80 Running Puns That Will Have You Out Of Breath With Laughter

Rajnandini Roychoudhury
Dec 12, 2023 By Rajnandini Roychoudhury
Originally Published on Dec 01, 2020
Edited by Flora Wilson
Young women laughing together dressed casually isolated over yellow wall.
Age: 0-99
Read time: 9.8 Min

Funny running puns can be the best way to motivate your running buddies during that early morning run.

There are plenty of funny quotes for running on the internet. Yet, other than the funny running quotes and jokes about running, a running pun can be hard to find.

However, some running and runner jokes can be changed into puns with a hilarious effect. Other than that, one can always make new innovative running puns that will make everyone laugh.

So, without much further ado, dash and sprint through the list of funny puns about running and see if you can keep pace with them.

Some of these puns are full marathon puns or half marathon puns that sit well with all kinds of race puns and runner puns. If you want, you can also include the racing puns here as running Instagram captions and it would look great if you are a seasonal runner.

If you are interested in reading more such puns, take a look at our other jokes and puns articles: football jokes and tennis jokes.

Race & Running Puns

There are plenty of 5k jokes and marathon jokes, but nothing can cheer up a marathon runner like good old puns on running. Take a look at some of them:

1. Dogs and cats are not allowed to run a marathon because they are not part of the human race.

2. I have never seen a runner, who was supposed to be the winner, fail this bad at a race. I guess this is what happens when you wear tank tops to a race.

3. There was this guy in the neighborhood who would never stop running. He was known around these parts as the jogger-naut.

4. I nearly missed the 5k  yesterday morning because I was running late.

5. I knew this comedian who had a weird joke in his act. He would stuff a cloth into his mouth and run from one side of the stage to the other. He called the act 'The Running Gag'.

6. In our university, there was this underdog racer named Moore. When he surprisingly beat everyone to win a marathon, the commentator joked that it was a classic example of Moore ran what meets the eye.

7. The sprinters have a fixed routine for going to sleep. They always fall fast asleep.

8. Every time I tell running jokes to sprinters and runners, they always get it. Guess their sense of humor ain't slow.

9. We recently held a marathon for all the church priests in our county. The marathon was called the 5K Rev-run!

10. My father would never give money to charities organizing marathons because, according to him, they would always take your money and run.

11. I decided to take my dog to the county race competition. He did well in the longer races, while he was terrible in the short sprints. It was apparent that my dog would do better in the long run.

12. Two cowardly sprinters got into a fight after the marathon. I heard it was a hit and run.

13. The army tank was moving surprisingly fast. This was because the driver was wearing a racerback tank.

14. At the intercontinental sports meet, the most self-proclaimed sprinters came from the country of Iran.

15. I wanted to tell you one of my running jokes, but it somehow ran away.

16. It has been a long-standing tradition in our family to participate in a marathon every year; I guess it runs in our genes.

17. The married couple always ran marathons together because they were the running mates.

18. The running shoes would last for two years- that was the gua-ran-tee!

19. One should never train for sprints. That way, athletes would only win in the short run.

20. Sprinter and time are not the best of friends because sprinters always race against time.

21. The runner with a terrible cough and cold beat the others in the race because the cold made him feel extra runny.

22. I recently completed a cross country marathon in the middle-east as Iran to Iraq.

23. I don't particularly appreciate running marathons because it gives me the runs.

24. My sprinter friend, while running, pranks people by pretending to have diarrhoea. This is his running joke.

25. During the marathon, the Swedish runner, couldn't complete the race because he stopped just before the Finnish line.

26. Long-distance runners usually are good students because their education pays off in the long run.

27. The favorite subject of a marathon runner in high school is jog-raphy.

28. Even though I got some running shoes to get fit, I am so out of shape that I can't even keep up with them.

29. All the marathon runners were disappointed that the race had been canceled- another run bites the dust.

30. The baseball batter practices at his home treadmill whenever he gets the time because he loves his home runs.

Sprints and Lap Puns

Take a look at these awesome lap puns and sprint puns. They just might motivate you enough to run like your sprinting hero!

31. When the runners lost the relay race due to a language problem, they decided that they had to work on their lap-se of communication.

32. No matter how much the coach asked the sprinter to speed up during the last lap, he didn't, and as a result, he lost the race. Guess he doesn't know how to take a sprhint.

33. All the track and field athletes are known to use one network provider- Sprint.

34. All racers have to be in sprint condition before a race.

35. During the marathon, my grandfather, was trailing way behind me. I am pretty sure this is because of the generation lap between us.

36. When a sprinter wants to watch a time-travel movie, he simply plays the iconic film 'Track to the Future'.

37. I think I will switch from telling track jokes to animal puns, just for a track of better options.

38. The runner threw away the lead he had gained during the race because of a lap-se in concentration.

39. The sprinter who had the fastest lap in the 1000m was given the special prize of a lap-top.

Speed and Fast Puns

Who doesn't like a runner who can run at speed and overtake opponents? Well, these pacy puns just might overtake other puns too!

40. Runners never eat a full meal before the race because they are supposed to fast.

41. The only type of meal that runners eat before a big race to be at their peak powers is fast food.

42. Sprinters get their money from the bank by dashing in their cheques.

43. It surprised everyone when the previous champion failed to qualify for the sprint finals. What a fall from pace!

44. Even after the heart surgery, the marathon runner was setting the pace for this marathon. Guess this is why he had a pacemaker.

45. For many Christians, the best time to run a race is during Lent because that is when they fast.

46. Hyphenated middle names of most Olympic sprinters have a 100-meter dash in them.

47. The marathon racer had a fear of speed bumps on the road. He is slowly getting over it.

48. In the race conducted by the military to determine which armored vehicle was the fastest, racerback tanks came out on top.

49. The speed of a cheetah can be measured using the unit kilometers purr hour.

Other Funny Running Related Puns

Two young brothers with natural red hair playing in outdoor together.

You may want some track puns or track and field puns to get your game of puns up to speed. Take a look at this compilation of puns from all things running:

50. The pirates of the world decided to take part in a race. They named the event Piracy.

51. The sloth chose T-Mobile as his network provider because he couldn't get to Sprint.

52. Barbers always win a marathon and other races because they know how to take the short cut.

53. Sprinters from Finland always win a race because whenever you start the race, they already Finnish.

54. After winning a recently held marathon primary election, the Senator decided to run for president.

55. The first runner in humanity's history was Adam because he was the first in the human race.

56. Nick Jonas and Nicholas Cage once run a race for charity. They both got first place because they were Nick and Nick at the finishing line.

57. The sprinter finished the race first despite having a late start because he was running a delay.

58. Pigs can never run marathons due to always pulling their hamstrings.

59. The bay cow surprised everyone at the farm by running so fast. I think he really knows how to use his calf muscles.

60. When my friend Tyrell won a marathon, the Taiwanese national anthem was played. This was because Ty-won.

61. Penguins have a reputation of emerging as winners in marathons because they peng-win.

62. Sir Paul McCartney was stopped from running a marathon once. He got banned on the run.

63. I had a friend who had once signed up for a 5k run but forgot when and where it started. Oh boy, this is a story - I don't know where to begin!

64. The police were waiting to arrest the runner at the finish line because he beat his opponent in the marathon.

65. When the couch won the marathon, his other couch friends were shocked because they hadn't realized before that he could run sofa!

66. After the judges disqualified me from the race, everyone started jogging me.

67. Once again, a Kenyan has won the marathon race. Kenya believe their superiority and dominance?

68. The husband who had recently lost his wife joined the marathon in her memory. It was his mourning run.

69. There is a 'Sore Us' run for charity where you are supposed to run until you simply cannot anymore. My friend Tyson ran that race last year. It is still hard for me to believe that Tyrannosaurus.

70. Strings and ropes never take part in a race because they always tie.

71. When all the numbers came together for a race, the number 1 emerged victorious. This is because he one.

72. Papers are never likely to run and win races because they are, by definition, stationary.

73. In the first race, the elite sprinter was a comfortable winner by two feet. He won by more distance in the next race without giving any effort because he was declared the winner by forfeit.

74. There have been efforts to have a marathon in Antarctica. The winners will be felicitated in the medal of nowhere.

75. In the race of vegetables and fruits, the orange couldn't win the sprint because it ran out of juice.

76. In a race, after the two friends reached the finish line, they fist-bumped. Guess we could say that, in a way, the finish line was the punchline.

77. Just as the sprinter started their practice sessions, many dogs and cats suddenly entered the track and started running with them. Well, it was training cats and dogs.

78. Marathon runners who race wearing shoes with a bad sole have to look forward to the agony and pain of da-feet.

79. The vegetarian runner gave up his life in marathon running because he wasn't a big fan of the meets.

80. The marathon runner was detained in the middle of the marathon by the police because he was resisting a rest.

Here at Kidadl, we have carefully created lots of great family-friendly puns for everyone to enjoy! If you liked our suggestions for running puns then why not take a look at rugby jokes, or for something different take a look at dolphin jokes.

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Written by Rajnandini Roychoudhury

Bachelor of Arts specializing in English, Master of Arts specializing in English

Rajnandini Roychoudhury picture

Rajnandini RoychoudhuryBachelor of Arts specializing in English, Master of Arts specializing in English

With a Master of Arts in English, Rajnandini has pursued her passion for the arts and has become an experienced content writer. She has worked with companies such as Writer's Zone and has had her writing skills recognized by publications such as The Telegraph. Rajnandini is also trilingual and enjoys various hobbies such as music, movies, travel, philanthropy, writing her blog, and reading classic British literature. 

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