103+ Fantastic Windows Jokes To Have The Whole Family Laughing

Rajnandini Roychoudhury
Jun 15, 2023 By Rajnandini Roychoudhury
Originally Published on Apr 24, 2023
Fact-checked by Shadiya Ahammad
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Whether you use Windows or Mac book, or maybe sometimes you’re on the Linux server, you have at least heard one joke which is related to technology or computer.

It was released about 30 years ago, and since then, it has gone through several updates and bugs. Sometimes you also face the problem of updates happening between your assignments or homework, and that is very frustrating, right?

We have created a list of painfully funny jokes that you will definitely love regarding your computer or technology. Here are some funny jokes that ever Microsoft windows user will laugh at.

Microsoft Windows Jokes

Here are some amazingly funny Microsoft windows jokes that will definitely make you and your friends laugh, reminiscing the old times!

  • Why was the computer feeling cold? Maybe someone left the windows open?
  • Why did the two computers break up? One was a Mac, the other was windows. They were just not compatible.
  • Why do you avoid telling jokes about Windows? They might start updating.
  • Why did my boss not believe me when I said I had Microsoft Office skills? Maybe he thinks I should excel in it.
  • How to improve my outlook on the future? Just update Microsoft Office.
  • Do you know why Microsoft employees can never relax? Because they are always on Edge.
  • Why could the laptop not remove the cap? Because the Caps Lock was on.
  • What did the tech support say when I could not fix the computer? Turn it off and then turn it on again.
  • How did the laptop help himself out of the house? He used windows.
  • Which laptop has no windows? A Mac book.
  • What did the man say to the thief who stole his Microsoft Office? You have my word, I will find you.
  • What is the similarity between stainless steel and Microsoft Edge? Both of them are a minimum of 11% Chrome.
  • What will you get if you get a tattoo of the Microsoft founder? A Bill.
  • Do you know the similarity between Hollywood and Microsoft? Each release makes it worse.
  • What would the name be if Amazon acquired a part of the Microsoft search engine? That would be Amazing.
  • What would happen if you deleted the Microsoft Edge browser? That would be some Cutting Edge technology.
  • Why were they angry when I created software similar to Microsoft? I guess it's their Word against mine.
  • What is common between climate change and Microsoft Excel? They have both been around since the ’80s, and the boomers still don't get it.
  • Why did the little girl refuse to use Microsoft Excel again? I guess she had a sheet experience!
  • Did you know that Microsoft is bad at creating and writing music? It's because they have experience using only OneNote.
  • Do you know why I refused when a guy offered to create a document of my life in Microsoft Excel? I was scared he would spreadsheet about me.
  • What did the Magic 8 Ball say about a client of Microsoft? Outlook not great.
  • What did my teacher say during my first class of Microsoft Office? They said I Excel in it.
  • How many fanboys of Microsoft and Sony are required to turn a light bulb on? I am not sure they don't go near a Switch.

Windows Users Jokes

Windows users have always faced some or other difficulty when the Windows update begins. Here, we put a little twist on these old memories and tickle your laughing bone.

  • What are the 3 worst fears of our generation? Low battery, low network and Windows 10.
  • Do you know what the last words of Stephen Hawking were? The logout sound of Windows XP.
  • Why was the husband angry at his wife? Because she poured water on frozen Windows, and now the computer is messed up.
  • Do you know why we never had Windows 9? It's because 7 8 9.
  • How did Windows 9 take Windows 10 out on a date? Guess he had enough Windows XP-rience.
  • What would you label someone who is trying to get your attention even after you rejected them? Windows 10.
  • Do you ever feel like an unimportant individual? Think about Windows 9, and you will feel better.
  • What is the one thing that the users of Windows 10 will not get? Privacy.
  • Do you know why Adobe illustrator is not talking to Windows 10? We are not sure, Adobe illustrator just stopped responding.
  • What is the similarity between a nonresponsive program on Windows and a man who is in a coma? Either you wait for it to respond or move on.
  • Why is a MacBook consistently hotter than a PC? It's because a MacBook does not have Windows.
  • What is the similarity between a computer and an air conditioner? Both will become less efficient if you open Windows.
  • Do you know that Windows users care more about the environment than Mac users? It's because windows have a recycling bin, while Mac has trash cans.
  • Why do the astronauts on the International Space Station use MacBook? It's because they are in space and can't open windows.
  • What did Microsoft say when Chuck Norris decided to update his windows? We accept your terms and conditions.
  • Do you know why Mace Windu has never used Microsoft? It's because he's always had horrible experiences with windows.
  • Why is the Microsoft Store so windy? Because all its Windows are open.
  • Why could the mean lady not get anything done on a computer with Windows? She kept asking for the Task Manager.
  • Do you know why Microsoft went from Windows 8 to Windows 10? They were trying to hold onto their German market.
  • Why was the lady shocked when she heard that the cleaner made over $1,000,000 by cleaning windows? He said he invented the Norton Anti-Virus.
  • What is the difference between a computer and a car? If you install a car with Windows, it will crash less.
  • Why do people hate Windows 10 so much? It is definitely better than what you thin
  • What could be the punishment for this girl who cheated on a test? Installing Windows 8 on her computer.
  • Did you know that Eric Clapton prefers the OSX? It's only because he doesn't like his Windows open.
  • What is the similarity between the government and Windows 10? Our 'hope' that the next version is better.
  • What was the joke told by a computer student in a class? He said, Windows Vista, that is all.
  • Why did the little girl buy curtains for her computer? She said it had Windows.
  • What was the couple doing outside the Microsoft Store at night? I guess they were just Window shopping.
  • What would you call a man who goes around town and peeks through windows? A Windows Explorer for sure.
  • Why was Windows 10 compared to a moody teenager? Because nobody understands either.
  • Why was my wife upset after the new Windows was installed? Maybe it was a pane for her.
  • Why did the daydreamer prefer a PC over a Mac book? Because it would help them stare out of Windows all day long.
  • How would you find out that something was wrong at the Microsoft office? They haven't updated Windows in the last 2 weeks.
  • Why did the gamer have trouble playing on a PC with a Windows Key? Because it takes you out of the game.
  • Why is resuming or restarting Windows just like a half-eaten cake? It doesn't feel the same when you return for the rest and end up moving on to better things.
  • What becomes less accurate by putting in more information? The search bar on Windows.
  • Do you know why I was living life on Edge? Because my mother asked me to live life like a Windows 10 user.
  • Why did the Windows 10 box say 'halts all hackers'? It's because even the hackers can't understand how Windows 10 works.
  • Do you know why I always end up using Windows XP? Because it guarantees that there won't be any Windows updates.
  • What will happen to the Windows employee who is fired from Microsoft Office? Maybe, they will be defenestrated.
  • If the White House had no windows, what would you call it? A Greenhouse, maybe?
  • What is the similarity between Windows 10 and a celebrity? Both have been 'getting ready' for over 2 hours now.
  • Do you know which store would be the best to buy Peeping Tom a gift from? The Microsoft Store, because they like Windows.
  • Do you know why the little girl put her laptop inside the microwave? She didn't know what to do when the windows froze during startup.
  • What is the difference between a megaphone and Windows XP? You will go deaf with Windows XP.
  • Why was the turtle impressed with the PC? He had Windows PowerShell.

Bill Gates Jokes

Bill Gates is the founder of Microsoft and is responsible for Windows updates. Read these jokes that will definitely light up the room.

  • What did the employees at Microsoft say when Bill Gates gave his motivational speech? Word!
  • Did you know that Bill Gates agreed to pay for the president's wall? His only condition was that he gets to install Windows.
  • Do you know what would happen if Bill Gates and Elon Musk decided to collaborate? The Windows on Teslas would Elon-Gate.
  • Did you know that Bill Gates his house does not have a basement? It's because he likes to have Windows.
  • Do you know why the name Windows was chosen for the software at Microsoft? Because its founder already had too many Gates.

Windows Error Jokes

Windows has been the centre of many jokes since its inception. Here are few jokes that will remind you of the good old times.

  • What is the biggest lie in the history of this world? 'This won't take long' on your computer screen.
  • Why are the 2 bad things about Windows Vista? If you played backwards, you could hear some chanting that is satanic, and if you played forwards, it would install Vista.
  • Why was the computer overheating so much? Because the Windows was not working.
  • Why did I install Linux on my laptop? Because the box was labelled 'requires Windows 10 or better.'
  • What is the similarity between Windows 98 and Spiderman? They are constantly rebooting.
  • What is the similarity between Windows 7 and the dinosaur-killing Meteor? They're both really old, and they both crashed.
  • What is the fastest way to break through someone's windows? Delete System 32.

Apple Vs Windows Jokes

The rivalry between Apple and Windows will always be present. The Apple users will defend their product and Windows will defend themselves. Here are some jokes that may help lighten the rivalry -

  • Did you know that Bill created Microsoft and Steve created Apple? They sure opened a lot of Gates for Jobs.
  • Why would Apple never make a car? Because they are not compatible with Windows.
  • Why was the Microsoft user feeling suffocated in an Apple Store? Because there was no Windows.
  • Why was the Mac user so shocked when Apple decided to release their electric car in 2024? He was surprised that Apple was going to create a product with Windows.
  • The police asked me if I knew why the Apple Store was robbed. I told them it was because they don't have Windows.
  • What was the one thing that Apple left out while making their office? Windows, of course.
  • What is worse than a worm that you find in your apple? The fact that your Windows may have a bug.
  • What was the one thing Steve Jobs wanted to exclude from his new house? Windows.
  • What is the name of the person who smashes Windows? Steve Jobs.
  • Why was Steve Jobs afraid of driving? His car didn't have windows.

Hilarious Computer Jokes

Unlike a computer, computer jokes do not have bugs because they all work just fine. Here are a few jokes on computer and it's system that your kid can laugh at long with the windows jokes while doing their computer homework.

  • What is the first rule of programming? If it works, don't touch it.
  • What is hardware? The part of a computer that you can kick.
  • What is debugging? Debugging is like a detective in a crime movie where you can also become the murderer.
  • When do you know you're desperate for an answer? When you look at page number 2 of Google.
  • Do you know what are the 2 steps to saving the world? Step number one, create a document and name it 'the world', step number 2, save the document.
  • Do you know how many programs are required to change a light bulb? None, that problem is for the hardware.
  • Why was the mouse looking at the computer in anger? It thought there was an impostor.
  • What did the computer say when there was a technical glitch? Human error.
  • What is a home? Where WiFi is connected automatically.
  • Why do I hear music coming out of the printer? Maybe the papers are jammin.
  • What did one computer say to the other? Everything is under CTRL.

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Sources

https://www.boredpanda.com/funny-microsoft-windows-jokes/

https://upjoke.com/windows-jokes

https://worstjokesever.com/windowshttps://new.smalljoys.tv/25-funny-microsoft-jokes/

https://jokojokes.com/windows-jokes.html

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Written by Rajnandini Roychoudhury

Bachelor of Arts specializing in English, Master of Arts specializing in English

Rajnandini Roychoudhury picture

Rajnandini RoychoudhuryBachelor of Arts specializing in English, Master of Arts specializing in English

With a Master of Arts in English, Rajnandini has pursued her passion for the arts and has become an experienced content writer. She has worked with companies such as Writer's Zone and has had her writing skills recognized by publications such as The Telegraph. Rajnandini is also trilingual and enjoys various hobbies such as music, movies, travel, philanthropy, writing her blog, and reading classic British literature. 

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Fact-checked by Shadiya Ahammad

Bachelor of Arts specializing in English Language and Literature, Master of Arts specializing in India and World Literature

Shadiya Ahammad picture

Shadiya AhammadBachelor of Arts specializing in English Language and Literature, Master of Arts specializing in India and World Literature

A skilled writer and content creator with a postgraduate degree in English literature from the University of Calicut, Shadiya has also completed a Master of Arts in World Literature from Widya Dharma University and studied English Language and Literature at the Indian Institute of Technology, Bombay. With her educational background and four years of experience in content writing, Shadiya has developed excellent research, communication, and writing skills, which she brings to her work every day. Her passion for language extends beyond her professional work, as she enjoys studying Arabic and Spanish in her free time.

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