the score!
43. Why was the chicken asked to leave the ground during the finals of the league? He was ejected on charges of excessive fowl language!
44. How many baseball coaches are required if you want to change a lightbulb? Zero. Because everyone will be busy quarreling about the last call of the game!
45. What would happen if the champion team hires the invisible man to be their pitcher of the team? We would see pitching that has never been seen before!
46. Who would be hitting the plate if there is a strawberry cookie dough at the first base, a brownie mix at the second, and a plum pudding in the third? Obviously, the cake batter!
47. Which animal is exceptional in playing baseball? Frogs. They can catch flies very easily!
48. Did you check out the fast pitch in today's game? Well, don't bother. You have probably missed it!
49. To which state does a baseball player visit when he wants to get a couple of new uniforms? He goes to New Jersey!
50. In the bug baseball tournament, which animal was not allowed to play the competition? Centipedes. As they take a lot of time in wearing their boots!
51. Why was the Queen so interested in watching the baseball game? Because it is a knight game!
52. Which animal is an expert in playing baseball and hitting home runs? Bats!
53. Where do baseball players eat their lunch and dinner? They usually eat at the home plates!
54. Why is Cinderella a very bad baseball player? Because her baseball coach was a pumpkin!
55. What do you end up with if you cross a baseball player with a tree? You usually get a Babe Root!
56. Why can you not play the game of baseball in the jungle? Because jungles are the home of many cheetahs!
57. What causes a baseball stadium to turn extremely hot? When the game finishes, the stadium becomes hot as all the fans leave it.
58. What caused the sausage to retire from baseball? He became fed up with being the wurst member of the team.
59. What is the similarity of an angry chicken with that of a baseball umpire? They have very foul mouths!
60. Why is it easier to run from the first base to the second and not from the second to the third? Because the shortstop in the middle makes it longer!
61. Which is the place where the baseball players usually wash their kits? The bleachers!
62. Which comic Superhero is a pro at playing baseball? Batman!
63. Why does the baseball player love taking his child to the park every afternoon? Because he likes to visit the swings!
64. Why are baseball players equally good singers? Because they can pitch the tubes perfectly!
65. What do you end up with if you cross a baseball player with a monster? You usually get a double header!
66. Why do baseball players abstain from joining unions? Because they don't like being called on for strikes!
67. Why did the baseball player and part-time blogger close his website? He got frustrated and sad when he didn't get many hits!
68. Why do matchsticks absolutely hate baseball? They get really upset because they are always out after just a single strike!
69. In which league do coal and ironworkers play baseball? They usually play in the miner leagues!
70. What did the coach tell the rookie player about his pitching style? It's simply foul!
71. At the doubleheader, why couldn't the fans get their hands in the soda pop? They couldn't, as the home team lost the opener!
72. Why do coaches send mummies into the game, especially at the dying minutes of the match? Because they can assure that they would wrap up everything in style!
73. What do you usually end up with whenever you mix a carpet with any baseball player? You get a throw rug!
74. How do you know if a pitcher has a good game? Whenever he misses the bat for three consecutive innings!
75. In a baseball song, which thing is responsible for keeping the beat in sync? Obviously, the baseline!
76. How can you differentiate between a ball that has been hit over the fences to someone who is late in reaching home? The former is a home run while the other just simply runs home!
Knock Knock Baseball Jokes
These funny knock knock jokes will hit you out of the park with laughter!
77. Knock! Knock!
Who is it out there?
Phillip
Who Phillip?
Let's Phillip the bases.
78. Knock Knock
Who there?
Tess me.
Who's Tess me?
Tess me the baseball.
79. Knock Knock
Who is it out there?
Bass.
Who is Bass?
Bassball is my favorite sport.
80. Knock, Knock
Who's out there?
Dozen.
Who is Dozen?
Dozen anyone here play baseball?
81. Knock Knock
Who's out there?
Meow.
Who is this Meow?
Please, take meow to a baseball game.
82. Knock Knock
Who's there?
Les.
Who is Les?
Let's go and play baseball.
83. Knock Knock
Who's there?
Wanda.
Who is Wanda?
Wanda buy a new baseball bat?
84. Knock Knock
Who is it out there?
Everybody
Who is Everybody?
Everybody is playing baseball.
85. Knock knock!
Who there?
Abase.
Who is this Abase?
Abase ball hit me on my mouf so I talk dis way.
86. Knock Knock
Who is it out there?
Uriah
Who is Uriah?
Keep Uriah on the ball.
Here at Kidadl, we have carefully created lots of great family-friendly puns for everyone to enjoy! If you liked our suggestions for baseball jokes then why not take a look at tennis jokes, or for something different take a look at rugby jokes.
Main image credit: Keeton Gale / Shutterstock.com
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Bachelor of Arts specializing in English, Master of Arts specializing in English
Rajnandini RoychoudhuryBachelor of Arts specializing in English, Master of Arts specializing in English
With a Master of Arts in English, Rajnandini has pursued her passion for the arts and has become an experienced content writer. She has worked with companies such as Writer's Zone and has had her writing skills recognized by publications such as The Telegraph. Rajnandini is also trilingual and enjoys various hobbies such as music, movies, travel, philanthropy, writing her blog, and reading classic British literature.
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