50+ Best Pirate Puns That Arrrrgh Very Funny

Rajnandini Roychoudhury
Dec 12, 2023 By Rajnandini Roychoudhury
Originally Published on Dec 01, 2020
Edited by Flora Wilson
50+ Best Pirate Puns That Arrrrgh Very Funny
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Age: 0-99
Read time: 7.7 Min

You're going to be blown away by these hysterical and historical pirate puns.

Pirates are known to be sea robbers who hunt wealthy ships and carry a bundle of loot. They are generally unkempt and robust.

Their usual attire consists of waistcoats and knitted caps, and they are also known to wear eye patches. Blackbeard was a notorious pirate in the 16th century who commanded four ships.

He mainly travelled around the West Indies and North American colonies. Pirates were spotted as early as the 14th century when a group of raiders attacked various ships from Mediterranean societies.

The article has many pirate puns that you will surely fall in love with! This list includes some wise boat puns, some funny pirate puns and pirate one-liners, some hook puns, and some puns with the word 'aye'.

It also has a few wooden leg puns and treasure puns that will keep you hooked till the end. These puns and one-liners can be of great use for events like 'Pirate Day'. This list also includes answers to some cool riddles like "How much did the pirate pay to get his ears pierced?"

and "What did the pirate say when he saw his girlfriend?". Read on to get hold of some eye patch puns and funny pirate one-liners.

If you want to keep reading about pirates, you can head over to pirate jokes, or you can try some of these amazing boat puns.

Witty Pirate Puns

These funny pirate puns will have you laughing out loud. These puns can also be converted into some great knock-knock jokes or riddles. You don't need to call a pirate to understand these puns.   Here is a list of some witty and bad pirate puns that will keep you laughing for hours.  :

1. Funnily enough, I have always seen pirates using aye phones.

2. Pirates always get everything at lower prices. The reason being, they always shop on sail.

3. Pirates are always very healthy. They never have a deficiency of Vitamin sea.

4. Playing a card game with a pirate can be a risky affair. They always stand on the deck.

5. I have always seen pirates supporting the Arr-gentinian football team.

6. To err is human. But to arr is pirate.

7. Pirates make the best singers. They hit the high sea notes with ease.

8. The pirate wore a pant and suit for the first time. He looked like he had dressed for a cor-pirate meeting.

9. Pirates are breathing the salty sea air all year long. They have to be very careful about res-pirat-ory problems.

10. When we saw the pirates arr-iving, we decided to rush from there.

Funny Pirate Puns

Actor posing for photographers

You can easily get anyone to laugh by cracking these funny pirate puns on Halloween or any other festive day. Funny pirate puns don't need to just be reserved for children, anyone can crack them anywhere.  Here is a list of some pirate jokes and pirate food puns that you will love:

11. The food pirates were finally found and arrr-ested by the cops.

12. The ocean never says anything to the pirates. It just waves.

13. The pirates never talk to anyone properly. They are extremely arrr-ogant.

14. I had to talk to the pirate yesterday. We made aye to aye contact.

15. The pirate loves to workout. His favorite exercise is the plank.

16. I had gone for a pirate's 80th birthday party. When I asked the old pirate his age, he said "Aye Matey years old".

17. I asked the pirate how he is always calm and composed. He said, "eye patch up as soon as I fight with someone".

18. I was confused about the pirate's favorite alphabet. Was it arr, aye or sea?

19. Pirates save on a lot of money when they shop . They always go to second-hand shops.

20. I really wanted my friend to watch this new Netflix show about pirates so I told him, "it will get you hooked, I promise."

Clever Pirate Puns

Here are some clever and funny pirate puns that will certainly level up your pun game:

21. It was easy to guess the pirate's favorite musical instrument. It had to be the guit-arrr.

22. If a pirate entered an Apple store, he would most certainly be drawn to the iPatch.

23. Pirates are great at solving math problems. They are always trying to find out where X is.

24. The pirate loved to draw and paint. Arrr-t was definitely his favorite subject.

25. The pirate walked into the salon with his mates. He got himself a crew cut.

26. When the pirates let me out of the ship, each one of them said 'Goodb-aye' to me.

27. It is very difficult to call a pirate. They always tend to leave their phones off the hook.

28. The pirate had to visit the doctor immediately. He could not sea a thing.

29. The pirate was asked what he aspired to be when he was young. He said he always wanted to be an arrr-chitect.

30. When the pirate broke his leg, he had to call the c-arrr-penter.

Amazing Pirate Puns

Here is a list of some of the best pirate puns, including some 'buck an ear' and 'ears pierced' pirate puns. Here are some of the most amazing pirate puns and one-liners that you can use as great conversation starters at parties:

31. The pirate was certain he could run. He knew his legs wood work.

32. The pirate was upset because he was having a hard time learning a dance. He could never get the hook step right.

33. My friend asked me, "What does the pirate say about his girlfriend?". I was sure he said, "she had me at Ahoy!".

34. Pirates are not very fond of eating vegetables, especially leeks.

35. The pirate gets very excited when the hook of a song plays.

36. My mother asked me how much did the pirate pay to get his ears pierced. I was certain he paid a buck an ear for it.

37. The pirate was having a really hard time finding his contact lenses. He forgot that his ayes have them.

38. The only thing the pirate says when he is angry is "Arrr-gh".

39. A pirate accused his colleague of being a bad sailor. His colleague replied, "You are the one to dock?".

40. The pirate dressed up as Santa Claus last Christmas. He went around singing "Row Row Row!".

Best Pirate Puns

These puns can be transformed into a variety of pirate jokes. Pirate jokes make for hilarious ice breakers, and anybody who's fluent in pirate jokes ends up having a treasure trove of great memories. Here's a list of the best pirate puns just for you.

41. When a pirate makes a mistake, he says "Aye am so stupid!".

42. The pirate says he wants to earn a lot of money, by hook or by crook.

43. I could not take my kid for a movie based on the life of the pirate. It was an arr rated film.

44. The pirate had to pay an arm and a leg for his hook and peg leg.

45. The pirates were really misbehaving. They do not know how to maintain deck-orum.

46. The Jolly Roger was everywhere in the pirate-themed party. It made for amazing deck-oration.

47. When the captain saw the pirate smiling and laughing, he said: "You look jolly, Roger!".

48. When a pirate skips his important classes, he is called Captain Hooky.

49. I went for a Halloween party yesterday. The pirate wore a pumpkin patch.

50. When the pirates were playing hide and seek, one of them said to the other "I sea you!".

Cool Pirate Puns

Here is a list of some of the coolest pirate puns that will make you sound really cool when you are cracking jokes and puns in a crowd:

51. The pirate stopped playing golf. He kept hooking the ball.

52. The amateur pirate asked his senior why he did not take enough rest during summer. The senior pirate said, 'Tis the sea-sun to find a lot of gold".

53. When the pirate tried to boost his crew's morale, he said: "Do not get tide down!".

54. The pirates live their lives to the fullest. They know how to seas the day.

55. The old pirate was telling us about his horrible old crew members. He said, "The ocean has made me salty!".

56. We lost our way in the middle of the ocean and asked the pirates if they could help us. They said, "We are not shore!".

57. When we heard the gunshot and saw the pirate ship, we knew we were in deep water.

58. The pirate was telling us about his childhood and youth. Those were his most treasured memories.

59. The two pirate ships did not even confront each other. They were fighting a Gold War.

60. The pirate wanted to quit smoking. The doctor told him going gold turkey was the only option he had.

Here at Kidadl, we have carefully created lots of great family-friendly puns for everyone to enjoy! If you liked our suggestions for pirate puns, then why not take a look at parrot jokes, or for something different take a look at fish jokes.

Article image credit: Luca Ponti / Shutterstock.com

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Written by Rajnandini Roychoudhury

Bachelor of Arts specializing in English, Master of Arts specializing in English

Rajnandini Roychoudhury picture

Rajnandini RoychoudhuryBachelor of Arts specializing in English, Master of Arts specializing in English

With a Master of Arts in English, Rajnandini has pursued her passion for the arts and has become an experienced content writer. She has worked with companies such as Writer's Zone and has had her writing skills recognized by publications such as The Telegraph. Rajnandini is also trilingual and enjoys various hobbies such as music, movies, travel, philanthropy, writing her blog, and reading classic British literature. 

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