50+ Best House Puns, Jokes And One-Liners

Rajnandini Roychoudhury
Dec 12, 2023 By Rajnandini Roychoudhury
Originally Published on Dec 02, 2020
Edited by Isobel Murphy
Old wooden traditional house and well sweep in heritage park
Age: 0-99
Read time: 6.7 Min

If you are looking for some funny real estate jokes and realtor jokes, then you will love this article!

House puns and jokes may not be very common but they are great conversation starters. Making sure that your house stays radiant and clean is a big aspect of every homeowner's responsibilities.

Spending time at home is relaxing, but now, it can also be fun with these house puns, jokes, and one-liners! These puns and jokes can brighten up your day at home.

If you are a real estate agent yourself, or have a close friend that is a real estate agent, then you will love the real estate puns in this article. New puns on household appliances can be a great way to bring the family members together too.

The list below also includes some great house cleaning puns and jokes. If you enjoy cracking jokes and one-liners at home, this article will not only help in fostering new ideas but will also act as a great stress buster, enjoy!

If you like the idea of going through this amazing list of house puns, you should also check out these boat puns and these tea puns.

Great House Puns

Little gingerbread house

Here is a list of some funny house puns to make you laugh. It also includes some great house cleaning puns to make light work of those chores!

1. When my dad complained that the plates were dirty, my mom said, "But the cutlery is shining, look on the bright side of knife".

2. Houses in London often have cute and colourful doors. They are all adoorable.

3. I hurt myself opening the front door yesterday. The door was so heavy that I could not handle it.

4. The bungalow is known to have been haunted by ghosts in the past. It has got a strange house-story.

5. The man who invented automatic sliding doors definitely deserves a no-bell prize.

6. My dad thought he had won an argument with my mom about how to arrange our house furniture. But when he came back from work, the tables had turned.

7. I was feeling chair-itable so I donated a lot of my old furniture to the homeless shelter near my house.

8. I have been working next to the sink in the kitchen all afternoon. I feel drained now.

9. Have you met the new cook at my house? He is a knife guy.

Amazing House Puns

Here is a list of some home jokes and one-liners that can use to impress your friends and family.

10. Mr. Realtor has become a rich man by only selling refrigerators. He is known to be a fridge magnate.

11. We got a new couch from the furniture store yesterday. Sofa-r, so good.

12. When the couch lost 20% of its body, it said "Ouch!".

13. My realtor friend does not let anyone eat meat at the table. We all have to turn vege-chair-ian.

14. I took the stairs instead of the elevator today. It was nothing but uplifting.

15. When the refrigerator and microwave got married, the toaster gave a brilliant speech.

16. Dishwashers are funny. They are hardly ever in sink.

17.  Realtor sheep like to chill in the baaa-throom.

18. When I got locked out of the house, I decided to break the window and get in. The process was paneful.

19. Every time I enter my house, I am grateful for my house plants. My life would succ without them.

Funny House Puns And Jokes

For all those homebodies, here is a list of some of the best puns and jokes about houses and furniture, which one will make you laugh?

20. I woke up in the morning to see a new version of myself. It was a mirror-cle.

21. The cup complimented the glass and said, "I love how you look. You look very glass-y".

22. The glass complimented the coffee mug and said, "You look absolutely mug-nificient".

23. The screw said to the screwdriver in the toolkit "You drive me crazy!".

24. My mum forced me to discard my old toys, but I was not ready to Lego of them.

25. The remote assured the television that everything was under his control.

26. The mirror in my room was upset. It said it needed some alone time to reflect.

27. When the bulb checked its weight on the weighing scale, he said to himself "Woah! I really am light!".

28. My realtor friend sent me a set of jars for my kitchen. They were a-mason.

29. De-light is the only household appliance that makes me very happy.  

The Best House Puns And One-Liners

Here are some of the most fun home and house puns that you will absolutely love. Why not try out these one-liners on your friends and family next time you are at home?

30. You are most likely to spot a house in a-dress.

31. The Italian man could not enter his own house. He had to gnocchi instead.

32. My dog shed his hair all over the house, specifically on the fur-niture.

33. Only a mon-key will be able to open the lock to my house.

34. I would tell you a joke about my bed, but it hasn't been made up yet.

35. When my sister came back and saw the furniture in her room had been re-arranged, she hit the roof!

36. If you cleaned your mahogany desk, your mom wood be very happy.

37. When my closet picks a fight, it becomes a war-drobe.

38. The guy completely ruined my kitchen. I need to give myself time to let that sink in.

Awesome Home Puns

Here is a list of some unique and interesting home puns for all the house-proud families! This list also has some gingerbread house puns to use when you have created your masterpiece.

39. A real estate agent's favourite beverage is proper-tea .

40. The real estate agent failed to sell the house that was close to the stable. Every visitor was apprehensive about their neigh-bour's behaviour.

41. He is a well known realtor. The only beverage he likes is real-tea.

42. I asked him if I liked the unusual design of the roof even though I knew it had gone over his head.

43. Zombies are most afraid of the living room.

44. We had to get our vacuum cleaner exchanged. The previous one sucked.

45. My dad loves surfing. He loves cooking too but he always has to do it from scratch because he hates micro-waves.

46. Dad made a huge gingerbread house with the kids. It was very sweet.

47. I wrote a song about how I changed the lock of my house door. There was a key change in it.

48. What are the only rooms without any doors or windows? Mushrooms!

49. The cook used only one side of the kitchen and made some amazing dishes. He was truly counter productive.

50. I could not successfully assemble the furniture I got from the store that day. My mom said, "You only have your shelf to blame for this".

51. I was not certain about making our furniture ourselves. But my mom encouraged us and said "I am sure it wood work".

52. I am an introvert. When I am asked what my favourite genre of music is, I always say it is House.

53.  My furniture can't communicate with us when we're talking in English. It only speaks the Polish language.

54. My grandmother left behind her favourite rocking chair. We chair-ish it.

55. We always have some spare chairs in our house. We save them for emergency seat-uations.

56. We had a small table that did not fit everyone. But we decided to chair it with our neighbours.

Here at Kidadl, we have carefully created lots of great family-friendly puns for everyone to enjoy! If you liked our suggestions for the best house puns, jokes, and one liners, then why not take a look at these bone puns, or for something other than puns, take a look at our list of the skeleton jokes for kids.

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Written by Rajnandini Roychoudhury

Bachelor of Arts specializing in English, Master of Arts specializing in English

Rajnandini Roychoudhury picture

Rajnandini RoychoudhuryBachelor of Arts specializing in English, Master of Arts specializing in English

With a Master of Arts in English, Rajnandini has pursued her passion for the arts and has become an experienced content writer. She has worked with companies such as Writer's Zone and has had her writing skills recognized by publications such as The Telegraph. Rajnandini is also trilingual and enjoys various hobbies such as music, movies, travel, philanthropy, writing her blog, and reading classic British literature. 

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